Dating app scam victims told 'don't suffer in silence'

BBC News

21-06-2025

Students are being urged not to suffer in silence when targeted by scams on dating apps, as investigators see blackmail cases rise.Fraud teams at Nationwide, the UK's biggest building society, said trusted friends could help potential victims avoid sending private or intimate images during new online relationships. Anyone who has been scammed should report cases to the authorities, they said.One student in Cardiff told the BBC how a drink in the pub had alerted them to the risk of a friend being tricked by fraudsters using AI technology.Last year, the National Crime Agency (NCA) put out its first ever all-school alert, warning teenagers about the dangers of sextortion.
Blackmail warning
Sextortion is when criminals pose as young people online, trick a victim into sending sexually explicit material, and then blackmail them.Annya Burksys, head of fraud operations at Nationwide, said that scammers were "efficient and unrelenting". As a result, these kinds of scams were "commonplace" among students.Data on such crimes is difficult to gather, as they are recorded in different ways or are never reported at all. A survey by Nationwide suggested 28% of students asked had been scammed, and 50% of students worried about becoming a victim.Last year, BBC News sent a Freedom of Information request to every police force in the UK, asking how many reported blackmail offences featured the word "sextortion" over the last decade.The 33 forces (out of a total of 45) who responded recorded almost 8,000 blackmail cases logged with a reference to sextortion in 2023. The same number of forces recorded just 23 in 2014. All the forces to respond were in England and Wales.
'You're talking to a bot'
On a night out with friends, Emma Evans, a student in Cardiff, was chatting to one of them about his chats on dating apps.He suggested the group look through some of the conversations, but one "particularly attractive and particularly keen" match raised alarm bells."We looked at this chat and the thing that gave it away was that this person was saying the same words over and over again," Emma told BBC Radio 4's You and Yours."For example, he kept on saying how he wanted to find someone who is really passionate over and over again, and he wasn't really answering my friend's questions."The group pointed out to their friend that the language seemed to be the speech patterns of an AI chatbot.
Talk to a friend
Jim Winters, head of economic crime at Nationwide, urged people not to overshare images, particularly with someone they had never met."Blackmail is one of the hardest things to face and it's happening more often. It's not easy but if something doesn't feel right, speak up," he said. "It might be tempting in the moment to share information or photos but once shared, you will never have control over it again."He has the following tips:Look out for odd phrases in messages and conversations that do not relate to what you have writtenPut any profile photos into a search engine and see if they have been used elsewhere, and are stock imagesIf you are unsure about a situation, show the messages to someone else for a second opinion before things go too farAnyone who is being blackmailed should report their case to the authorities, for help and support"Talk to someone you trust, maybe a friend or family member. Don't suffer in silence," he said.
Exploiting grief
As well as targeting young people near the start of their lives, fraudsters have been stepping up their attempts to trick the friends and family of people who have died.Criminals exploit the grief of bereaved families by impersonating them online and charging mourners to see funeral livestreams that should be free, according to the Chartered Trading Standards Institute (CTSI) which supports businesses and local authorities' trading standards officers.These livestreams became more popular during lockdown, and have continued since for those who struggle to attend a funeral in person.Fraudsters contact mourners with bogus links to watch a funeral and demand payment, or set up fake donation pages on legitimate websites.Katherine Hart, CTSI lead officer for doorstep crime, said: "This is a truly despicable scam – targeting people during one of the most emotionally difficult moments of their lives. "It's hard to imagine a more callous form of fraud. What's particularly upsetting is that victims often feel they can't report what's happened for fear of adding further stress to grieving families. "That silence is exactly what these criminals are counting on. We need people to stay vigilant, share warnings and report anything suspicious."