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Peter Thiel Shows Trump How To Sort Spreadsheet Of Americans By Ethnicity

Peter Thiel Shows Trump How To Sort Spreadsheet Of Americans By Ethnicity

The Onion14 hours ago
WASHINGTON—Stressing that it would be simplest to troubleshoot now during the onboarding process for his company's surveillance technology, Palantir founder Peter Thiel reportedly spent Tuesday morning showing President Donald Trump how to sort a spreadsheet of Americans by ethnicity. 'So what's neat is that you can just do command-shift-E and rank every single resident from whitest to least,' said the billionaire libertarian, leaning over the commander-in-chief's shoulder and demonstrating how simple it was to use a drop-down menu to search for undesirable ethnic characteristics among the more than 340 million names on display. 'Nope, that's religion, Mr. President. You want to be over in column E. I went ahead and separated the Jews from the regular Caucasians for you. Oh, sure, I guess you can call them that if you want. That's what the label section is for.' At press time, reports confirmed a flustered Thiel was attempting to answer the president's question on whether deleting a person from the spreadsheet would also delete them in real life.
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Paramount agrees to pay $16M to settle Trump lawsuit over '60 Minutes' interview
Paramount agrees to pay $16M to settle Trump lawsuit over '60 Minutes' interview

USA Today

time4 minutes ago

  • USA Today

Paramount agrees to pay $16M to settle Trump lawsuit over '60 Minutes' interview

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Trump's 'Giant Win' Does Not Validate His Unconstitutional Birthright Citizenship Order
Trump's 'Giant Win' Does Not Validate His Unconstitutional Birthright Citizenship Order

Yahoo

time23 minutes ago

  • Yahoo

Trump's 'Giant Win' Does Not Validate His Unconstitutional Birthright Citizenship Order

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Trump urges Hamas to accept 60-day truce after Israel agrees ‘for the good of the Middle East'
Trump urges Hamas to accept 60-day truce after Israel agrees ‘for the good of the Middle East'

News24

time29 minutes ago

  • News24

Trump urges Hamas to accept 60-day truce after Israel agrees ‘for the good of the Middle East'

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