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The Sun
35 minutes ago
- The Sun
Ten things Brits hate about adulting the most from constant cleaning to overspending at the shops, survey reveals
BRITS have revealed the worst things about 'adulting' – with constantly cleaning, the mental load - and never having time for anything at the top of the list. A poll of 2,000 Brits found 19 per cent bemoaned struggling with mysterious joint pain for seemingly no reason. 1 While nearly a tenth (eight per cent) get wound up trying to remember every single password they've ever created. It also emerged 78 per cent feel there are simply not enough hours in the day, rising to 90 per cent for Millennials. With the average adult spending 364 hours a year simply making dinner - 2.6 years of their lives in total. As a result, 80 per cent of 29-44-year-olds claim just one extra hour a day would vastly improve their mood. A spokesperson for meal prep company Frive, which commissioned the research, said: "People feel like passengers in their own lives. 'Many of us grow up thinking that once we reach a certain age, everything will click into place - but the truth is, being an adult comes with a steep learning curve that no one really prepares you for.' Other things respondents hate about being an adult included feeling there was no one to take care of them (16 per cent). While 13 per cent are often left frustrated by going to the shop for one thing - and somehow ending up spending £40. But having to 'adult' has left 63 per cent of time-poor Millennials unable to do any of the things they really want to do - namely relaxing (58 per cent). As 56 per cent admitted 'adulting' was harder than they expected it to be. I'm a cleaning whizz, using a 15p household item will make your tap shine in minutes And 73 per cent think cooking from scratch each night is an absolute chore, leading a third of them to use a meal prep service. Frive's spokesperson added: 'Modern life has shifted the goalposts, too. 'With the rising cost of living, an unpredictable housing market, and digital overload, the expectations placed on adults today are higher than ever. 'Yet we're still expected to juggle it all with a smile – even when it feels like we're just winging it. 'If we can give them back an hour, with healthy, natural fully prepared meals, that's an act of care.'
The Guardian
36 minutes ago
- The Guardian
Grandparents in the UK: share your experiences of helping with childcare
Whether you do the school run every morning or have your grandchildren to stay for the odd night so that their parents can paint the town red – or catch up on sleep – we want to hear from grandparents in the UK about the ways in which they look after their grandchildren. A recent article in The Atlantic posited that older Americans might be doing more grandparenting than ever – and might be reaching their limit. Yet there is also a reputation that 'boomers' are too busy playing golf, sipping cocktails and 'laughing while their millennial children are suffering' to put in any grunt work with their offspring's offspring. What is the situation like in the UK? We'd like to find out. If you look after your grandchildren for short stints or days at a time, we want to know what type of care you provide, how the arrangement came about, as well as how you feel about it – the benefits as well as any potential downsides. Does it keep you on your toes? Does it feel like a necessity in a country where childcare is often cripplingly expensive? Does it ever, be honest, as much as you love your grandchild, feel like a burden? You can share your experiences of helping with childcare as a grandparent using this form. Please include as much detail as possible. Please include as much detail as possible. Please note, the maximum file size is 5.7 MB. Your contact details are helpful so we can contact you for more information. They will only be seen by the Guardian. Your contact details are helpful so we can contact you for more information. They will only be seen by the Guardian. If you include other people's names please ask them first. If you're having trouble using the form click here. Read terms of service here and privacy policy here.
BreakingNews.ie
an hour ago
- BreakingNews.ie
How to be a good listener when someone is going through a bad time
When someone is going through through a tough time it can be easy to jump straight into problem-solving mode, but sometimes taking a moment to pause and properly listen can be more beneficial. To mark all the amazing work the Samaritans charity does for people in emotional distress ahead of Samaritans Awareness Day (July 24), we want to know how we can become excellent listeners and why this crucial skill is so important. Advertisement We spoke to Lucia Capobianco, learning and development consultant at the Samaritans , who offered some of her top tips on how to brush up on our listening skills. Why is being a good listener important? What impact can it have? 'I think being a good listener has so many benefits,' says Capobianco. 'It allows you to really hear what someone is saying, to pick up on, perhaps, signs and signals that you may not have done.' It also helps build and strengthen connections with others. Listening can help strengthen relationships (Alamy/PA) 'I think it is a wonderful way of building connection, connecting with people, and it really strengthens that, because if you're a good listener, people love to talk to you because they know that you will listen, you will understand, you will give them time,' explains Capobianco. Advertisement Most importantly, the Samaritans charity believes that listening can save lives. 'You never know when listening could save someone's life by giving them that space to talk and get something off their chest and not feel so alone with it,' says Nithiya Gnanathas, media and PR manager at Samaritans. Why is listening – rather than offering advice – so important when someone is going through a tough time? Ask them how they feel (Alamy/PA) 'You often give advice based on what you would do, what you would think, and that may not be appropriate for the person,' says Capobianco. 'It's much better to listen to the person and to encourage them to make their own decisions. 'It's much more powerful to say, what do you want to do? How are you feeling about it? Because that helps keeps that conversation going and will help them open up more.' Advertisement How can we show empathy without necessarily having experienced the same situation? Empathy is about putting yourself in their shoes (Alamy/PA) It's easy to say 'I know how you feel' as a casual remark, but the truth is, we often don't – because everyone is facing their own unique circumstances. 'Empathy is trying to understand how someone feels and putting yourself in their shoes,' says Capobianco. 'It's not about trying to make someone feel better, which is hard, because naturally, especially if it's a friend or a family member, you want to make them feel better, you want them to be okay. But I think empathy is about understanding that that may not be possible. 'So, you don't have to have gone through the same thing as someone to actually really listen to what they're telling you. You just need to take your time and allow them the space to tell you how it is.' What role does body language play in being a good listener? 'Non-verbal things like body language are extremely important in face-to-face situations,' says Capobianco. 'So, it's all about the eye contact, the nodding and making sure you are sitting quite openly. Try to be relaxed and not defensive with your arms and avoid fidgeting or looking at your watch, because that gives the impression perhaps you'd rather be somewhere else.' What are some key listening techniques that people often overlook? View this post on Instagram A post shared by Samaritans (@samaritanscharity) The Samaritans use the SHUSH acronym to share key tips for those looking to improve their listening skills. 'So the S stands for show that you care. So, that's questions like How are you? You don't seem like yourself, fancy a chat? – that kind of thing,' says Capobianco. 'H stands for have patience. It's having patience and giving the person space and time if they do choose to talk. Advertisement 'U stands for use open questions, like how are you feeling? What's going on? And the second S stands for say it back. One of the really powerful things that demonstrates that you're listening, is to reflect things back to the person you're talking to, using their language. For example, if someone says to you I really don't know where things are going, you could say back, you can't keep going like this. 'The final one is H for have courage. Never be afraid to ask someone if they're all right. Those three really simple words can make a heck of a difference to someone, because it gives permission to someone say, no, I'm not okay, can we have a chat? And you can never make it worse.' How can listeners support someone without taking on their emotional burden? 'I think it's really key that you take the time to reflect on the conversation you've had and that you look after yourself,' advises Capobianco. 'I think it's important to remember that you're not responsible for that person or what they do and you can perhaps encourage them to seek professional help if you think that is appropriate. 'You can't take it all on yourself and need to understand that you're not going to fix it. After a tough conversation, do something for yourself. It can be as flippant as making a hot chocolate or a cup of tea, but it's important to take time for some self-care.' Advertisement View this post on Instagram A post shared by Samaritans (@samaritanscharity) You can contact a Samaritans volunteer anytime, day or night, by calling its free helpline at 116 123 or by emailing jo@
