Farewell to a great American warrior with a wacky name

The Herald Scotland

5 days ago

Having read the tributes to the burly chap, we discovered that his given name wasn't actually Hulk, but the slightly less fearsome sounding Terry.
Just as well, really. It would have been rather cruel if his parents had glanced at their cute little baby on the hour of his birth and immediately thought to themselves: 'Yup. Gotta be Hulk.'
And imagine if he hadn't evolved into such an imposing specimen of manhood, yet was genuinely called Hulk… then found himself working as an accountant.
Who amongst us would trust a Hulk to submit our taxes at the end of the fiscal year?
Mr Hogan was a revolutionary figure in the wrestling world because he actually developed muscles.
When he started in the sport his fellow scrappers were more likely to visit a chip shop than spend sweaty hours in the gym.
They preferred battered haddock to battering opponents.
The Diary's scribes are similar to Hulk Hogan, for we are disciplined and dynamic when it comes to unearthing great stories for our readers, as you'll discover while perusing the following classic yarns from our archives…
Stranger danger
A reader buying The Herald overheard a couple who were peering at the small ads in the newsagent's window, with the female declaring: 'There's a three-piece suite here at a good price. In the right colour, too.'
The chap, clearly not keen on the idea, came up with the inspired reply: 'Did your parents not warn you not to take suites from strangers?'
Dead unusual
A funeral director told us he thought he had heard all the unusual music requests for services until he attended a burial where mod band the Jam's Going Underground blasted from the speakers.
Gambling on love
A Glasgow reader driving instructor husband took a foreign student out on a Sunday afternoon.
At the end of the lesson the pupil asked where he could find a bookie.
Her husband's chatty reply that he didn't think they were open on a Sunday, and that his student didn't look like someone who gambled, brought a puzzled look, and the reply: 'It's Valentine's Day. I need to get my wife a bouquet.'
Pilfered plants
A colleague of a Paisley reader retired to a cottage near Dunoon where he planted trees and bushes around his garden, leaving the labels on to help identify them.
Next morning, when he looked out, he saw that rabbits or deer had eaten all the leaves and tender branches.
'Perhaps,' he later told his pals, 'they thought I'd left a menu for them.'
Fuzzy friendship
A reader back from holiday in Texas swears blind that the preacher in the church he attended used the prayer: 'Lord, help me to be the person my dog thinks I am.'