Therapist Mom Shares Simple Phrases She Teaches Her Kids to Stay Safe
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A mom of two has shared the five phrases she's taught her kids to keep them safe.
Colorado-based Andrea Brambila (@brambila_bits) posted a carousel on Instagram outlining the key language tools she's learned counseling kids as a therapist who's "seen too much."
"Are these ground-breaking, earth-shattering phrases? No!" Brambila wrote in her caption. "But they have helped both of my children feel confident advocating for themselves."
Mom Andrea Brambila and her 3-year-old daughter in the kitchen with their backs to the camera.
Mom Andrea Brambila and her 3-year-old daughter in the kitchen with their backs to the camera.
@brambila_bits
"I need some space" is the first phrase her 3-year-old daughter learned to say when she's feeling overwhelmed or frustrated, particularly if she's playing with another child.
It's become a healthy outlet that helps her avoid lashing out physically and instead set boundaries clearly and calmly.
"Clearly asserting her need for space to feel safe and comfortable is a lifelong skill," Brambila wrote on the text overlay.
"I don't keep secrets from mommy and daddy." This phrase, Brambila said, is especially crucial in protecting children from potential grooming by predators who often create secrecy and a false sense of specialness as a way to manipulate their victims.
"Teaching my kids to say out loud that they will not keep secrets in and of itself makes them a less desirable target because it signals that they won't likely keep anything inappropriate to themselves," she explained.
According to Brambila, many children she's worked with have expressed that something felt "off" in how an abuser interacted with them, but they didn't have the language—or confidence—to say so.
Giving kids permission and power to decline uncomfortable interactions by saying: "I don't want to play like that" can be a protective factor.
"I've encouraged my kids from day one to express when they aren't comfortable with someone's behaviors, and my husband and I have shown that we will help them protect their boundaries when needed," Brambila wrote.
Respecting boundaries is also key for her children's safety. "You need to respect my boundaries" is a phrase Brambila often hears from her daughter.
Whether it's another child ignoring her requests for space or a situation where she feels pushed, the mom sees this phrase as a verbal shield her kids can carry into adolescence and beyond.
"Hearing her advocate for herself in this manner will immediately take note, and I hope she'll carry this language with her when she begins dating," she said.
Brambila's post has received over 82,000 likes, and she was praised for her advice in the comments by hundreds of other Instagram users.
"It's so sad we have to do this but all so true. Thank you for these tips. I have two young girls and teaching them the power of their voice is so important in this world," a fellow mom wrote.
"Love this, will be using these for my kids," another user added.
Brambila is clear with her followers and explained that she doesn't live in fear as a parent.
"But when it comes to safety, teaching how to be proactive is always a priority for me," she concluded.
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