'I lost both eyes and my guide dog in one year - then stand-up comedy saved me'

Metro

2 days ago

Sydney May hates X-Factor style sob stories. She also doesn't want any kind of admiration for putting her shoes on the right feet. So if you've come here for that, please gently leave.
What she can say, proudly, is that she's done something many able-bodied people wouldn't allow themselves: stand up on stage and very successfully make people laugh.
So well, in fact, that she's won two gongs this year – including the Comedy Bloomers' LGBTQ new comedian of the year award.
That's a huge achievement for anyone: not just for a blind person.
'People are always like, 'Oh, my God, you're amazing. How do you do that? I couldn't put toast in the toaster if I couldn't see,'' Sydney tells Metro over Zoom.
'I'm like, 'Of course you could..' So it's really nice to be admired for being good at something, and not just good despite the fact that you can't see.'
As a baby, Sydney had retinoblastoma, which is a form of retinal cancer.
'My mum kept saying, 'Something's wrong. She's squinting.' They said, 'Babies always squint'.'
While Sydney had some sight as a baby, she has no memory of being able to see as the cancer quickly took hold.
But it's not all doom and gloom.
'In many ways, I count myself lucky,' Sydney says. 'I had cancer, and the only thing it took was my eyes.
'Some people find the concept of me saying I'm lucky to be a hard one, but I'd say it could have been a hell of a lot worse.'
As per the NHS, Retinoblastoma is a rare type of eye cancer that can affect young children. It affects the retina, which is at the back of the eye.
Retinoblastoma can affect 1 or both eyes.
The main symptom is a white glow or white reflection in the centre of the eye (pupil).
You may be able to see it from just looking at the eye, or you may see it in low light or in photos where a flash has been used.
Other symptoms of retinoblastoma can include: the eyes pointing in a different direction (squint)
the coloured part of the eye (iris) changing colour
swelling around the eye
uncontrolled eye movements
vision problems
pain in 1 or both eyes
Your child may otherwise seem well. Treatment aims to get rid of the cancer, but there is a high chance your child may lose some, or all, of their vision in the affected eye.
But life is not without its struggles, as Sydney experienced a few years ago.
While her eyes did not work, Sydney still had them. But when they began to deteriorate and die, she made the decision to have them removed in what ended up being an 'incredibly painful' post-operation recovery.
She then lost her guide dog of eight years (and she's now three years into a waiting list to get a new one).
This all happened within a 12-month period.
'I'm harder against physical pain than I used to be before,' she says. 'But the emotional stuff I've been through as well has not been fun, and comedy really came at a time when I needed something.
'I didn't know what it was. I just needed something new, and I found it.'
As a blind comedian, Sydney can feel everything on stage. Her senses are heightened to pick up on the atmosphere. https://www.instagram.com/p/DLoa_QhIEer/?hl=en-gb
'It's really important that people laugh. I always say it's no good smiling,' Sydney chuckles.
Sydney thinks it was an advantage in the Comedy Bloomers final that she couldn't see the audiences' faces, which were lit up alarmingly bright for the comedians.
'In a way I think it can be an advantage that I don't have to see the audience, but it does mean I need to feel them,' she says.
'I need to hear them. I guess I'm sensitive to the energy in the room. I need to feel that energy.'
Sydney's favourite rooms are small, intimate venues, where chuckles spread like contagion.
'If it's a big room and they're really far away, you just feel like you're working a bit harder for the laughs,' she says.
If people are disrespectful and talk through shows, that's doubly distracting for Sydney.
'I probably am sensitive to that, but I think all comedians live in fear of the silences and talking. That's everyone, I think,' she says.
What's certain is that while Sydney has only been doing comedy for a year and a half, she's got the on-stage confidence of a veteran.
One question… How?
'I don't get particularly nervous. I just really love it. I just enjoy it. I get massive adrenaline rushes and a huge buzz from doing it,' she says.
While many comedians are guilty of endlessly seeking social validation, it's possible Sydney is made of tougher stuff. Generally speaking.
'I'm not going to say it's more difficult for me than anybody, because everyone has struggles and challenges in life, but I think I've had to develop a fairly thick skin,' she admits. More Trending
Next year, Sydney's goal is Edinburgh. But first she needs to expand her five-minute set.
'There's a lot of comedy related to my blindness, because that's just how life works. But I'm also very, very determined that it will not be the only thing I talk about,' Sydney says.
'There are more aspects to life, and to my life. It's not the only thing to me.'
The Comedy Bloomers' LGBTQ New Comedian of the Year grand final will be broadcast on streaming channel OUTFlix on July 31. Follow Sydney on social media here.
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