Is Working From Home Benefiting Moms — Or Adding To Their Workload?

Forbes

16-06-2025

Work from home mom
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For many, working from home began as a response to a crisis. Now, while many can't imagine their lives without it, for some mothers, it has created a new kind of crisis – one in which they juggle work and family in a never-ending double shift. Scandalous stories of remote workers multitasking two full-time jobs simultaneously don't shock me – I'm a WFM mom.
Long before the Covid-19 pandemic, working remotely with a flexible schedule was one of my top priorities. As a twenty-something in the 2010s, I enjoyed the freedom to travel and work at hours when I felt most productive. Then, after I gave birth to my daughter in 2022 as a single mom, working from home was essential for me to be able to thrive in both my career and as a parent, especially as a sole caregiver. I know that I could make a higher income in a more traditional role, but for my situation, the flexibility is well worth the trade-off. Many moms agree. But, I have to wonder – although working from home allows us to 'have it all,' do we end up instead 'doing it all' and taking on even more responsibilities?
During the pandemic, moms in heterosexual two-parent families more often shouldered the child care and helped with virtual schooling, even when both parents were working from home. 64 percent of mothers said they were responsible for the majority of child care and only 35 percent of fathers, according to a May 2020 poll. Even when children are physically in the classroom, most work schedules do not match up with school calendars, creating gaps during school breaks as well as afternoons and sick days.
Post-pandemic, moms are still taking on more of that care, according to a 2022 Pew Research Center survey, which reported that 78 percent of mothers in two-parent households say they do more when it comes to managing their children's schedules and activities. Another study researching those family dynamics found that both men and women did more housework and child care when they worked from home, but women did proportionally more, even when they had similar work situations. And women who worked from home felt more guilt about conflicting work-family priorities than women who worked in a traditional environment.
Likely, you don't need statistics or data from research studies to understand these perspectives. Being a working mom isn't easy, whether you're in an office or working from home. But the inclination to take on ever-increasing responsibilities at home can perpetuate a cycle in which WFM mom are handling so many family and household tasks that they couldn't go back to the office even if they wanted to – at least not without a dramatic redistribution of the work of the home.
That's because working from home does free up a substantial amount of time. According to a 2023 study, American workers saved an average of 72 minutes a day by removing the commute to an office. Post-pandemic remote work policies are also credited with keeping more moms in the workforce. On the surface, the advantages of WFH for mothers are undeniable. In addition to saving time commuting, remote work typically with additional flexibility, such as the ability to attend school events. But, just because we can now 'do it all' – is it taking its toll?
In addition to the hours of household responsibilities that women take on, it's important to also consider the mental load of balancing home and work priorities simultaneously. As Dr. Regina Lark, author of 'Emotional Labor: Why A Woman's Work is Never Done and What To Do About It,' writes in her book, it is the remembering, reminding, planning, noticing and anticipating that is the invisible work of mental and emotional labor.
Dr. Lark gives an example during a phone interview. 'It's not just about making dinner; it's about planning family meals, checking the fridge and pantry to see what you already have and should use, creating a shopping list, purchasing groceries, coordinating family schedules to determine the right time to serve dinner that evening and planning backwards to create a timeline for preparation, cooking and then noticing how each member of the family seems to like the meal to adjust for next time. 'Making dinner' might just sound like one simple task, but it's really an entire project to be overseen.'
While individual household tasks may seem small when looked at in silo, additional workload at home leads to decreased productivity at work. A Pew study on working parents showed that 23 percent of working moms (versus 15 percent of working dads) report having turned down a promotion due to juggling work and parenting responsibilities. Wage gaps and career advancement have long-term consequences, as well as furthering the sentiment that there just isn't enough time to do everything that needs to be done. Dr. Lark remarks, "The blurring of boundaries between professional and personal spaces has led to many women working longer hours and still not complete their 'to do' list.'
So, what is the solution? Every family has different needs and priorities, there is no one-size-fits-all solution. For myself, a solo parent, it may mean preemptively setting boundaries on where I'll spend my time. I take care of my daughter when she's home sick, but find alternative child care during planned breaks to make sure my work isn't disrupted. I intentionally save my household chores for when my daughter is with me and let her 'help' with the laundry and dishes, so I'm not as distracted by these tasks while I'm working.
For WFM mothers with opposite sex partners, Dr. Lark suggests having intentional conversations about sharing all the work of the household. 'Modern households have transformed dramatically, yet the work of running a home still falls disproportionately to women. Women and men need deliberate dialogues to make visible the invisible work of the home by discussing what needs to happen on a daily, weekly, monthly, yearly and occasional basis. Often, one partner thinks they've shared their overwhelm in those moments of frustration, but by having a calm conversation through the course of the relationship -- without blame or resentment -- and simply talk about the work, you can much more effectively create a plan for change."
It isn't all on men to step up. Dr. Lark shares that women often struggle with the transition as well. "For women, sometimes the hardest part of letting go of some of this work is the worry that their partner won't do the task as well as they are. And that is likely true. Radical delegation is difficult, but it's the only way to achieve true parity in the home."