
Rugby fan aims to tackle the 'man up' culture
Alex, originally from Wirksworth, Derbyshire, left school with no qualifications but started working in heavy industry in quarrying and mineral processing.He did well and became works director at one company but while his career thrived, he was secretly battling poor mental health along the way.
"You just bottle it up and I had some unhealthy coping mechanisms," he told the BBC.That struggle continued until his late 30s and early 40s - and when his coping mechanisms did not work anymore, he said he attempted to take my own life. "There was all sorts of strange things happening - lots of noise and dark thoughts and you just put it down to being tired, overworking or family pressures, finances, there's always an excuse," he said."It never once occurred to me this was a mental health illness... there's always something going on you can throw in the mix to try and deviate from what's actually going on... I lived like this for a very long time... no-one ever spoke about it."I was [told to man up] and I kind of did it because that's how life was. "But it does mask what's going on because you do put a front on it and you hide it... even now I'll still get people that I've known for a long time that didn't know what I was going through."
The father-of-three said he joined the charity during an intensely dark period in his life, not long after the organisation was set up by RAF veteran Stu Bratt. Mr Bratt started the charity after two of his friends took their own lives in the space of four days of each other."He soon realised they were anything but weak and selfish and he looked into it and realised that it's us, that we hid this behind the man up culture and used the stigma as an excuse not to share how we were talking about," Alex said."I saw his message and I reached out, Stu supported me through my journey."He decided to give back to the charity and volunteered for more than three years before being invited to go full-time with them.The organisation aims to promote positive conversations around mental health, focusing on male-dominated spaces. Asked what advice he'd give to anyone going through a tough time, Alex said: "Talking is my go-to, talk to a friend, a family member, even your employer."They do care, they will look after you but be honest with yourself and do what you can achieve. "It's an illness that you're living with, it's not a weakness... if you need time to recover from a physical injury, you need time for your mind to cover."
If you have been affected by any of the issues in this story, support is available via the BBC Action Line.
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