State police cruiser struck on I-95 in New Haven
The incident took place around 6:30 a.m. in the area of Exit 48 in New Haven.
Crews respond to multiple Saturday morning crashes in Brookfield
State police said the cruiser was struck after being parked in a construction pattern.
Minor injuries were reported.
It is unclear what caused the accident.
Copyright 2025 Nexstar Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.
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Yahoo
19 minutes ago
- Yahoo
The Biggest Obstacle To Repairing a Parent and Adult-Child Relationship, Psychologist Says
The Biggest Obstacle To Repairing a Parent and Adult-Child Relationship, Psychologist Says originally appeared on Parade. Preparing for a baby, having a newborn and then raising a child are big milestones. There are so many books on what to expect with you're expecting, and now there are tons of child psychologists available on social media to help you navigate parenting your child. But what a lot of people don't talk about is what happens after the child turns 18 and is ready to leave the nest. 'I have to honestly say that while we have an entire industry and culture around becoming parents, no one really talks about how incredibly painful, challenging and also exciting it is when our children no longer need us in the same way they did when they were young,' Dr. Kim Sage, PsyD, MA, a licensed clinical psychologist in California, tells Parade. As she points out, there are a lot of emotions—some conflicting—when your child becomes an adult and your relationship is required to change. In addition to your now-adult child requiring different things from you, they are also no longer a "child," and you have to transform how you operate with each other in terms of needs and expectations. When it comes to what parents should know about kids getting older and how to cultivate a positive parent-adult-child relationship with them, Dr. Sage shares a modified quote she uses with her patients. It's a great way to keep things in perspective because you only get 18 years with your child as a kid.'If you are lucky enough to live a long life, and if your children are as well, you will spend the majority of your life knowing your children as adults, much longer than you will know them as children,' the quote says that it's important to really steer through their adolescence with that in mind. 'So, try to build a foundation in childhood upon which you can create a healthy and loving adult relationship,' she Dr. Sage's expertise, we discover what the biggest obstacles are to , how a parent can start to repair a relationship that's gone sour and what compromises likely need to be made. Related: Reasons Why Parent and Adult-Child Relationships Can Become Strained There are, of course, an endless number of situations out there that result in a strained relationship between parents and their adult children. Dr. Sage, who has four adult children of her own (and over 590k followers on TikTok), names a handful of reasons why you might be feeling tension in your own family. Unresolved pain and trauma from childhood, along with a lack of repair and acknowledgment from the parent. A lack of parental self-awareness and evolution into themselves, and engaging in new roles as "adult-to-adult" as opposed to 'adult-to-child' Unrealistic expectations, demands to be seen as "the parent" without acknowledging the adult child and a lack of respect. Know that "just because you are the parent' doesn't entitle you to violate boundaries, speak disrespectfully, etc. Emotionally immature parents, parents with untreated trauma, parents who struggle with untreated Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), etc. Poor communication: too much advice, judgment, lack of empathy, "I know better'-isms Boundary violations Refusal to accept a child for who they are as a person, partner and parent (for example, if a child or grandchild is part of the LGBTQ+ community and isn't accepted, how your child parents their own kids, if you're not making efforts to accept their lifestyle, beliefs, partner, job, etc.) Generational differences, cultural differences and refusing to see it from your adult child's perspective, being unwilling to evolve and change Mental illness, substance abuse Using money, help and/or care to control children who need help so you can maintain control or power in the relationship, make demands, etc. The Biggest Obstacle To Repairing a Parent/Adult-Child Relationship While those are some common reasons for an injured relationship, Dr. Sage shares that the biggest obstacle for parents and their adult kids has to do with the parents' inability to evolve and mold to new chapters in life.'What I have found over the years is that the greatest obstacle is in getting parents—from different generations, with different childhoods and traumas—to be open, willing and flexible enough to tolerate deeply painful emotions in what feels like 'a failure' when their adult children try to address wounds and grievances in the relationship,' she shares. She explains that she has seen 'incredible healing' in her line of work, but she's also seen 'pain that will never be validated,' and there's a lot of 'real work' to be done on both sides. This inability to change or understand where their kids are coming from can also be linked to parents who are emotionally immature or who have untreated issues such as narcissism, NPD and more. Any parent, but especially those in these camps, can find it very difficult to hear they 'didn't get it right at times,' Dr. Sage says. These feelings act as 'facts' to them that 'supersede their ability to look at themselves in an open and honest light.' 'So instead, they defend, invalidate, blame, punish or gaslight their adult children,' she continues. 'They lack self-awareness, and it's just too painful. So this cycle of invalidation and lack of repair often sets the stage for distant, toxic or no-contact relationships, especially when their adult children are really doing the work on themselves to heal and evolve from their childhood and adulthood experiences.'For those instances where parents just can't seem to come to terms with their 'very human imperfections' and 'evolve in order to heal or maintain' communication with their adult children, Dr. Sage shares that those connections may never improve. Why?'Because their parents just cannot tolerate the deeply uncomfortable emotions it brings up in them,' she explains. Related: How To Overcome Obstacles in a Parent/Adult-Child Relationship So, now that you know why certain things can affect relationships with children in adulthood, you might also want to know how to overcome these obstacles. In addition to professional help with therapy, Dr. Sage says one of the first things is just acknowledging that you need to be 'open and willing to evolve from 'being parents of children' to 'becoming parents of adult children.'' As she mentioned before, not as many people really talk about what it's like to have a child grow up, and how to navigate through that part of their (and your) life. However, that doesn't mean that your kids don't need you at all.'Most of the time, they still need us and can benefit from what we have to offer,' Dr. Sage points out. 'But in order for it to work, both adult child and parent have to separate a bit from the roles we once shared. We both have to evolve into something new.'To do this, you need to understand four key things: 1. Every child is different, and so is their experience Maybe you had multiple children, and only one of them feels a certain way about how their childhood played out, including how they were treated as kids. While your knee-jerk reaction might be that they're full of it, know that this can happen. And their experience and feelings are valid.'Each of our children had a different experience of us as their parents, even if they were born close to other siblings, and even if they grew up in the same household,' Dr. Sage says. 'Why? Because each child brings up different parts of our own childhood, each child has a different temperament, mood, set of strengths and challenges, etc. No two children are the exact same, and it's impossible to be the exact same parent to different people.'Invalidating a child who comes to you as an adult with experiences such as this can easily push them away. 2. Validate your child's experiences On a similar note, validating your kid's experience in their youth, including the emotions they carry with it, is important to creating a good connection with them as you both get older. 'It's important to honor and validate their unique experiences of childhood (not just the version we remember or the version we longed for it to be),' Dr. Sage shares. 'This means validating their thoughts and feelings when they share them with us, even when it hurts or triggers our sense of failure or trauma.' Nobody's perfect, as Hannah Montana once said. So stop trying to pretend your parent was. 'They don't need us to be perfect, they need us to listen, be open to making repairs, take responsibility and respect their requests for a new version of connection,' she 3. Let go of your expectations for their life/adulthood If you're the planning type or Type A, it can be hard to not expect things from the future, and for them to turn out how you want them to. When it comes to living, breathing human beings (which your children are), it's important not to put them in a box and accept reality. Not a dream. 'Sometimes we have to do the work of facing and grieving the life we wanted for ourselves and for our kids, and be willing to say, 'I am sorry I didn't get this right. I am sorry things were so hard for you,'' Dr. Sage explains. 'Or even, 'I am sorry that there were just things I didn't understand and couldn't help you with.' Being willing to model that we really did try our best—but sometimes we still didn't get it right—empowers and models for our children what it looks like to love imperfectly.' She says, 'If we can be imperfect parents and people, so can our children.''Even with all the best intentions in the world, parenting is the hardest job in the world—and it never ends,' she adds. 4. Validate and feel your own emotions (sometimes away from your kids) Part of this process of fixing a strained relationship is also honoring your own emotions. Just like the fact that you're not perfect, you're not a robot either.'If you're a parent, give yourself permission to feel whatever you feel and find someone safe to talk to about it,' Dr. Sage says. 'It doesn't necessarily have to be a conversation you have with your kids.' For example, Dr. Sage—who, again, has four adult kids—spoke to her own therapist about 'teenage' battles she was having with her children. Turns out, they were attempts by her kids to 'separate from' her, 'not attempts to hurt [her] intentionally.' 'When I saw it from a developmental perspective, it was less painful,' Dr. Sage explains. 'You're allowed to be upset, disappointed, hurt, etc., too, as a parent, but working this out with safe, trusted friends, therapists, is much healthier before you try to express what you are feeling with your child.' While it can be a hard trap to avoid, she reminds us that kids are not your therapists, even as they hit adulthood. So while it's important to work through what you're feeling, it doesn't always involve your child, especially if you're still figuring out what it all means. 'Even when you are extremely close to your adult child, remember that no matter how mature they are, to a point, you are and always will be their parent and someone they look to be a safe harbor,' she explains. Related: How Can a Parent Start Repairing Their Relationship With Their Child? As Dr. Sage mentioned, working on yourself as the parent is the first step if you have a broken or strained relationship with your child (adult or otherwise). Through therapy and self-reflection, you will learn how to cultivate self-awareness and self-compassion, while also pinpointing what triggers you and what trauma you have from your own childhood or life. 'It helps us to be compassionate with ourselves when our kids tell us we aren't getting it right (enough) if we know how to own our own stories, mistakes, etc., while also learning to be more empathic and kind to ourselves,' she says. 'Therapy, books, podcasts [and] groups can all be so helpful.'Knowing something is broken is the first step and, oftentimes, that can come with therapy and working on yourself. 'Beginning with the premise that most broken adult relationships are not because adult kids can't let go of the past when parents own it, but because parents are still doing harmful things in adulthood with their adult children,' she explains. Related: Where Should Compromises Be Made? In the end, parents have to be intentional about healing their relationship with their children. Dr. Sage says that working on yourself while doing the hard work to maintain a relationship is key to repairing a bond between you and your adult kids. Children should also feel like you're validating their emotions, growing and reciprocating work (not 'punishing them forever'). 'You will always be allowed to feel whatever you feel, but if they are doing the work, it's important to move toward healing together on both sides,' she every connection you have, compromises are inevitable and, oftentimes, are essential to keep a lasting relationship—even between parents and adults. Dr. Sage says that parents need to take into account that they probably need to make more compromises than their kids.'All relationships require some compromise, but if your adult child is coming to you to try to heal, I believe it takes more concessions on the parent side,' she shares. 'We are always the parents, no matter the age of our children. We've already set the stage and standard for what love, healing, compassion, connection and forgiveness look like.' Compromises should be made when: So what compromises can and should be made? Dr. Sage shares that issues such as these should have compromises that 'need to be respected and agreed upon.' How often you talk to your kids How long and when they visit How you "grandparent" (generally!) 'This doesn't mean you have to do everything perfectly, but blatant disregard for your adult child's requests will never serve the relationship well and in many cases, can be the final blow,' she explains. Compromises should not be made about: Even though concessions need to be made in relationships, there are certain instances where there are no compromises to be made. It's just a complete 'yes or no,' 'do or do not' situation. 'Lack of respect, boundary violations, name-calling, gaslighting, abuse, control, etc., are not issues in which we should compromise as adult children,' she says. Other situations that your child should not compromise on: If you (the parent) continually disrespect or violate requests and/or boundaries. Your relationship or a situation is making your child deeply stressed, sick and increasing their mental health symptoms. Problems on your end have been going on for years, and nothing has changed. If name-calling, abuse, harassment, accusations and emotionally/physically abusive behaviors don't stop. If you continually disregard who they are and/or refuse to accept them. It's a conditional relationship, a controlling relationship that includes things like gaslighting, narcissistic and toxic traits. If your child 'throws in the towel,' so to speak, it likely means that they have set boundaries, communicated their desires and tried to compromise with you—their parent—and feel as though they are not being respected or heard. This can lead to your child choosing to go no-contact with you. As Dr. Sage mentions, she has never seen someone do this 'without years of contemplation and struggle beforehand.' 'It's usually been years of pain and hurt, failed attempts, disregard of needs and requests that have caused so much pain that their adult child feels that for their own safety, mental health and peace of mind, it is their only option,' she explains. So if your adult child goes no-contact with you, those are typically the reasons Ultimately, Healing a Relationship With Your Adult Child *Is* Possible Even though it can feel impossible and like there are so many things you need to do in order to fix your relationship with your adult child, just know that it is possible. And it's so worth it in the long run. The final sentiment that Dr. Sage shares with us is a quote that she's 'tried to hold inside [her] heart' since all four of her own kids are grown. It's from the poem 'On Children' by Kahlil Gibran, a Lebanese-American writer, poet and visual artist. It says: 'Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you yet they belong not to you."Remember that as a parent, you might have birthed and raised your kids, but they are their own people and will grow into their own identities. But that doesn't mean you don't still have duties as a parent. 'At the end of the day, just like us, our adult children want to be seen, loved and accepted for exactly who they are,' Dr. Sage says. 'Not who you want them to be.'Up Next:Source: Kim Sage, PsyD, MA, is a licensed clinical psychologist in California and has a large social media following. Through her TikTok (590k followers), Instagram (77.5k followers) and YouTube (317k subscribers), Dr. Sage makes content about parents with emotional immaturity, narcissistic and borderline personality disorders, autism in women and more. She also has four courses (one is free) available that revolve around identifying your childhood trauma and learning how to heal from it. The Biggest Obstacle To Repairing a Parent and Adult-Child Relationship, Psychologist Says first appeared on Parade on Jul 16, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Jul 16, 2025, where it first appeared. Solve the daily Crossword
Fox News
21 minutes ago
- Fox News
Duo on pretrial release allegedly lead police on high-speed chase after retail theft
Two Chicago women allegedly led police on a high-speed chase after stealing clothes from a retail store while on pretrial release for theft-related charges, according to authorities. The DuPage County States Attorney's Office said 38-year-old Shawanda Outlaw and 27-year-old Destiny Jackson have been charged with single counts of burglary and retail theft, as well as two counts of aggravated fleeing and eluding a police officer. The Oak Brook Police Department responded to a report of a burglary/retail theft at 12:30 p.m. Monday, to review footage of the theft. Responding officers spoke with the loss prevention officer and reviewed security footage, and it is alleged that Jackson and Outlaw entered the store, picked out 18 items of clothing worth $1,674, and went to the fitting room. Once in the fitting room, the pair allegedly put the clothing on their bodies in layers and left the store without paying for the merchandise, the state's attorney's office said. Later that day, an officer with the Oak Brook Police Department spotted Jackson and Outlaw in a blue Nissan and activated the emergency lights and sirens to conduct a traffic stop. But instead of pulling over, the driver, later identified as Jackson, allegedly drove off at a high rate of speed. Jackson allegedly led police on a high-speed chase, swerving in and out of traffic while also using the shoulder to pass vehicles on multiple occasions. She is also accused of driving into oncoming traffic near a hospital to avoid slower-moving vehicles. Police reported that the officer reached speeds of up to 82 mph, though she was not able to gain ground on the Nissan. Jackson eventually drove onto Interstate 290, where her vehicle was boxed in with assistance from the Chicago Police Department. Police also allege that the two suspects threw merchandise from the store out of the windows while fleeing police. Jackson and Outlaw were ultimately arrested at the scene. The state attorney's office said Outlaw appeared in court Monday morning, and during the hearing the court denied a request to detain the suspect pretrial. But following the hearing, the state filed additional motions to revoke Outlaw's pretrial release because of pending cases alleging she stole merchandise from two other stores on three separate occasions. Judge Daniel Guerin and Judge Mia McPherson granted the motions. Jackson is currently on parole for aggravated battery to a police officer and retail theft from 2023, yet she was on pre-trial release in Will County for another retail theft case. During Jackson's pretrial hearing on Monday afternoon, Judge Joshua Dieden granted the state's request for pretrial detention. Jackson is scheduled to appear in court on Aug. 11, while Outlaw is scheduled to appear Aug. 26. DuPage County State's Attorney Robert Berlin accused Outlaw and Jackson of thumbing their noses at the criminal justice system and allegedly committing another crime while on pre-trial release. "To further aggravate the matter, it is also alleged that in an attempt to avoid apprehension, the two defendants led authorities on a high-speed chase in the middle of the day, endangering the police officers involved, other motorists, pedestrians and shoppers along the way," Berlin said. "In DuPage County we have zero tolerance for the type of behavior alleged in this case. The new charges against these women, who were both previously granted pretrial release, illustrates the need for changes to the State's Safe-T-Act to give judges more discretion at First Appearance Court. "Too often, we are seeing repeat offenders released pre-trial because the Act does not allow judges to use their discretion for certain offenses." The Safety, Accountability, Fairness and Equity-Today (SAFE-T) Act, which took effect on Jan. 1, 2023, overhauled Illinois' justice system with provisions that granted more freedoms to defendants and reduced certain felonies to misdemeanors. It also lowered the severity of some misdemeanors, like trespassing, and eliminated cash bail across the state. The SAFE-T Act's most controversial provision, abolishing cash bail, was delayed due to legal challenges over its constitutionality, but the Illinois Supreme Court ultimately ruled in favor of the reform. It took effect Sept. 18, 2023, making Illinois the first state to fully eliminate cash bail.
CNN
21 minutes ago
- CNN
Haberman reacts to the firing of Comey's daughter, a prosecutor in Epstein case
CNN's Kaitlan Collins talks with Maggie Haberman about reports that Maurene Comey, a federal prosecutor in Manhattan and the daughter of former FBI Director James Comey, has been fired from her job in the Southern District of New York.
