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How Do You Raise Good Kids in a Terrifying World? Author Melinda Wenner Moyer Has Ideas

How Do You Raise Good Kids in a Terrifying World? Author Melinda Wenner Moyer Has Ideas

Yahoo29-05-2025

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If you're a parent raising kids in today's world — and feeling increasingly panicked about the prospect of preparing your offspring for… well, everything that the 21st century is going to throw at them, you're not alone.
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That's one bit of good news. The other is that there is now a practical guide to help you figure it all out: Hello, Cruel World! Science-Based Strategies for Raising Terrific Kids in Terrifying Times, by award-winning journalist and 'Now What?' Substack author Melinda Wenner Moyer. The book is divided into three sections — Cope, Connect, and Cultivate — and covers 10 tricky parenting topics, from the evergreen (like fostering self-compassion and setting kids up for healthy friendships) to the thoroughly modern, like encouraging media literacy and managing tech and social media. In each, Wenner Moyer interviews experts and delves into research to provide practical — and hopeful — advice, and all from the POV of a parent who's going through it right alongside us.
Wenner Moyer herself is the parent of a 14-year-old and a 10-year-old, and the book is as valuable for parents of tweens and teens as it is for those who are at an earlier stage of their parenting journey. At SheKnows, we'll be covering Wenner Moyer's takeaways for older kids, starting with our free, in-person event, SK Conversations: Hello, Cruel World!, taking place on Thursday, May 29th. If you're in the New York City area, RSVP to join us! And stay tuned for a video recap of the event and additional insights.
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My Extreme Postpartum Anxiety Convinced Me My Baby's Life Was in Danger—Here's What Helped
My Extreme Postpartum Anxiety Convinced Me My Baby's Life Was in Danger—Here's What Helped

Yahoo

time18 hours ago

  • Yahoo

My Extreme Postpartum Anxiety Convinced Me My Baby's Life Was in Danger—Here's What Helped

If you purchase an independently reviewed product or service through a link on our website, SheKnows may receive an affiliate commission. 'If I fall asleep, she'll die in the middle of the night.' More from SheKnows We Just Found the *Cutest* Dog Bed That Looks Straight Out of a LoveShackFancy Catalog (& It's Only $30!) Today's Top Deals How Do You Raise Good Kids in Terrifying Times? 'Hello, Cruel World' Author Melinda Wenner Moyer Has Ideas Think Spring! Target Just Added Tons of Gorgeous New Patio Items Target Is Having a Can't-Miss Spring Sandal Sale for Circle Members 'I must set the temperature to exactly 70 degrees, even though it's August and will cost a million dollars; if I don't, she will suffocate and die.' 'If I go to Target alone, my husband will drop her and she'll have brain damage.' 'Holding her is dangerous, because I could swipe her delicate, paper mâché-esque head against the doorway.' 'If I let anyone near her, they'll infect her with a brain-eating virus after ignoring my pleas to never kiss her on the mouth' 'Driving to the grocery store is out of the question—what if I get into a car accident and die, and she'll be left motherless?' 'If I sleep, that means she's growing up without me already. Even when I hold her, I miss her.' Welcome to the inside of my emotionally feral postpartum brain, a place I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemies. Days after giving birth to my daughter this past summer, I was sucker-punched with seemingly endless waves of intense sadness and anxiety. 'Baby blues' is what the birthing classes warned us about: temporary heightened feelings likely caused by hormonal fluctuations post-child birth that effect up to 80 percent of new moms. How could the best thing to have ever happened to me also feel like the worst? Our mission at SheKnows is to empower and inspire women, and we only feature products we think you'll love as much as we do. This article was sponsored by BetterHelp, however, all products were independently selected by our editors. Please note that if you purchase something by clicking on a link within this story, we may receive a small commission of the sale. 'Ah, baby blues – sounds cute right? And honestly, who isn't a bit down after the massive physical journey your body takes? Baby blues are short, fleeting, physical responses to the experience of childbirth that impact somewhere between 50-80 percent of new moms,' Donna S. Sheperis, PhD and board certified telemental health provider, tells SheKnows. However, she warns if 'intense' feelings are still there after a couple weeks, 'that is more likely to be postpartum depression.' Sheperis says. 'Moms may withdraw from people they love or have feelings of guilt or that they shouldn't be around anymore. Actively suicidal thoughts can occur. Relatedly, postpartum anxiety shows in those early weeks or months by an excessive amount of worry that includes racing and persistent thoughts that the baby isn't safe or that something bad will happen. These thoughts also create problems ranging from general feelings of restlessness all the way to panic.' The fact that I was still experiencing ruthless anxiety about my daughter for weeks after she was born signaled to me that something wasn't right. I made an appointment with my therapist and took the call from my bed, with my baby sleeping right next to me in her bassinet. Telehealth therapy services like BetterHelp (which I've used for years) give people an accessible lifeline when they need help—fast. check out betterhelp I remember telling my therapist exactly what I was thinking, fear by fear, and as I said the words out loud I felt their power dissipate. 'I'm just so worried she'll get SIDS. We practice safe sleeping, we keep the room way too cold, and we don't smoke — but I'm still sticking my finger under her nostrils to make sure she's still breathing every thirty minutes. Even at night,' I confessed to her. We unpackaged the fear of SIDS together. How statistically it was so, so unlikely. How I was already doing everything in my control to prevent it. How my lack of sleep was actually more dangerous than the fear that was keeping me awake. I'm 10 months postpartum, and I still have PPA — but it's more manageable now, thanks to therapy. I can talk myself out of intrusive thoughts and reason with myself. Therapy gives me the tools to do that. The thing about becoming a parent, is that it's all so new — and it happens all at once. I read all the books and took all the classes, and I was still overwhelmed. Overwhelmed by how much effort it takes to care for a tiny human, as well as the psychological toll it would take on me. I knew I would love my baby, but I didn't realize that this kind of love could actually be painful because of how tremendous and all-encompassing it is. Plus, the hormones were making me feel irrational to the next level. I should be able to fall asleep without fearing for my daughter's life. Therapy helped me feel less alone and guided me in how I processed all my new feelings. Check out betterhelp 'Therapy can make a difference by addressing how your thoughts contribute to the experience. Therapy can normalize this part of life so that you don't feel alone in your experience as a mom to a new baby,' Sheperis tells SheKnows. 'Therapy provides the emotional support and validation to allow for the adjustment to adding a new baby to your life. Specifically we see therapy from a Cognitive Behavioral (CBT) or Interpersonal (IPT) approach being effective in helping moms address the depressive and anxious symptoms.' It's actually (statistically) effective, too. 'Something helpful to note is that with treatment, about 80 percent of moms get better!' Sheperis notes. BetterHelp has a lot of features that make therapy way more accessible for new mothers especially. If I had to schedule an in-person appointment freshly postpartum, there is no way I would go. Aside from literally still wearing a diaper and refusing to put on real clothes, summoning the energy to leave the house was only reserved for my daughter's check-ups. After taking a short questionnaire, you'll be matched with a therapist who meets your individualized needs. If that person doesn't work out, you can go back and choose another provider (and you can do this until you've found the right person for you). Once you've found a therapist you gel with, scheduling sessions is as easy as booking time on someone's Google calendar. No receptionist or complicated scheduling process included. I used BetterHelp's chat feature a lot. It feels a lot like unloading via text message to a friend, but instead of a friend, it's someone who's trained to actually help you. The feature allows you to privately type out messages to your therapist, who has 24 hours to get back to you. I did this along with video sessions. Especially during bad mental health weeks, I'd message my therapist several times a day — it really felt like I had someone in my corner 24/7. Classes like Setting Boundaries: The Power of the Door, Narcissistic Personality Disorder: When Self-Love Is Not Love, and Understanding and Living With Depressive Disorders are offered through BetterHelp's Classes feature. This isn't something I've personally tried, but my therapist has offered it to me and says it's helpful for many folks. You can schedule sessions with your therapist via phone or video, as well as live chat, either on your desktop or with your phone via the BetterHelp app. Since I already regularly go to therapy and have consistently for four years, I knew that it would be a part of my postpartum care practice. I made my first appointment with my therapist about a week and half after giving birth, and my provider was really flexible and worked around my wacky new life/schedule. But for folks who've never tried therapy and are wondering if it's for them after giving birth: I can just personally say it was critical for my own wellbeing as a new mom. 'Going back to the perfectly normal experience of the baby blues — if those feelings persist for more than a couple of weeks or if you begin to think about dying, suicide, or other harm, therapy is an important step,' Sheperis says. 'And don't forget that these symptoms may not show up for awhile. New moms may feel a sort of high postpartum due to the physical and emotional changes and their excitement at having a baby! There may be symptoms that pop up a couple of months after the birth and you may not think they have anything to do with having a baby!' Sheperis adds, 'We may become more irritable or snap at loved ones. We may withdraw from things and people that usually make us happy. Therapy at this point is very successful at addressing the symptoms so they do not persist.' I found that not only did therapy help me, but it helped me be more present with my daughter. Instead of just staring at her and crying while we both watch Ms. Rachel on YouTube and survive the day, I was able to take her to the park for a stroll. I smiled at her and we did tummy time. I sang a thousand variations of 'The Wheels on the Bus,' which she adores. Sheperis tells me that the reason for this change is that 'moms who are more mentally healthy have better physical and emotional bonding with their babies — so the health of the new mom helps the health and well being of baby as well.' These days, the fears come and go, and the anxiety rarely gets so unruly. Will she fall and bruise herself as she learns to walk? Could happen. Will I miss her first words? Hopefully not, but I'll be around for others. Will she grow up and decide to go to college across the country and leave me forever? Maybe, but for now she's within arm's reach and I'm doing everything in my control to keep her safe and happy. When the anxieties spiral to another dimension, I have the tools I learned in therapy to reel 'em back to planet earth. : PhD and board certified telemental health provider, professor and chair, Department of Counseling More Top Deals from SheKnows Is Walmart+ Worth It? 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Trump Officials Met with Walmart on Direct-to-Patient Drug Sales
Trump Officials Met with Walmart on Direct-to-Patient Drug Sales

Bloomberg

time19 hours ago

  • Bloomberg

Trump Officials Met with Walmart on Direct-to-Patient Drug Sales

US health officials met with with Walmart Inc. and other retailers this week as part of an effort to help Americans get their medicines more directly from companies that make them, according to people familiar with the talks. The conversations between the Trump administration and experts from the nascent straight-to-consumer drug industry are intended to explore streamlining the way Americans get their medicines, said the people, who weren't authorized to speak publicly on the matter.

The Unhealthiest Canned Pastas You Should Avoid At All Costs
The Unhealthiest Canned Pastas You Should Avoid At All Costs

Yahoo

timea day ago

  • Yahoo

The Unhealthiest Canned Pastas You Should Avoid At All Costs

Let's get this out of the way -- canned pasta is probably never going to be as healthy (or as tasty) as your mom's homemade spaghetti. Still, because of its undeniably convenient qualities, most of us have probably picked up a can or two of processed pasta without thinking too much about it. Though it's totally fine to chow down on a bowl or two of canned pasta every now and again, doing so too often could mean trouble for your health. As you may already know, most Americans eat too much salt, and the regular consumption of processed food options such as canned pasta only makes matters worse. But it isn't just the sodium that poses a threat to your health. Other components, including added sugar and various additives, often make an appearance in canned pasta, making this easy-to-grab meal one of the canned food options you should absolutely avoid at all costs. Worried? Don't be. We rounded up some of the unhealthiest canned pasta options on store shelves in an effort to help you navigate the tricky waters of canned, heavily processed food. We're breaking down the ingredients and highlighting some of the most concerning nutrition facts per can so you can make the best decisions possible for your health and wellness. Join us as we unveil the unhealthiest canned pastas on store shelves. Read more: The 14 Most Unhealthy Canned Soups You Can Buy At The Store The American Heart Association recommends that most people consume no more than 2,300 milligrams of sodium per day, with the preferred daily limit being no more than 1,500 milligrams. It should come as no surprise, then, that Great Value Pasta Rings & Meatballs in Tomato Sauce isn't going to do you any favors in achieving this goal. At a whopping 1,050 milligrams per can, consuming this canned pasta could have you inching closer to your daily sodium limit in just a bowl or two. At the time of writing, Great Value Pasta Rings & Meatballs in Tomato Sauce costs less than $1 per 15-ounce can, which, like many of the options on this list, is quite the bargain. Regardless, this pick is not only loaded with sodium but features other concerning nutritional aspects of note, including high sugar content. Yes, believe it or not, Great Value Pasta Rings & Meatballs in Tomato Sauce contains added sugar -- and lots of it, at 10 grams per can. For reference, that's roughly the same amount of sugar you'd consume in a Dum-Dums lollipop. There's even high fructose corn syrup in the mix, which is a controversial sweetener that's been linked to an increased risk of obesity and health issues such as fatty liver disease and type 2 diabetes when consumed in excess. Another Walmart contender sporting less-than-stellar nutritional stats, the Great Value Macaroni in Tomato & Beef Sauce features tubular noodles drenched in a beefy, tomatoey, and very salty sauce. This 15-ounce can of pasta includes 1,230 milligrams of sodium per can, which is more than half of the maximum amount we're recommended to consume in an entire day. Though Great Value Macaroni in Tomato & Beef Sauce doesn't quite feature as much added sugar as Great Value Pasta Rings & Meatballs in Tomato Sauce at 5 grams per can, it does still contain high fructose corn syrup, which can spell trouble for your health when consumed too often. Other additives, such as potassium chloride and modified food starch, also make their appearance in this Walmart-branded macaroni and beef option. In case you decide to bite the bullet and purchase this unhealthy canned pasta for taste alone, think again. Customers state this is a poor excuse for macaroni and beef, citing minimal meat and too much tomato sauce as just a few of the reasons why Great Value Pasta Rings & Meatballs in Tomato Sauce may not even be worth its low price tag. A can of Chef Boyardee pasta likely conjures up cozy childhood memories of simpler times (and yes, Chef Boyardee is a real chef who is even thought to have cooked for an American president), but throwing it into your cart for old times' sake might prove a mistake. Granted, making your own version of ravioli isn't quite as simple as opening a can and dumping it into a bowl, but given the contents of this product, finding a worthy homemade ravioli recipe might just prove a better option. Interestingly, Chef Boyardee Overstuffed Beef Ravioli prides itself in containing no artificial flavors and colors, or preservatives, but don't let the claims fool you -- this isn't a healthy canned pasta grab. Expect a number of additives, including soybean oil, caramel color, and high fructose corn syrup. You can also find a helping of about 320 calories, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 52 grams of carbohydrates, and 3 grams of added sugar in each can, alongside a whopping 1,350 milligrams of sodium. While a serving of Chef Boyardee Overstuffed Beef Ravioli will undoubtedly satisfy your appetite, this canned pasta is an additive-filled and extremely salty option you may wish to limit to only once or twice -- or never -- per week. Considering the fact that it doesn't contain meat, we thought that the Great Value Spaghetti Rings in Tomato Sauce may have drastically less sodium per can than Great Value Pasta Rings & Meatballs in Tomato Sauce, but alas, we were wrong. Sure, the 970 milligrams of sodium found in this canned pasta is indeed less than its meaty counterpart, but not by much. The amount of sodium contained in Great Value Spaghetti Rings in Tomato Sauce still consumes a hefty chunk of your daily recommended intake. As for added sugar in Great Value Spaghetti Rings in Tomato Sauce, prepare to be floored. There's a whopping 18 grams of added sugar per can, which is more than you'll find in a McDonald's Baked Apple Pie. While these sorts of canned pasta products are often marketed towards children, we'd say it's best to steer clear -- especially on a regular basis -- given their ghastly sodium and sugar amounts. While it's not often you find spaghetti and meatballs already cooked and canned with minimal effort required, let's just say that Chef Boyardee Spaghetti & Meatballs isn't exactly mom's home cooking. Yes, customers generally enjoy this nostalgic canned meal, but as far as ingredients and general nutrition go, Chef Boyardee Spaghetti & Meatballs isn't exactly a stellar canned pasta product. Like many other pasta products on this list, this can of spaghetti and meatballs is very high in sodium. Expect as much as 1,240 milligrams per 14.5-ounce can, which is over half of your daily recommended intake. Each can also contains 410 calories, 6 grams of saturated fat, 49 grams of carbohydrates, and 8 grams of added sugar. Besides excessive sodium, you'll also encounter ingredients you won't typically find in your typical pot of homemade spaghetti. Additions such as soy protein concentrate, soybean oil, and high fructose corn syrup all make a cameo in this canned pasta. Oh, and did we mention that the meatballs are partially made with mechanically separated chicken? This means the chicken used in the pasta was crammed into a sieve under high pressure to remove the bones from the meat and yield a smooth batter-like meat paste that acts as a key ingredient in the delicious Chef Boyardee meatballs. We're not sure we've ever had the pleasure of spotting canned macaroni and cheese on store shelves, making this Chef Boyardee Mac & Cheese option a unique pick. It's certainly convenient -- and maybe even tasty, according to a few consumer reports -- but this canned macaroni and cheese isn't exactly made up of the ingredients you'd expect. Here you'll find cheese flavor instead of real cheese, margarine instead of butter, and mono- and diglycerides. The latter are emulsifiers that can contain traces of trans fats, which, when consumed in high amounts, can lead to undesirable health outcomes. Lastly, Chef Boyardee Mac & Cheese contains an appalling 1,590 milligrams of sodium per 15-ounce can and 5 grams of saturated fat. On a positive note, there are at least no added sugars or high fructose corn syrup in the mix, which is a breath of fresh air compared to many of the canned pasta options on this list. Still, it's worth thinking twice before consuming Chef Boyardee Mac & Cheese, especially if you're looking to limit your saturated fat and sodium intake. SpaghettiOs Meatballs are certainly a fan favorite. Despite the big SpaghettiOs recall that pulled 15 million pounds of pasta from store shelves in 2010, this is still one brand that most people cherish with a child-like fondness. Despite its nostalgic appeal and slightly higher price point, SpaghettiOs Meatballs aren't much better for you than any other canned pasta product on this list. Each 15.6-ounce can of SpaghettiOs Meatballs contains 380 calories, along with 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 53 grams of carbohydrates, and 9 grams of added sugar. And though SpaghettiOs Meatballs supposedly contain 20% of your daily vegetables per 1 cup, it doesn't negate the fact that it also contains 1,000 milligrams of sodium per can, which is nearly half of your recommended daily intake. Additives such as dextrose, high fructose corn syrup, and soy protein concentrate are also listed as some of its ingredients, making it an unwholesome canned pasta choice overall. Annie's Organic Bernie O's isn't your typical canned pasta. It was created by, well, Annie, who is also behind the ever-popular Annie's Homegrown Mac and Cheese. Thanks to Annie's reputation for better-for-you ingredients, it might surprise you to find it a part of our unhealthiest canned pasta list. The good news is that Annie's Organic Bernie O's pasta doesn't feature the same lengthy list of additives as many other canned pasta products but instead focuses on wholesome components such as organic pasta, organic tomato paste, sea salt, and organic cheddar cheese. So, what's the fuss? Sadly, a can of Annie's Organic Bernie O's contains 1,160 milligrams of sodium, 49 grams of carbohydrates, and 7 grams of added sugar, putting it on par with other canned pastas on the list despite its wholesome ingredients. Thus, while this Annie's pasta product is certainly a better pick than the average can of SpaghettiOs ingredients-wise, its sodium and sugar content still leave more to be desired. Canned chili mac sounds like a simple, delicious, and nutritious way to get lunch on the table, right? Well, not quite. While Campbell's Chunky Chili Mac seems to leave most customers feeling satisfied, this 18.8-ounce canned pasta packs a wallop in the sodium category, containing nearly 75% of your recommended daily intake. You read that right -- Campbell's Chunky Chili Mac contains 1,720 milligrams of sodium per can, making it the saltiest canned pasta on the list yet. And that's not all. Expect it to contain all the usual additives found in canned pasta, including the likes of soy lecithin, caramel color, modified cornstarch, and maltodextrin. Our conclusion? Save Campbell's Chunky Chili Mac for a once-in-a-while indulgence, if at all. Given that consistent excessive salt intake is associated with an increased risk of health issues such as kidney disease, heart failure, and stomach cancer, you may want to approach a canned pasta of this caliber with caution. We hate to highlight yet another Annie's pick as unhealthy, but when it comes to some nutritional categories, a can of Annie's Organic All Stars simply isn't the best choice. Like the other Annie's organic canned pasta options on this list, it comes with organic ingredients you don't normally see in canned pasta products. It also lacks high fructose corn syrup or hard-to-pronounce additives. Despite its wholesome components, a can of Annie's Organic All Stars contains a concerning 1,150 milligrams of sodium per can. The general recommendation for sodium intake is even less for children than adults, with those between the ages of 4 and 8 recommended to consume only 1,500 milligrams or less. That means you may want to be careful about how much (and how often) you plate this pasta up for your kiddos. Also, be sure to watch for added sugar when consuming Annie's Organic All Stars. You'll only get 210 calories and 0 grams of saturated fat per can, but there's still 44 grams of carbohydrates and 7 grams of added sugar, which is a hefty amount for a non-dessert food option. Annie's Organic Cheesy Ravioli is the last from the Annie's brand in our unhealthiest canned pasta series. Like the others, this canned pasta seems okay at first glance. Inside, you'll find Annie's ravioli shells stuffed with cheese and drenched in tomato sauce. As always, the ingredients used by this brand are quite impressive and include organic brown rice flour, organic wheat flour, sea salt, and real, organic cheddar cheese. Still, at 1,070 milligrams of sodium per can, we can hardly regard this option as a healthy choice, especially when offered to children. That said, high sodium isn't the only thing to watch out for when considering Annie's Organic Cheesy Ravioli. While other Annie's canned pasta options on this list also contain added sugar, this particular variety takes the cake. Expect Annie's Organic Cheesy Ravioli to contain as much as 9 added grams of sugar per can, which is quite the feat. After all, this is pasta and not a cookie, right? Like the meatball variety of the same product, SpaghettiOs Original is an old-school, ready-to-eat meal that's held near and dear to many hearts. Unfortunately, this canned pasta contains the same concerning ingredients and nutritional issues as many of the other options on this list, making it quite an unhealthy pick despite the nostalgia-based adoration it receives from fans. Starting with the ingredients, expect SpaghettiOs Original to contain high fructose corn syrup and various additives also found in most other non-organic canned pasta products. As you can probably imagine, SpaghettiOs Original is high in sodium, with 1,070 milligrams in every 15.8-ounce can. To make matters worse, SpaghettiOs Original has one of the highest sugar totals we've seen in canned pasta, with a shocking 11 grams of added sugar. Need ideas for making SpaghettiOs at least a tiny bit healthier? If you must, consider adding shredded zucchini to the mix, or at least serving it with a side salad or roasted broccoli. In general, though, we'd recommend skipping this canned pasta dish or consuming it in moderation. SpaghettiOs Original may seem like a fun way to reminisce on old times, but with nutritional stats like these, there are definitely stronger choices out there. For more food and drink goodness, join The Takeout's newsletter. Get taste tests, food & drink news, deals from your favorite chains, recipes, cooking tips, and more! Read the original article on The Takeout.

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