After One Chaotic Stay, Woman Says ‘Never Again' to Hosting Sister-in-Law and Niece

Yahoo

16-06-2025

A woman hosted her sister-in-law and young niece during a stressful week, only for the visit to turn her home upside down
Sleep-deprived and overwhelmed, she drew the line when asked to host again
Now her husband is saying she's being 'unfair,' but the Redditor remains firm in her boundaryA woman has turned to the Reddit community for support after a difficult experience hosting her sister-in-law and her young niece overnight in her home.
She explains that a few months ago, her sister-in-law and her 3-year-old daughter came to stay for nearly a week while the child was being assessed for autism in their state.
'I had suggested to my partner that they stay in a hotel, even offered that we cover the costs because my SIL is what I could only call a free range mom,' she writes in her post, adding, 'She is struggling and is likely trying to do whatever will make the day go by.'
The woman describes how she tried to be as accommodating as possible, especially since she and her partner have a 4-year-old son with his own routines and household rules.
'Aside from our weekly movie night he doesn't access any other screen time and doesn't have a personal device,' she says, but her niece 'was glued to her iPad the entire time, volume on loud and if my SIL tried lowering the volume the kid would start screaming.'
At first, the woman and her partner tried to see the positive side, thinking, 'This is a good opportunity for him to understand that some people do things differently for whatever reason.' But things quickly became overwhelming as the days went on. 'By day three, it was clear that this wasn't just about the kid getting used to a different environment, it was full-blown chaos,' she recalls.
The chaos affected everyone in the house, including their son, who struggled to sleep because of the noise. 'Constant screaming and banging well into the night, the iPad on loud until nighttime too. It kept everyone up,' she shares, noting that even in their large five-bedroom home, 'we all stayed up because of it including our son who could not sleep until he asked to stay in our room.'
The stress didn't stop at bedtime. The woman also works from home and found it impossible to concentrate. 'I occasionally WFH but just couldn't and had to leave,' she admits.
She also points out that her sister-in-law's lack of boundaries extended beyond the noise and screen time. 'My SIL would say she was stepping out for a walk and be gone for hours, leaving her daughter with us with no heads up or prep,' she says, emphasizing, 'I want to be clear, I have so much empathy. I know parenting a child with additional needs is exhausting.'
Despite her empathy, she feels taken advantage of. 'I didn't sign up to be free childcare, especially when we were already hosting them, driving them around, buying a lot of additional frozen food and snacks that we never keep at home so that the daughter could eat,' she explains. She adds that all of this was happening 'while trying to maintain some structure for our own kid.'
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After the visit, the woman and her partner argued about what happened. 'He felt I was being too harsh, I said, if they need to come again for another assessment, we either book and pay for a hotel if they really can't afford it or set very clear boundaries about what kind of help we're able to offer, and stick to them,' she recounts.
Now, her sister-in-law needs to return for another assessment and has asked to stay again. The woman is standing her ground, writing, 'My partner thinks I'm being unkind and unsupportive, but I honestly think we did everything we could last time and hosting again is just too stressful. So I said no.'
Commenters are firmly on her side.
"Mean suggestion incoming," writes one commenter. "How about you book a hotel for you and your son and let your partner deal with his sister and niece?. He won't invite them again."
Adds another, "Have either of you communicated with your SIL about the impact the last stay had on your family? I'm curious about whether she is even aware. She may not like hearing it, but I feel like you have some valid points - i.e. the disruption to your/your child's schedule, the free childcare, the food, etc. But you have a right to your peace and aren't under any obligation to host anyone who causes chaos in your household."
Read the original article on People