Woman Refuses to Give in to In-Laws' Demands to Ditch Her Own Family Tradition for Their Fourth of July Plans

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2 days ago

A woman and her family have enjoyed the same Fourth of July vacation tradition for more than 20 years
Her in-laws recently began demanding that they split the holiday
But her husband insists his family never had Fourth of July traditions to begin withA woman is asking the Reddit community for support after her decision to stand firm on a cherished family tradition led to tension with her in-laws.
'My in-laws are mean, demanding, and entitled,' she begins her post. 'They have disregarded our parenting rules constantly, belittled me time and again, and gaslit us both repeatedly. I am in therapy.'
When she married her husband 13 years ago, his parents insisted on spending every holiday together as a big, happy family. Her own parents, however, wanted to alternate holidays, with the exception of their beloved family Hanukkah party. 'This is also what we wanted to do. So that's what we do,' she explains.
The Fourth of July, however, has always been different. She shares, 'My parents and I have been doing the same mini vacation every year on July 4th since I was a teenager.'
Her husband joined the tradition when they met. 'When we had the kids 6 years ago, they obviously came with us too. We look forward to it every year. The kids love it. I love it. He loves it,' she writes.
Recently, her in-laws have started demanding that the Fourth of July be split every other year. They now claim that they had special traditions with their son during that holiday, but her husband insists otherwise. 'He says that he was always at a friend's house,' she notes, casting doubt on her in-laws' sudden claim.
Adding to the complexity, her mother-in-law's birthday falls on July 14th. 'We have ANOTHER mini vacation every year with them for her birthday. And since July 4th weekend is 3 days, and her birthday weekend is only 2 days, we've also been going up for a SECOND weekend in August,' she explains.
She and her husband have tried to propose a compromise, suggesting that if they alternated the Fourth of July, they wouldn't also visit the following weekend for her birthday. 'We'd just celebrate it when we were up,' she says. However, "his parents got so angry that we would ever even consider that,' she shares.
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Now, she finds herself at a crossroads, torn between maintaining a beloved tradition and appeasing her in-laws. 'I love my family's tradition for over 20 years. My husband has loved it for 13. My kids have loved it for their entire lives,' she writes.
Commenters are taking her side, with a little advice, too.
Writes one, "You and your husband need to work together with your therapist(s) to start laying down some hard boundaries for his parents and then enforce those boundaries. They sound like they make you miserable and they demand a lot of you. But here's the thing.... You guys are grown-ups and they don't get to make demands of you anymore. Neither of you has to put up with this."
Adds another, "It's time to tell your in-laws that your family is going to have its own traditions whether they like it or not. If they pitch a fit, be blunt and tell them that if they plan on being a part of your family they will honor this. Then be prepared to go [low-contact] with them."
Read the original article on People