The 5 Best Dating Apps For Trans People
Whether you've been swiping since the dawn of Tinder or you're brand-new to the apps, success for anyone requires knowing what you want out of the experience, picking the right platform, and, for transgender people in particular, considering a few other unique needs.
'Trans people face the challenge of being misunderstood, objectified, or harassed on dating apps,' says trans dating and relationship coach Kara Chang, adding that daters may also grapple with 'decision fatigue around when and how to disclose our trans identity.'
Plus, there's the fact that, as Chang notes, many dating apps simply weren't built with trans people in mind. That makes choosing the right ones all the more important. First, look for platforms that prioritize inclusivity and safety. 'A good dating app protects you as a user, gives you the freedom to express your gender identity authentically, and has a culture that values respect and an equal user experience for all,' says Chang.
Of course, as queer love coach Nathan Serrato, founder of Queer Conscious, adds, the trans dating experience is unique to each individual. What works for one dater may not work for another. But this curated selection of dating apps—recommended for trans and nonbinary users by LGBTQIA+ dating experts—is a good place to start.
Grindr is best known as a dating/hookup app for gay men, but it's so much more than that. Zachary Zane, Grindr's sex and relationship expert, says the platform is inclusive of queer, trans, and nonbinary folks as well. 'On Grindr,' explains Zane, 'bisexual men are looking to date trans women. There are gay and bi trans men looking for other men. Nonbinary folks are looking for love and there are plenty of queer people on the app looking to date a trans or nonbinary person.'
Plus, as one of the first and largest online dating platforms for queer users, Grindr has a long history of providing a space designed specifically with LGBTQIA+ daters in mind. That ethos extends beyond the app itself. Launched in 2015, Grindr for Equality, the brand's social impact initiative, partners with public health authorities and other activist organizations to advance LGBTQIA+ health and human rights.
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One of the earliest online dating platforms, OkCupid has long been a pioneer of inclusivity. Back in 2014, the app became the first in the biz to expand gender and sexual orientation options for users, and daters can now choose from over 60 labels. In 2022, OkCupid also added definitions for these labels to help better educate all users. Plus, 'the algorithm actually uses your questionnaire responses to match you with people who are genuinely compatible,' says Chang. This can lead to less mindless swiping and more meaningful connections with like-minded people who know (and love!) what you're all about.
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If Grindr is known as an app for gay men, HER is the most prominent app for lesbian women. But, like Grindr, HER is an inclusive platform that welcomes queer sapphics of all kinds, including nonbinary and trans people. HER also boasts a Trust and Safety team, a verification process designed to weed out fakes and scammers, and moderators to ensure all users enjoy a respectful experience. Plus, HER's website specifically mentions keeping the app transphobe-free—a helpful indicator that the platform is serious about the needs and safety of its trans users.
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'Translr is one of the rare apps built for the trans community. It's a space dedicated to trans people and the people who want to date us,' says Chang. 'There is a mutual understanding among users—no need to explain our existence, just vibes and love.' The app also boasts a rigorous verification process to protect users and block fetishizers and catfish, as well as a zero-tolerance policy for harassment.
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While apps that are designed specifically for queer and/or trans users may provide a safer and more inclusive experience, they also tend to come with the downside of smaller dating pools. Unfortunately, 'more users can also mean more exposure to transphobia,' says Serrato. Enter: Hinge, a popular dating app that welcomes daters of all genders and sexual orientations and actively works to provide a safe and supportive experience for queer and trans users.
'As trans people, we often feel like our identities are being flattened, with people focusing primarily on our trans identity instead of our full selves,' says Moe Ari Brown, Hinge's love and connection expert. Per Brown, Hinge 'understands that trans people are more than their identities and that meaningful connections happen when everyone feels safe showing up as their full self.' The app includes more than 50 gender options and users can write in their own or not share a gender identity in their profile at all. 'This allows people to express who they are without forcing anyone to disclose any information they don't want to,' says Brown. In February, as a result of conversations with Hinge's community partner TransTech Social, the app launched Match Note, a feature designed to help users—particularly those from underrepresented groups—share important information about themselves with matches only. In testing, Brown says queer daters used Match Notes to highlight key aspects of their gender identity, lifestyle, and relationship preferences, adding that 83 percent of trans people said the feature 'improved their ability to show up as their authentic self on Hinge.'
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For an expanded list of resources specific to the trans community, click here.
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Buzz Feed
18 hours ago
- Buzz Feed
31 People Who Dated Adult Film Stars
Sex work and its related fields are heavily stigmatized in the US, but with the rise of platforms like OnlyFans, that seems to be slowly changing. People are learning that sex is an industry as well as an act, and for many, it's their job — and it doesn't stop them from doing the things everyone else does, like dating. So when Reddit user Yonaadug asked about people's experiences dating those in the adult entertainment industry, it was super eye-opening to read the responses (which also included stories about dating OnlyFans creators and sex workers). Here's what people who have dated in the industry have said about their experiences.* "She was a high-end sex worker in LA. We met on Tinder. She told me about her job on the second date, which I didn't really care about. She was pretty, normal, funny, and smart — she had lots of good qualities. She was completely separating it as work, not her personal life. But after a bit, it was weird to ask her to go see a movie on a Friday night, and she said she couldn't because one of her regulars had already booked her. And these are like millionaires in mansions; I lived a studio apartment. After a while, I was like, yeah, I can't do this." "I dated a pornstar who came from my area (my school district, really) and was back in town taking care of a parent who got COVID. I met her at an NFL football game — she was sitting next to me with her mom, and I was helping explain the game. I told her where I was from, and she was super happy to see someone from the same area. I gave her my number and told her to text me if she wanted to go on a date or hang out. She texted me before I even got back to my car that she wanted to go out to this restaurant that I actually love. We went and had a great time; I never mentioned that I knew what she did." "Right after college about 17 years ago, I briefly dated a girl who made soft-core porn. I met her because her older sister was in a sorority at my school. ... She wasn't a huge partier and was really introverted. I was going out to bars 3-4 nights a week, and I'm pretty outgoing. I ended things with her after about three weeks. ... I really couldn't handle the attention from my friends. It was all they talked about. It was how they would introduce me to new people. I got a million questions about the sex with her every day. (It was pretty good but not the best). I just wanted to be me and not just the person dating the pornstar in other people's eyes." "I recently went on a date with a famous porn star. We went to Disneyland; needless to say, she was getting random Airdrops on her phone while we were in line, probably from random fans. We met up with one of her friends, who is also a big porn star. They both had to turn off Airdrop because of the random messages they were getting, lol." "I met and casually dated a rather successful OF girl for a while after meeting on a dating app. I found out a couple of months in that she did OnlyFans and made a terrifying amount of money on it (I was suspicious when she bought two PS5s in one day for each household like it was no big deal)." "I went on a few dates with one. The first time we met, she wanted to meet at her place. She asked me to bring some shawarma, so I did. She had zero makeup, was not dressed up at all, and kept things nonsexual. The second time, I picked her up, and we went out clubbing in West Hollywood. This time, she was well dressed up, with her makeup done, and looked stunning. We had a great time and went back to her place. We had amazing sex, but not porn sex if that makes sense. The next day, she did an interview for, I think, Playboy Radio on SXM." "I was involved with a girl that did OnlyFans. ... It was solo content where she would either take pictures or stream videos just hanging out nude or doing whatever daily things, like makeup, organizing items, etc. Day-to-day life stuff. Gaming. She was a cool chick and all, to be honest at first it didn't bother me when she told me what she did for a living. I figured, 'After all, she chose me to get involved with.'" "I dated a sex worker. She was the most honest woman I've ever met. On our second date, she told me what she did and asked if it was a problem. I said no. The sex was not good. She was very proficient, and we were very compatible, but she couldn't orgasm, and she said she probably wouldn't for like a year. That didn't work for a girl can't enjoy herself, I can't have sex with her. I gave her the 'let's just be friends' speech. She ended up getting knocked up by an asshole who dumped her. She was from Eastern Europe, and the dad was German. Her baby had medical issues that could only be treated in Germany. I helped her get residency; her baby got surgery, and both of them are doing well. She never got married, and I feel bad for her — she was smart as hell and would have made a great wife. All she ever wanted was a family." "I've dated a couple of women who were, or had been, in the entertainment industry, and it was fine. They don't think about work when they're not at work. There were occasional passing moments when I had trouble separating the two — not jealousy, but for example, I had a span of several weeks where my life was really stressful, and I didn't have a lot of sex drive, and she complained about being sexually frustrated. My first stressed-out thought was, 'Really? Don't you get more than enough sexual attention elsewhere?' but I moved past it pretty quickly. Fortunately, I didn't say my first thoughts out loud." "Back in the mid-90s, I had a job at an 'upscale' strip club (their words). They regularly hosted feature acts, most of whom were active performers in adult films. One weekend, I was tasked with being the 'handler' for one. Pick her up from the airport, drive her to her hotel or wherever she wants, get her to the club, etc. This particular woman was at the height of her popularity; she had a bunch of movies and was a big name in the industry. I picked her up Thursday evening. She was exhausted and wanted a 'sit down dinner,' so I made a few recommendations, and she picked one. She said she hated eating alone in strange places, so I joined her." "I am a lesbian who dated a retired award-winning porn star who had hardcore sex with A LOT of men (and women) on camera before we dated. I met her through a dating app during COVID, and she was separated from her ex-husband at the time. I didn't really care about the porn stuff, but I did care a little about what my parents thought of it. She had some interesting/wild stories about her porn days, and I didn't really mind hearing about most of it." "I worked in the porn business in the '80s and '90s behind the camera. I dated several of the girls in the business at that time, though rarely anything seriously. Some of them were just really fun to hang out with. One day, I was on a shoot and was filming this incredibly good-looking woman having sex. We wound up talking for like two hours while we were waiting around for another girl to show up. I asked if she wanted to get dinner. We did. Long story short, we're still married today. So yeah, I get to say the first time I ever met my wife was filming her having sex with another guy. Go figure." "Ex did OnlyFans seriously. She was a baller, it was great. 11/10 sex. She paid for shit cause she liked to show off her limitless cash. But holy fuck, her phone went off every minute. At best. Sometimes, multiple message notifications went off every minute. She straight-up refused to put her phone on DND or anything when we were together. I got sick of listening to it, stopped talking to her, and moved on to see someone else. It was a bit disappointing because we did vibe heaps well. She was hot AF. I definitely didn't mind all the nudes and filthy videos she'd send me whenever we weren't together for the night. Didn't talk to anyone about it either. Friends would definitely be weird about that stuff." "I was in the industry for a while and dated a beautiful woman who won an AVN award and was quite well-known. She was delightful, but our relationship ended because she died of a drug overdose. Tragic, but at the time, it seemed an occupational hazard in the industry. Not sure how it is these days — I changed fields after that." "I met a cam girl at a bar eight years ago and hooked up that night. I thought that'd be the end of it until, some months later, she reached out and wanted me to come over to her place, which was a lot more luxurious than I had expected. Apparently, she was making quite the income and also had fans bombarding her with expensive gifts. I'm guessing she was more popular than others, but I never bothered to actually look her up." "I've dated two. One was the typical dancer turned model turned exotic dancer turned porn star. The other was your average OnlyFans content creator. The two, and their social circles, couldn't be any more different." "I've dated two male porn stars in the past (not at the same time). Neither lasted very long, but it was alright while it lasted. Both guys used the money to fund their tech start-ups, with varying success, so I caught them on the tail end of their sex work career. One guy is now very successful and has an app/website that I see around pretty often. He was sweet and very romantic, but he talked a lot and was incredibly impatient. And man, he had great taste in fancy restaurants. The other guy was getting kicked out of a bar for doing coke in the bathroom the last time I saw him. He had a pretty rough life, I think, and had some other issues going on. He also had a lot of beef with Owen Gray, which was weirdly a topic on a few of our dates. I also think this guy had ties with some organized crime; his apartment always had shipments of arms going in and out. Very strange." "I met a woman online years ago. At the time, I was extremely depressed and lonely. We would hang out as friends, eat pizza, and watch movies a few times a week. I found out she was an independent sex worker. She would ask to hang out whenever she didn't have clients, and we were both free. After a few weeks, she wanted to date, which surprised me. Then in the same conversation, she asked me to be her pimp. The most illegal thing I've ever done was get traffic tickets. So, this felt like a Walter White moment for me. She was a cool person, but I had to go my separate way after that conversation. To this day, I'm not sure why she asked me to work with her. But wherever she is today, I hope she's doing well." "I dated a guy in 2001 who went on to do porn. He's a little skinny guy with a huge dick. Nice guy, good in bed, super smart. Way too much of a pothead and too personally irresponsible with things like money and cleaning up after himself for me to settle down with." "Sensual massages (i.e., rub and tug) was my wife's profession. We've been married for six years, together for seven. I love her more than anything in the world — and yes, she does give a world-class hand job." "I'm still with her — about to celebrate five years. :D I helped her get paid more and learn to book shoots, etc. I love her, and she loves what she does." "I dated an OF model. ... The sex was great; she was very adventurous and did almost anything we could think of. We had a few threesomes and even a foursome (me and three women, wouldn't really recommend). We went to swinger clubs, private lavish parties, etc. She'd actively try to pick up women while we were out and didn't mind if I did the same. Bad part? The phone. She was constantly replying to messages and chats; she couldn't give it a break for even 15 minutes. Once, right after sex, I could hear her already on her phone in the bathroom as she was cleaning herself up. I knew in my mind I'd never be permanently with her, so when I got annoyed enough, I told her it wasn't working and moved along." "I dated an actress when I was in my twenties. I met her at a store that did out-call sex work (legal in this country), and I met her fairly regularly through said store. My friend was a pretty established DJ, and I used to head to the club regularly with him. She had quit her previous sex work gig, and she had just started DJing. This is pretty normal over here, with girls trying different things to keep themselves relevant rather than just sex work. Out of sheer coincidence, she ended up getting booked regularly at the same venues as my friend. I guess the fact that we were used to being sexual with each other, coupled with the alcohol and the regularity that we would meet, made a relationship kind of inevitable. For those curious, we ended up hooking up in the garden during one of her gigs. There was a bit of alcohol in both of us, and we just started making out. She was honestly a fairly normal girl who just happened to be an AV actress and a DJ." "I had a crush on a coworker back in 2000/2001. She was cute AF and had a wildly good body. She was on/off with another coworker, so nothing happened between us. Fast-forward five or so years. I'm back home from the military, at the local strip joint, and she comes out dancing. We talked for a while that night and ended up dating for a few months. She had a bad couple of years before and ended up doing several movies. Oral was 10/10. Sex was great at first — she was like a human sex doll. She would sell that she was loving everything. But there was no real intimacy if that makes sense. There was no real break up; she liked living the stripper/F&B lifestyle, which didn't fit my 8-5 work schedule." "I live in 'porn valley' aka the San Fernando Valley north of LA, which is known historically as the porn capital of the world. In the 1990s and 2000s, there were plenty of porn actresses around if you were in the right age bracket and sort of aware of the scene. I met many girls in the business back then. ... My best story would be about three girls who were living in a house together. The thing to remember is that if these ladies were mildly successful in the business (i.e., busy, shooting scenes every day or other day), they made a really nice income. Not a fortune, but they were balling for their age, and it was all FAST CASH. So they were independent women, feeling empowered by their success, and of course, young and wanting to have fun! It was an exciting time for them! And I got to go along for the ride for a while." "Not exactly a star, but he was a porn actor for a little while. I used to do sex work, too, so I didn't hold it against him. Plus, we both have really high libido and endurance (probably how we both ended up in sex work), so meeting our match in bed was a massive pleasant surprise. We were both pretty messed up people when we first met. It was supposed to be just a hookup. We ended up getting along really well, and we kept meeting, with hooking up as an excuse. Before we noticed, the romance aspect was already more prominent than the sexual one. We went on dates. He met my parents. He even went with me on a family trip. We're still together, saving up money to move in together and get married." "I dated a young woman who did a few XXX scenes with known producers, and when we were dating, it was her career. She told me on the first date, and I was a little taken aback but still game since she was so gorgeous and sexy. It was perfect for me at the time, coming off a long-term relationship and also feeling the last of my young-man oats as I turned 40. We dated on and off for almost a year. ... The sex was amazing and no-holds-barred, with her constantly saying things like, 'I want to practice this thing I might have to do for a scene. Are you game?'" "I dated a girl that did mainstream porn and OnlyFans. She had to travel to Vegas once a month to shoot scenes and was getting tested once a month. It's roughly similar to a regular job because most view it as work and then put on a specific personality for marketing purposes (interviews, etc). It's going to boil down to how you view porn. If you think it's competition, then you will be miserable. If you view it as just another job to pay the bills, then it's relatively normal." "It's fun and lively until it's not. I super encourage anyone to try it out and be open-minded, but just be cautious. ... Sometimes it's not her. She could be amazing. You could be okay with her work. But her social circle is fucked beyond belief: drugs, low-rent or high-rent criminals, mental health crises galore with her best friends or mom or whatever. She always has a wildly violent ex. She might not have credit, but she has lots of money. ... It's all cash business — so she uses pre-paid credit cards and can't sign a lease on an apartment ... I learned if I like her, then I just naturally fall into pseudo husband mode and that is a headache if you break up. I've never been ripped off or been taken advantage of. (I have, but not with a sex work girl; they have been surprisingly honest with me.)" "Right before I met the woman of my dreams, my now-wife, I met Brooke. She had just moved from Cali, and I met her on some random dating app. This girl was sickeningly hot. Like an absolute model. I was shook when she actually wanted to meet. I was pretty into party drugs (mostly, ex, acid, RC, and I did get into smoking meth for like a month — not my proudest times in life) at the time and figured it was worth the gamble to go meet her. I didn't give a fuck about anything." And finally..."To give a different perspective, I am a camgirl and sell content on OF. I'm in a serious relationship as well, but I started after meeting him. Our relationship is healthy— great communication and depth, and our sex life is great! He is actually more sexually experienced than I am, and he sees me as innocent despite what I do. I also have a Masters Degree and have held long-term jobs that paid well. I started in the industry as a temporary solution after a massive layoff at the company I worked for. I'm six months in and plan to find something else soon, but I might continue camming part-time to pay off some credit card debt and my student loans. As far as my personality goes, I consider myself kind, humble, intelligent, and funny." Now it's your turn — have you ever dated someone in any of these industries, or are you a sex worker, adult entertainment star, or OnlyFans creator who dates? Let us know in the comments below or via this anonymous form.
New York Post
2 days ago
- New York Post
Divisive new app lets women put bad dates on blast — and men are freaking out: ‘Digital vigilantism'
There's a new app causing men to break into a cold sweat — and it's not because they forgot their wallet on a first date. Tea, a women-only app that lets users post anonymous Yelp-style reviews of men they've dated, has shot to the top of the Apple App Store — and smack into the middle of a digital war between safety and slander. The platform, launched in 2023, lets women share stories and warnings about exes, Tinder flops, and potential predators. Advertisement 3 Forget ghosting — this app has men begging to be left off the grid. Studio Romantic – Users can toss out 'green flags' or 'red flags' — or, in some cases, blast a guy's entire romantic résumé into cyberspace. The feed is full of candid commentary, catfish alerts, and more than a few 'avoid this man' declarations. Advertisement 'I see men freaking out today about this Tea app,' TikTokker @azalialexi said in a recent video. 'If you don't want things like this to exist then maybe look into advocating for women's safety and actually holding your fellow men accountable.' Tea's website claims the app was born after its founder, Sean Cook, 'witnessed his mother's terrifying experience with online dating — not only being catfished but unknowingly engaging with men who had criminal records.' It now boasts nearly 1 million users, and it's not just the safety features — like reverse image search and criminal background checks — that are turning heads. The public reviews are what really set the app ablaze. Advertisement 3 Launched in 2023, the app lets women dish on shady dates, dodgy exes and full-on predators — one swipe and horror story at a time. .tiktok/@theteapartygirls 'It's kind of like a Carfax situation,' Sabrina Henriquez, 28, who found out some of her exes had less-than-stellar ratings on Tea, told The Washington Post in a recent interview. 'It kind of saved [other women] from putting themselves in that situation.' Advertisement But not everyone's here for the gossip. 'I think the app has good intentions, it's just very messy,' Donovan James, 21, also told the outlet. 'You're always going to look bad in somebody's eyes.' Others worry it's turning into digital vigilantism. Apps like these or Facebook groups like 'Are We Dating The Same Guy' are the 'equivalent of whisper networks,' Chiara Wilkinson wrote for Dazed. Or as Dazed writer James Greig put it: 'It's digital vigilantism; the TikTok equivalent of a citizen's arrest.' Douglas Zytko, a professor at the University of Michigan at Flint, said to The Washington Post that the app is filling a void dating apps never addressed: safety. 3 Still, fears of false claims linger — and TikTok is crawling with jittery dudes doom-scrolling the damage. Mdv Edwards – 'There are multiple studies now showing that around 10 percent of overall cases of sexual assault are attributed to a dating app,' he noted. Advertisement Still, false accusations remain a fear. TikTok is now flooded with men nervously scrolling. 'Hot take: The tea app is toxic,' wrote @johnnysaysgo, who had a female friend go undercover to see what women were saying about him. 'These women were clearly just upset… I was honest with them and respectful.' User @ warned: 'Be careful.' He added that he can see the 'vision' behind the app but noted that he knows 'how vile' people who might use it could be. Advertisement And users like @kristakilduff are just enjoying the drama after getting accepted into the app. 'The men are not safe,' she said with a laugh in a recent clip. 'The Tea app has me weak — stay safe.' The backlash — and buzz — around Tea is just the latest sign that the digital dating landscape is shifting, and not necessarily for the better. As The Post previously reported, not all matches made in algorithm heaven are built to last. Advertisement A new study published in Computers in Human Behavior found that married couples who met online reported lower levels of satisfaction and stability than those who met IRL — a phenomenon dubbed the 'online dating effect.' Researchers pointed to factors like geographic distance, delayed family approval and lack of shared social circles as possible causes. So, while dating apps might be great for scoring first dates and flings, they may not always deliver happily ever after.
Cosmopolitan
2 days ago
- Cosmopolitan
Rachel Zegler Is Set to Return to 'Evita' After Leaving Mid-Show
Rachel Zegler's gig as the titular character in Jamie Lloyd's revival of Evita at the London Palladium has been all over our social feeds thanks to her stunning performances, but she made headlines for a different reason during her latest show. On July 24, the Cosmopolitan cover girl suddenly exited the stage mid-show as she had fallen ill. According to People, Rachel's departure was announced during intermission, and her understudy, Bella Brown, stepped into the role despite appearing as Perón's Mistress earlier in the night. After a 45-minute intermission, Bella transformed into Evita just in time for the Tony-winning musical's second act. A source in the audience told E! News, 'The interval lasted almost 40 to 45 minutes and then the balcony scene with Bella began. You would have thought the roof was going to cave in from the applause. Even more so when she entered on stage for the first time after the balcony scene.' She opened with the iconic number, 'Don't Cry for Me, Argentina,' marking her second time playing Eva Perón after she made her debut on July 14. In this production, Jamie Lloyd and Andrew Lloyd Webber pulled a page from his Sunset Blvd. book and takes the performance outdoors. At this point in the show, Eva sings to a crowd of Argentinians from the balcony of the Presidential Palace, which is actually the London Palladium's balcony IRL. Since Evita's opening night on July 1, the general public has swarmed the outside of the venue on Argyll Street to catch a glimpse of the stars in action. After Bella carried the rest of the show in Rachel's absence, she received a standing ovation that lasted nearly five minutes, and according to fans on social media, the cast had bowed 10 separate times during the curtain call. She expressed her appreciation for the cast, crew, and crowd with a series of Instagram Stories following the performance. 'Today really showed just how important swings and covers are within this industry,' the actress later wrote in an Instagram Story. 'They are pillars of a show!! A proud day to be at Evita.' In a separate post, she added, 'What a lucky audience getting to see both myself and MY ANGEL REG ZEG!!' While we hope Rachel has a speedy recovery, her rep confirmed to The Hollywood Reporter that she is scheduled to return and perform Friday evening.
