Latest news with #Delnna
Indian Express
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- Indian Express
When Jaya Bachchan said addressing someone as ‘tu, tum' are ‘big red flags': ‘Aapne kabhi mujhe nana ko ‘tum' karke baat karte huye suna hai?'
Jaya Bachchan, often criticised for her stern responses to the paparazzi, once shared her thoughts on 'bad manners,' emphasising that addressing someone as 'Tu, Tum' is derogatory. 'Bad manners for me would be a big red flag. Ek cheez jo mujhe bahut buri lagti hai jab log 'tu, tum' karke baat karte hai…chahiye kisse se bhi ho…Aapne kabhi mujhe nana ko tum se baat karte huye suna hai? (One thing that really upsets me is when people address others with 'tu', 'tum', or whatever it may be. Have you ever heard me using 'tum' for your grandfather?) I think these things require conscious efforts, which your generation doesn't do,' the Guddi actor told granddaughter Navya Naveli Nanda and daughter Shweta Bachchan on her YouTube podcast in 2024. Taking a cue from this confession, let's understand whether how we address someone makes any difference. Words build or break bonds. Respect doesn't begin in grand gestures. 'It begins in the way we address, acknowledge, and speak,' said Delnna Rrajesh, psychotherapist, energy healer and life coach. 'We often underestimate how much the way we speak becomes the culture we pass down. If we speak with sharpness, our children absorb that as normal. If we interrupt, dismiss, or use commanding tones under the guise of 'just being casual,' we unknowingly plant seeds of emotional distance. When someone says 'Tu' instead of 'Aap' in close relationships, it's not always disrespectful. But when tone carries entitlement, command, or indifference, the relationship begins to erode,' shared Delnna. As a therapist, she reiterated having seen this happen silently. 'The parent who constantly feels disrespected by their adult child. The spouse who starts to shrink from conversations because they don't feel spoken to, they feel spoken at. The child who begins to mirror the same sharpness in school or with friends,' shared Delnna. So, here are a few real-world, practical ways to build respectful communication: *Start with 'aap' when in doubt. Even if your culture or family is informal, beginning with gentleness sets the tone. *Watch your tone, not just your words. 'Please' doesn't work if it's laced with sarcasm. *Never correct someone in public. Respect means preserving dignity, especially when the other is vulnerable. *Avoid commands. Use requests. Replace 'Do this' with 'Can you please help me with…?' *Acknowledge, don't assume. 'Just because someone is younger or close doesn't mean they owe you informality,' said Delnna. *Model what you want to see. If you interrupt, shout, or disregard, expect that energy to echo back at you eventually. *Repair when you slip. A genuine 'I'm sorry for the way I said that' can heal more than you imagine. In the end, the greatest way to teach values to the next generation is not by lecturing them, but by living them. 'Your children won't remember every piece of advice but they will remember how you made them feel,' said Delnna.
Indian Express
24-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Indian Express
‘Dikhti bhi golmatol hai': Rubina Dilaik recalls being body shamed by director of her first show, says went on soup-only diet for a year to lose weight
Rubina Dilaik recently recalled being body shamed on the sets of her first show in 2008, sharing how it forced her to be on a soup-only diet for a year, following which, on her second show, her waist looked 'snatched' but her 'glow' was gone. 'I was called chubby. I used to wonder….I have baby fat here and there. Ek director ne camera ke peeche se chillakar bola that, 'arey yeh seb ke beti kaha se lekar aaye ho…waapis bhejo Himachal mein…isko na chalna aata hai aur dikhti bhi golmatol hai.' Yeh set par aapka pehla show hai, and koi aapko aapke look ke liye…(Once a director shouted where have you got her from, send her back to Himachal (native place)..she is also fat…) You are literally mistreated. It stains your memory to an extent that I went on boiled spinach soup and nutri (diet) for one complete year and I pledged to myself that I am going to get to size zero, and I achieved that,' Dilaik said on her YouTube podcast Kisine Bataya Nahi. Admitting that she 'looked so sick and pale' in her second show, the 37-year-old continued: 'My energies were so down. That phase…when I look back…I am like…what was I thinking…I wish somebody had taught me how to embrace myself. Kisine nahi bataya, aap apne me khoobsurat hai. (no one told us that you are beautiful in the way you are). I was 19-20 when I came, and I had come from the mountains …having grown up on ghee, milk, bachcha hai…woh freshness thi…in my second show, my cheekbones used to be visible…my waist was snatched…but it wasn't that glowing effect…It took me a long time to get out of this cycle. I don't want that comparison on my children now…' Drawing on her experience, let's explore how body shaming can have a profound impact on people. Psychotherapist Delnna Rrajesh has worked with hundreds of women who still flinch when they look in the mirror. 'Not because they dislike their body. But because someone else told them they should,' said Delnna. In a world where a woman's worth is still measured in inches and filters, the scars of body-shaming often go unseen. 'But they run deep. Especially when the pressure comes during our most formative years – 19, 20, just stepping into adulthood. Instead of being welcomed with warmth, we are ridiculed, measured, starved into silence,' added Delnna, stressing that this isn't just about television or entertainment; it happens in school corridors, college classrooms, and our homes. 'Our body, which was once a vibrant, nourished, living expression of you, slowly becomes a battleground of punishment,' described Delnna. What happens when you're body-shamed? Psychologically, it creates a split between self and self-worth. You begin to look at your body not as a home, but as a problem to be fixed. The result? 'Soup-only diets. Overexercise. Social withdrawal. Shame spirals. And ironically… even after losing weight, many don't feel better. Because the issue was never the body. It was the emotional rejection. The pain of not being enough,' said Delnna. What's the healing antidote? *Reclaim your relationship with food – not as reward or punishment, but as nourishment. *Grieve the version of you that was unloved – especially when your younger self was told she was too much or too little. *Shift the focus from appearance to aliveness. *Ask yourself: What makes me feel radiant, not just look smaller? *And most importantly…stop outsourcing your confidence. 'Every time we base our self-worth on someone else's approval – a director, partner, parent, Instagram comments, etc. we abandon a part of ourselves,' said Delnna. 'Rubina's story is not just hers. It's a mirror for many women who were made to feel they had to change to be loved. But beauty is not created by diet. It's created by safety. By self-respect. By choosing to be gentle with your body… even when the world isn't,' Delnna said.
Indian Express
14-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Indian Express
Farah Khan says she wanted to get married in her 20s, is grateful to mother for stopping her: ‘You are my dushman…'
Reacting to the Rebel Kid, aka Apoorva Mukhija's wish to get married at 23, Farah Khan went down memory lane to recall how it was her late mother, Menaka Irani, who had stopped her from getting married at a very young age. '23 par kabhi nahi. At 23, I was going to get married. Mujhe laga ab life khatam hogayi hai…kya hi hai life mein…meri mummy ne mujhe bola ki agar tu shaadi karegi, main tujhe ghar se bahar phek dungi…and I cried…everyone else's mother wants them to get married and you are my dushman…(I thought there wasn't much to life except getting married. But my mom was against it. I revolted and said how everyone's mother wants their child to get married young but not you)…but today, I am grateful that I got married around 40. I am very happy, I have three beautiful children. And a good husband. At 40, you do whatever you want,' Khan told Mukhija on her YouTube cooking show. At the same time, Khan reiterated that there is no one particular timeline for milestones like marriage. Reflecting on the filmmaker's statement, Delnna Rrajesh, psychotherapist, and life coach, affirmed how we live in a society that often ties worth to timelines. 'There's an unspoken expectation to tick off life milestones – career, marriage, family, etc., by a certain age. But emotional readiness doesn't follow a clock, it follows clarity. And clarity comes through life experience, not social expectation,' said Delnna. According to her, emotional maturity is rarely present in our early twenties. 'At that age, we often mistake intensity for intimacy, validation for compatibility, and passion for partnership. But as we grow through heartbreak, setbacks, and career challenges, and in the process of healing, we begin to see love differently. We no longer crave the thrill of being chosen. We yearn for the safety of being seen,' said Delnna. Time, in this way, is not the enemy of love. 'Through our 30s and beyond, we learn what soft strength looks like. We learn how to sit with discomfort without reacting. We stop needing someone to complete us. We start looking for someone to walk beside us, in truth, in chaos, and in growth,' Delnna shared. So, when Khan says she's now happy with how her life unfolded, it's not just about gratitude. 'It's a celebration of growth because she didn't just find the right partner. She found herself first. This is the kind of wisdom that comes with age. It teaches you that timing isn't just about calendars-it's about consciousness. The older you grow, the more you stop asking, 'Am I late?' and start asking, 'Am I aligned?' That shift changes everything.' In relationships, this alignment manifests as healthier boundaries, deeper communication, and increased emotional safety. 'You're not falling in love to escape loneliness. You're choosing to love from a place of wholeness. And that kind of love? It lasts,' shared Delnna. So, according to Delnna, when you're clear within, your relationship isn't just a milestone. 'It's a movement toward conscious partnership, shared growth, and soulful connection. And that kind of love is always worth the wait,' Delnna said.
Indian Express
09-07-2025
- General
- Indian Express
Mahhi Vij says she is ‘very open' discussing sex, pleasure with partner: ‘But aaj madam ka mood hai'; psychotherapist on how couples can have such conversations
Mahhi Vij recently opened up about parenting, personal life, and more, saying how, in most cases, women can't speak freely and openly about sex and pleasure. Stressing that she can, the actor said, 'I am very open about it. If I feel like doing it, I will tell my partner, 'Dude, I want to do it today'. It's not like…figure it out. But aaj madam ka mood hai (The lady is in the mood today).' Speaking to Hauterrfly, she continued: 'I have a lot of friends whose husbands have to be in the mood first, but the women can't say that they are in the mood today. It is there. Aurat bol hi nahi sakti hai (women can't voice it)…this is what I am enjoying and this is what I like. I am very open about it. I am like that only.' Taking a cue from Vij's candid confession, let's understand why discussing sex and pleasure openly with your partner matters. In many Indian homes, sex is still the most intimate act, but the least spoken about. For women, especially, expressing desire remains wrapped in guilt, hesitation, or the fear of being judged, said Delnna Rrajesh, psychotherapist, energy healer, and life coach. Adding that silent suppression is often present, Delnna said, 'Strong women, nurturing, accomplished, still struggle to say to their partner, 'I feel desire.' I want closeness. I need affection tonight.' Not because they don't feel it, but because they were never taught that it's okay to own that need. For centuries, our culture has associated sexual expression with shame for women. The ideal Indian woman was trained to be silent, receptive, and passive. Desire was meant to be felt by the man, fulfilled by the woman – but never initiated or verbalised by her.' But the truth is: Sex is not a male need. It's a human one. 'Real intimacy thrives not in silence but in safety-emotional safety to speak, to express, to ask, and to say no,' continued Delnna. Here's what helps in shifting this for couples: *Create a space of trust where emotions and needs (not just sexual) can be expressed without judgment or mockery. *Start with emotional intimacy. Often, the safety of talking about sex comes when there's a strong emotional foundation. *Use gentle, honest language. It could be as simple as: 'I want to feel close to you tonight,' or 'I miss the intimacy we shared.' *Heal inner shame through therapy, inner child work, or energy healing, because most suppression begins long before adulthood. *Stop seeing it as taboo. 'The more we normalise desire, the healthier and more respectful our relationships become,' said Delnna. *Intimacy is not about performance. 'It's about presence, and communication is not about being bold. It's about being real. Every woman deserves a relationship where her needs are not just acknowledged, but honoured,' said Delnna.
Indian Express
02-07-2025
- Business
- Indian Express
When Sunjay Kapur chose ownership over management, said it was no less than giving up ego: ‘Wasn't an easy decision'
Sunjay Kapur, who passed away recently, once spoke about relinquishing his management role as CEO of his company, Sona Comstar, for ownership and how the transition wasn't an easy one, given that fragile egos were involved. 'So, I have given up management for ownership. I have transitioned from a manager to an owner. It wasn't an easy decision. I think one of the things that you need to let go of is your ego. The CEO of our business is better than I am. You need to realise that and should let someone else run the business,' the former Chairman of Sona Comstar told The Economic Times Digital in November 2024. The prominent industrialist, with an estimated net worth of $1.18 billion, ranked 2,623rd among the world's billionaires according to Forbes Billionaire Index. Reflecting on the same, Delnna Rrajesh, psychotherapist, energy healer and life coach, said that he wasn't just talking about a corporate strategy, but was describing a deep psychological shift that most high-achievers struggle to make. 'One that requires maturity, humility, and an unshakeable sense of self-worth,' she added. Because the truth is…control is addictive. 'For many entrepreneurs, founders, or leaders, the business becomes a part of their identity. Their decisions shape every detail; their instincts drive every milestone. But at some point, the same control that helped them build becomes the bottleneck that holds everyone back, including themselves. Letting go of that control can feel like losing relevance, losing power, or even losing purpose. But when done right, it is the exact opposite. It is evolution,' Delnna said. Psychologically, this shift activates growth on multiple levels: From self-worth to system-worth: Leaders who over-identify with daily operations often equate performance with personal value. But when you give up control, you're no longer validating your worth through constant doing. 'You start trusting the systems, people, and culture you've nurtured. That's where true legacy begins,' said Delnna. From micromanagement to vision stewardship: Managing is about tactics. 'Ownership is about stewardship. The mind shifts from checking tasks to building future value. This reduces cognitive load, increases creativity, and often restores the emotional bandwidth lost in endless firefighting,' shared Delnna. From ego to empathy: Recognising someone else might be a better manager isn't a weakness. Delnna asserted that it's wisdom. 'It means you've moved from needing to prove yourself to being able to empower others. This is leadership that uplifts, not outshines,' said Delnna. From anxiety to inner stability: Those deeply attached to control often carry a quiet, invisible anxiety, one that comes from constantly needing to hold everything together. 'What if they mess it up?', 'What if I'm not needed anymore?' But when you rewire your sense of control to be internal (mindset, intention, emotional regulation) instead of external (teams, tasks, outcomes), peace returns. You stop reacting and start responding, shared Delnna. From scarcity to abundance: The ego works in scarcity: 'If they rise, I fall.' 'Ownership thinks in abundance: 'When they rise, we all win.' Letting go allows space for fresh talent, new ideas, and exponential expansion,' Delnna shared. Sometimes, the most powerful upgrade isn't in doing more. 'It's in doing less, with deeper presence. Because leadership isn't just about staying in charge. It's about knowing when to step aside – so the vision becomes bigger than just one person,' said Delnna.
