Latest news with #ModernLove


New York Times
2 days ago
- Entertainment
- New York Times
‘Modern Love' Podcast: Therapist Meg Josephson on How to Stop Asking ‘Are You Mad at Me?'
Hosted by Anna Martin Produced by Reva GoldbergEmily LangAmy PearlSara CurtisElisa Gutierrez and Christina Djossa Produced and edited by Davis Land Engineered by Sonia Herrero Original music by Dan PowellPat McCuskerDiane Wong and Carole Sabouraud Edited by Jen Poyant 'Healing starts with awareness. We really can't heal anything until we're aware of it.' 'Am I in trouble?' 'Am I secretly bad?' These are questions Meg Josephson, a therapist and author, grew up asking herself. She was constantly trying to anticipate other people's needs, worried that she was letting other people down. And it wasn't until she found herself standing in the aisle of a Bed Bath & Beyond, trying to remember her favorite color, that she realized her desire to please everyone was eroding her sense of self. On this episode of Modern Love, Josephson talks about how that realization led her to confront her tumultuous childhood, and what it took to stop 'people pleasing.' She then reads the Modern Love essay 'My Three Years as a Beloved Daughter' by Erin Brown, about a woman who found a type of love in her best friend's parents that she had never experienced before, and what that taught her about her own parents. Josephson's book, 'Are You Mad At Me?,' is available Aug. 5, 2025. Here's how to submit a Modern Love essay to The New York Times. Here's how to submit a Tiny Love Story. Unlock full access to New York Times podcasts and explore everything from politics to pop culture. Subscribe today at or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Links to transcripts of episodes generally appear on these pages within a week. 'Modern Love' is hosted by Anna Martin and produced by Reva Goldberg, Emily Lang, Davis Land, Amy Pearl, Sara Curtis and Elisa Gutierrez. The show is edited by Lynn Levy and Jen Poyant, our executive producer. Production management is by Christina Djossa. The show is mixed by Daniel Ramirez and recorded by Maddy Masiello and Nick Pitman. It features original music by Pat McCusker, Elisheba Ittoop, Dan Powell, Marion Lozano, Carole Sabouraud, Aman Sahota, Chelsea Daniel, Sophia Lanman, Rowan Niemisto and Diane Wong. Our theme music is by Dan Powell. Special thanks to Daniel Jones, Miya Lee, Larissa Anderson, Dahlia Haddad, Lisa Tobin, Brooke Minters, Felice León, Dave Mayers, Eddie Costas, Sawyer Roque, Sophie Erickson, Mariya Abdulkaf, Mark Zemel, Pat Gunther, Mahima Chablani, Jeffrey Miranda, Isabella Anderson, Christine Nguyen, Reyna Desai, Jordan Cohen, Victoria Kim, Nina Lassam and Julia Simon. Thoughts? Email us at modernlovepodcast@ more from Modern Love? Read past stories. Watch the TV series and sign up for the newsletter. We also have swag at the NYT Store and two books, 'Modern Love: True Stories of Love, Loss and Redemption' and 'Tiny Love Stories: True Tales of Love in 100 Words or Less.'

RNZ News
21-07-2025
- Health
- RNZ News
Paying attention to giving people your full attention.
technology life and society 42 minutes ago We've all experienced that moment when someone glances at their phone mid-conversation and you suddenly feel invisible. Kiwis check our devices around 50 times an hour, and it's costing us more than we think. Psychiatrist and writer Dr. Samaiya Mushtaq says attention is a form of care, and when we lose it, we lose empathy too. She writes for Modern Love in the New York Times and on her Substack, The Middle Path. In a new essay she explores how distraction lets us dodge discomfort and why real connection starts with giving people your full attention. The title of the essay is How Much Control Do We Have Over What We Pay Attention To? Dr Mushtaq spoke to Jesse.


Hindustan Times
16-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Hindustan Times
Cristin Milotti on receiving Emmy nomination for The Penguin: ‘Deeply thrilled by the amount of recognition we got'
American actor Cristin Milioti is soaking in the moment after earning her first-ever Emmy nomination for playing Sofia Falcone in The Penguin. The actor, known for performances in Black Mirror, Modern Love, and Made for Love, has finally landed in the spotlight for her portrayal in the gritty Gotham-set limited series — and her reaction is as sweet as it is sincere. Cristin Milioti plays the role of Sofia Falcone in The Penguin(Evan Agostini/Invision/AP) In multiple interviews with Deadline and Indiewire, the 39-year-old actor admitted she kept her nerves in check by 'purposefully keeping' her phone at the bottom of her bag until the nominations were officially revealed. She didn't want to build up any expectations — but once she found out she had been nominated, her reaction was simple and heartfelt. 'It was definitely that I can't wait to have a big dessert as a treat later. I am so thrilled at the amount of nominations that The Penguin got,' she said. 'I'm thrilled for our directors, my fellow actors, our writers, our hair and makeup team, the visual effects team and the editors. This show took so many people to make this show what it is. You never know who's going to get recognized, so I'm just so deeply thrilled about the amount of recognition we got,' Cristin added. In total, The Penguin scored 24 nominations, including nods for Colin Farrell in Lead Actor in a Limited or Anthology Series, Outstanding Limited or Anthology Series, Directing, Cinematography, Contemporary Hairstyling and Makeup, and Outstanding Prosthetic Makeup. Cristin's performance in particular earned her a spot in the Outstanding Lead Actress in a Limited Series or Movie category, alongside Cate Blanchett (Disclaimer), Michelle Williams (Dying for Sex), Rashida Jones (Black Mirror), and Meghann Fahy (Sirens). Reflecting on her work, Cristin said, "I am so happy that I was on two shows that I loved being a part of getting recognized today. It's very cool. All of that work on The Penguin was totally worth it. Even without any of these additional bells and whistles... to be recognized in this way for the show was so lovely and validating. But it was already so deeply meaningful to have had that experience and so deeply worth it because I truly had a profound time making that show and playing Sofia, for sure." It's clear that the role left a lasting impression on her as an actor. "I definitely have been spoiled by this show because I just got to do so much with that role, and so much of what I got to do are things that I've been wanting to do and wishing to do for a long time. So, it's definitely affected what I signed on to just because I got spoiled by Lauren LeFranc's writing, our production and by my fellow actors and crew. I'm definitely trying to seek out things that are for sure different tone-wise, but if I can to the best of my ability, I would love to be a part of more things that I love, just as much as I love The Penguin and that experience."


New York Times
16-07-2025
- Entertainment
- New York Times
‘Modern Love' Podcast: How to Keep Love Alive, With Rob Delaney of ‘Dying for Sex'
Hosted by Anna Martin Produced by Reva GoldbergEmily LangDavis LandChristina DjossaAmy Pearl and Sara Curtis Edited by Jen Poyant and Davis Land Engineered by Sonia Herrero Original music by Dan PowellElisheba IttoopMarion LozanoRowan Niemisto and Carole Sabouraud 'It doesn't matter that your partner's a grown-up, it doesn't matter that they were self-sufficient before they met you, and could survive without you. When you're with them, you must tend to that person and that relationship.' When we meet Rob Delaney's character, 'Neighbor Guy,' in FX's limited series 'Dying for Sex,' he's scarfing down a burrito in an elevator, dripping food on his face and the floor. But Delaney's performance reveals that under Neighbor Guy's messy exterior is a man capable of deep vulnerability and empathy. 'Dying for Sex' follows a woman named Molly, played by Michelle Williams, who is dying of cancer and desperate to experience sexual pleasure before it's too late. At first, Molly thinks Neighbor Guy is disgusting, but the two soon discover they make sense together, sexually and emotionally. Williams and Delaney received Emmy nominations for their roles. Today, Delaney tells host Anna Martin why exposing the messy and painful parts of ourselves to other people can be rewarding and hilarious. He talks about tending his own relationship and reads a Modern Love essay about a couple who decides to try some role play to avoid getting too comfortable with each other. Here's how to submit a Modern Love essay to The New York Times. Here's how to submit a Tiny Love Story. Unlock full access to New York Times podcasts and explore everything from politics to pop culture. Subscribe today at or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Links to transcripts of episodes generally appear on these pages within a week. 'Modern Love' is hosted by Anna Martin and produced by Reva Goldberg, Emily Lang, Davis Land, Amy Pearl and Sara Curtis. The show is edited by Davis Land and Jen Poyant, our executive producer. Production management is by Christina Djossa. The show is mixed by Daniel Ramirez and recorded by Maddy Masiello, Nick Pitman, John Hazell and Laughing Around Studios. It features original music by Elisheba Ittoop, Dan Powell, Marion Lozano, Carole Sabouraud and Rowan Niemisto. Our theme music is by Dan Powell. Special thanks to Daniel Jones, Miya Lee, Larissa Anderson, Dahlia Haddad, Lisa Tobin, Brooke Minters, Felice León, Dave Mayers, Eddie Costas, Sawyer Roque, Sophie Erickson, Mariya Abdulkaf, Mark Zemel, Pat Gunther, Mahima Chablani, Caterina Cleric, Jeffrey Miranda, Isabella Anderson, Christine Nguyen, Reyna Desai, Jordan Cohen, Victoria Kim, Nina Lassam and Julia Simon. Thoughts? Email us at modernlovepodcast@ more from Modern Love? Read past stories. Watch the TV series and sign up for the newsletter. We also have swag at the NYT Store and two books, 'Modern Love: True Stories of Love, Loss and Redemption' and 'Tiny Love Stories: True Tales of Love in 100 Words or Less.'


New York Times
15-07-2025
- General
- New York Times
Where Have Men Gone? We're Right Here.
In her June 20 Modern Love essay, 'Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back,' Rachel Drucker lamented an absence of men in the dating arena. At a restaurant with a longtime male friend, she noticed that hardly any men were out with women, a retreat from intimacy she already had observed elsewhere in public and in her personal life. Why, she wondered, are so many men no longer showing up for relationships? Rachel brought professional insight to the issue, having worked at Playboy for more than a decade, where she learned about the monetization of men's desire, what drew them in and kept them coming back. 'It wasn't intimacy,' she writes. 'It wasn't mutuality. It was access to stimulation — clean, fast and frictionless.' Her essay led to an extraordinary amount of reader email, nearly all from men. Here is a selection, edited for length and clarity. Rachel Drucker's essay captures a real and painful longing — for presence, reciprocity and emotional connection. But if men are retreating, it's not out of indifference. It's often out of exhaustion and confusion. Dating today places enormous and conflicting demands on men. We're still expected to pay for dates, take the lead and demonstrate confidence — while also being emotionally available, deferential and self-aware. The goal posts shift constantly, and women's expectations are often unstated or contradictory. Emotional openness in men is encouraged in theory but penalized in practice. And the risk of being misjudged, misquoted or shamed online makes genuine vulnerability feel dangerous. Many of us want connection, but not at the cost of constant anxiety about saying or doing the wrong thing. If we're to 'come back,' as the essay pleads, it has to be to a space of mutual grace and clarity. The new normal hasn't been defined yet. We need to create it together. Jonathan Stowe Charlottesville, Va. Perhaps men and women are in a holding pattern, and we don't know what's next. But as a white, urban, married father of two late teen boys, I can say it's an increasingly daunting task to meet the ever-changing expectations of what a man should be. According to women but, more important, according to ourselves and our self worth. No one should feel sorry for us — but nor should they complain when we become introspective and quietly check our guts when deciding how to proceed. Morgan Clark Studio City, Calif. I think what's going on is that for the past 10-20 years, men and boys have been marginalized, probably in response to women being marginalized before that. It feels like punishment but for something that current men never did, at least not consciously or intentionally. Everything in the culture says: women good, men bad. What I think Ms. Drucker is asking for is leadership and confidence in men. But we've been told that those are toxic traits. So, here we are. Justin Hornburg Bloomfield, Mich. Want all of The Times? Subscribe.