Latest news with #attachmentparenting
The Sun
21-06-2025
- Entertainment
- The Sun
We're raising our children without rules – they don't have a bed time and they only go to school if they want to
A COUPLE who are raising their children without rules have shared an insight into their everyday life. The family-of-five described themselves as "unconventional", with the young children allowed to set their own schedules each day. Adele and Matt spoke to the YouTube channel the Truly Show about their unique approach to parenting. The Brighton-based pair shared 11-year-old son Ulysses and daughters Astara, six, and Kai, three. All three children are being raised with "no strict rules" in any aspect of their lives, including meal times, bed times, and school. "The children listen to their bodily cues, they sleep when they're tired, eat when they're hungry," said Matt. He joked that this does mean that their diets include a lot of "junk food", such as crisps, cookies, chocolate, and pizza. Matt clarified that their "unconventional parenting" style was about giving their children the freedom to choose. This began at a young age as the kids decided when they wanted to stop breast-feeding and co-sleeping with their parents. While their oldest son co-slept until the age of 11 and stopped breast-feeding around six, his younger sister was happy to move into her own room at five and quit breast-feeding the year before that. Meanwhile the youngest Kai still sleeps in her parents' bed at three and continues to breast-feed, with Adele saying she didn't see either ceasing any time soon. This feeds into the couple's main parenting philosophy which involves attachment parenting their children when they are young as well as practicing gentle parenting. How one poly couple make it work while raising teenage sons This close relationship is continued all the time as the children do not attend school. Instead, Adele and Matt use an "unschooling" technique at home, though they clarified this is not considered homeschooling. According to them, it lets the child lead what they learn, with nature playing a huge part in their education The family even have a garden farm, which includes a flock of chickens and roosters, as well as rabbits and dogs. "We do not worry about them not being in school, I'd worry about what they'd miss out on if they weren't in school actually," Adele said. Different parenting techniques Here are some widely recognised methods: Authoritative Parenting This technique will often foster independence, self-discipline, and high self-esteem in children. It is often considered the most effective, this technique is where parents set clear expectations - enforcing rules - whilst also showing warmth and support. Authoritarian Parenting This is opposite to authoritative parenting, as it is where the parent sets high demands but is low on responsiveness. It involves ensuring the child is obedient and often employ punitive measures. While this can lead to disciplined behaviour, it may also result in lower self-esteem and social skills in children. Permissive Parenting Permissive parents tend to be indulgent and lenient, often taking on a role more akin to a friend than an authority figure. They are highly responsive but lack demandingness, granting children a lot of freedom. This method can nurture creativity and a free-spirited nature but may also result in poor self-regulation and difficulties with authority. Uninvolved Parenting Uninvolved or neglectful parenting is marked by low responsiveness and low demands. Parents in this category offer minimal guidance, nurturing, or attention. This often leaves children feeling neglected, which can have significant negative effects on their emotional and social development. Helicopter Parenting Helicopter parents are extremely involved and overprotective, frequently micromanaging their children's lives. Although their goal is to protect and support, this approach can hinder a child's ability to develop independence and problem-solving skills. Free-Range Parenting Free-range parenting encourages children to explore and learn from their surroundings with minimal parental interference. This method promotes independence and resilience but requires a safe and supportive environment to be successful. Attachment Parenting According to Attachment parenting focuses on physical closeness and emotional bonding, often through practices such as co-sleeping and baby-wearing. This approach aims to create secure attachments and emotional well-being, but demands significant time and emotional commitment from parents. Each of these parenting techniques has its own set of strengths and weaknesses. The key is to find a balanced approach that aligns with the family's values and meets the child's needs for a healthy, happy upbringing. "A conventional education I would say is definitely failing a large majority of children right now." Astara shared her hopes to learn how to write when she's turns "seven or eight" but in the meantime she is focused on things like gymnastics and ballet. As well as "outside school", the couple's unconventional parenting approaching also relates to medical care. They opt to "respect our children's bodily autonomy" and try to steer clear of vaccines and medication unless absolutely neccessary. Instead, they use alternative forms of care, such as herbal teas and extracts or "anything holistic without outside effects". And as for how they invision their children's futures, the couple said they are with whatever lifestyle they choose when they grow up. 2
Yahoo
19-06-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
What Is Attachment Parenting? An Expert Explains the Principles, and the Pros and Cons
Maybe you have a bun in the oven and are doing your research on all things parenting before baby arrives. Or perhaps you're testing the waters with different parenting styles in real time. Or maybe you're just curious about the choices your sister-in-law is making—co-sleeping? Breastfeeding well past a year? Either way, you might have heard of an approach called attachment parenting. So, what is attachment parenting, exactly? I spoke to a mental health expert to learn more on the benefits and disadvantages of this super responsive parenting style, and here's what I learned. Dr. Sanam Hafeez is a New York City-based neuropsychologist and director of Comprehend the Mind, a psychological practice that treats learning disorders, anxiety, depression and other psychopathological disorders. Dr. Hafeez obtained her Doctor of Psychology at Hofstra University and completed her post-doctoral training in neuropsychology and developmental pediatrics at Coney Island Hospital. Dr. Hafeez tells me that attachment parenting is a method of raising children that emphasizes building a close, trusting relationship: 'It encourages parents to be physically close and emotionally available, especially when the child is very young. Parents who follow this approach often breastfeed, carry their babies in slings, and sleep near them at night. The idea is that when a child feels safe and understood, they grow up more secure and confident.' That said, the expert also wants parents to know that this approach isn't about abiding by strict rules; instead, it encourages parents to listen to their gut and respond to their child's needs. (For example, a parent might choose to hold their baby during naps instead of putting them in a crib, so the baby feels more connected.) Attachment parenting also isn't right for every parent: 'Some people find it highly rewarding, while others find it exhausting,' says Dr. you're interested in practicing the attachment parenting style, the first principle encourages you to get a head start. This principle suggests that parents should 'learn about childbirth and early parenting, make informed choices, and reflect on their own childhoods to break unhealthy cycles,' says Dr. Hafeez. 'This principle focuses on breastfeeding when possible, but more broadly it means being emotionally present and responsive during feeding,' says Dr. Hafeez. In other words, you can still practice attachment parenting even if you are unable or choose not to breastfeed; the most important part is that you keep in mind that feeding time should 'provide emotional connection, not just nutrition.' Per the expert, parents are encouraged to notice and respond quickly and compassionately to their child's cues—namely because this helps the child feel understood, safe, and valued. Per the expert, attachment parenting credo emphasizes physical closeness like holding, cuddling, and baby-wearing—namely because 'gentle touch promotes bonding and can soothe stress for both parent and child.' Thinking about trying a CIO sleep-training method to get your baby to sleep through the night? Well, according to the principles of attachment parenting, that's a no-no. 'Babies should sleep in a safe environment that allows them to feel secure, which is why co-sleeping or room-sharing is often recommended to maintain emotional connection while prioritizing physical safety,' says Dr. Hafeez. That said, it's worth noting that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends room-sharing rather co-sleeping (i.e., bed-sharing), due to the increased risk of SIDS during the first six months. 'Children thrive on predictable, attentive care from loving caregivers. When possible, attachment parenting encourages minimizing long separations and choosing caregivers who are warm and responsive,' says Dr. Hafeez. But what constitutes a long separation, you ask? Attachment Parenting International (API) points to research that shows kids under the age of 30 months experience stress when left in daycare situations for more than 20 hours per week. As such API recommends that working caregivers find an at-home childcare alternative, either with another parent or a private caregiver, and that an effort is made to maintain consistency in the arrangement so that the child can form secure attachments with the person providing care while you're away. (i.e., try not to swap nannies all the time). Attachment parenting promotes positive discipline because it has been proven to be more effective than other methods, such as fear-based approaches (i.e., threats) and physical discipline. Dr. Hafeez explains: 'instead of punishment, this approach promotes teaching and guiding with empathy and respect. The goal is to help children understand boundaries and learn self-control through connection, not fear.' What this looks like depends on the situation, but generally attachment parenting encourages kids to learn from natural consequences and practice peaceful conflict resolution skills when problems arise. This means, as it sounds, that you should aim to achieve a healthy balance between your personal well-being and your family responsibilities. 'It is essential to be a responsive parent but you must also take care of yourself,' says Dr. Hafeez, adding that, 'parents must prioritize their emotional and physical self-care to ensure effective and sustainable parenting practices.' In other words, an attachment parenting style does not mean that you have to sacrifice all of your own needs; in fact, if you neglect yourself, both you and your child will suffer. CatherineThis highly attentive and nurturing parenting style involves modeling desirable social behaviors to children from a very young age. Indeed, the expert says that 'responsive parenting leads children to develop an awareness of others' emotions and greater empathy.' Basically, this approach means that your kid will be less likely to pull little Suzy's pigtails and more likely to comfort her if someone else does. Yep, the emphasis on co-sleeping or room-sharing does lead to improved sleep patterns. Don't get too excited, though, because the benefit is mostly for your baby: 'Though early co-sleeping can disrupt adult sleep, children often develop more secure and healthy sleep patterns over time because they learn to associate sleep with comfort and safety' explains Dr. Hafeez. While you might think this parenting approach would result in a kid who remains attached to you at the hip for far longer than you'd like, apparently this isn't necessarily the case. 'Ironically, the intense dependence in early years fosters greater independence later on,' says Dr. Hafeez—namely because 'children who feel secure are more willing to explore their environment and try new things without fear.' FatCamera/Getty Images Attachment parenting certainly has its pros, but it's not exactly easy to practice. Indeed, the expert notes that one of the most significant disadvantages of this parenting approach is that you can get really burnt out trying to maintain it. 'The constant physical and emotional availability required can be exhausting, especially for primary caregivers. Without adequate rest or personal time, parents may experience stress, resentment, or fatigue.' As such, if you decide to adopt an attachment parenting style, you'd be wise to remember the eighth principle (which, in my opinion, should be the first). Attachment parenting really demands that a tremendous amount of attention be paid to the child at all times and, as a result, other relationships might fall by the wayside. The job of attachment parenting might be a labor of love, but it doesn't always feel that way between spouses. 'When one parent is always attending to the child, romantic and emotional intimacy between partners can suffer, which may create tension or disconnect in the relationship,' notes Dr. Hafeez. The expert also points out that certain aspects of attachment parenting, such as extended breastfeeding and bed-sharing, might be misunderstood and criticized by others. For what it's worth, I didn't practice attachment parenting in its purest form with my kids (they were both sleep trained) but I did breastfeed them both for over two years and there were definitely people in my orbit who found that weird. Bottom line: if you go the full-blown attachment parenting route, you can probably expect at least one member of your extended family to scoff at you a little. Pros and cons aside, the expert points out that this parenting style simply might not be doable for everyone. 'Single parents, working parents, or those without strong support systems may find the demands of attachment parenting unrealistic,' explains Dr. Hafeez, adding that 'the time and energy required can be a significant barrier.' If you're interested in attachment parenting and have an arrangement that's conducive to it, then, by all means, give it a shot. In order to decide whether or not it's right for you, you should first consider the unique needs and limitations of your family. And keep in mind that if it feels like too big a burden for you to adhere to completely, there's no harm in borrowing any and all of the ideas you can realistically apply and leaving the rest behind. From my experience, there's no perfect parenting dogma you can find.
The Sun
04-06-2025
- Entertainment
- The Sun
Kourtney Kardashian slammed as ‘insane' for controversial parenting move & even sister Khloe thinks it's ‘crazy'
KOURTNEY Kardashian has been slammed by fans as 'insane' and 'dysfunctional' after sharing her controversial parenting style. The 46-year-old reality TV star even left her sister and mum-of-two Khloe, 40, stunned by her 'crazy' claims. 4 4 4 4 On a recent episode of Khloe Kardashian's new podcast, Khloe in Wonder Land, the mum-of-four got candid on her ' attachment style parenting '. Attachment parenting is a child-rearing philosophy centred around building a strong emotional bond between a parent and child. It emphasises empathy, responsiveness and close physical and emotional connection, especially during infancy and early childhood. There is also a strong importance placed on breastfeeding, baby-wearing, avoiding 'baby training' and responding with sensitivity. The Kardashians star who tied the knot with Travis Barker back in 2022 and gave birth to their son, Rocky Thirteen Barker, on November 1, 2023, at a hospital in Los Angeles, admitted that contact naps are of high importance to her and baby Rocky. 19 months after Rocky's birth, not only does Kourtney still sleep in the same room as him, but she even holds him for all of his naps too. Revealing all on her 'attachment style parenting', Kourtney shared: 'One thing I did differently this time, I've always shared a bed with the other kids, but we share a room with Rocky.' When it comes to defining attachment style parenting, Kourtney added: 'I think it's not separating for as much as possible in the first three years. 'It really helps nurture their secure attachment. It's just what my instincts tell me and what they tell me to do.' Unlike Khloe, who is mother to True, six, and Tatum, two, Kourtney 'doesn't really have a schedule' with her 19-month-old baby. Kourtney Kardashian scolded over parenting style with baby Rocky as fans rage 'be thankful for your privilege' Kourtney told her sister: 'You are very scheduled and planned out - activities, outfits, bedtimes, food. 'We have a general time but as babies, we have no schedule. Rocky doesn't really have a schedule. 'Today we got up at 7am, made breakfast for the kids and they got out the door and I noticed he was so tired at around 8:30am, and so we nursed in bed and he went to sleep. We go with the flow.' It really helps nurture their secure attachment. It's just what my instincts tell me Kourtney Kardashian Not only this, but Kourtney also admitted: 'With the attachment style parenting, I hold him for his naps. The whole time.' To this, Khloe gasped: 'Wow, that's crazy to me.' Kourtney then confirmed: 'He's 23lbs…Once he took a nap for five hours. There are four recognised styles of parenting explained below: Authoritarian Parenting What some might describe as "regimental" or "strict" parenting. Parents with this style focus on strict rules, obedience, and discipline. Authoritarian parents take over the decision-making power, rarely giving children any input in the matter. When it comes to rules, you believe it's "my way or the highway". Permissive Parenting Often referred to as "soft parenting" or "yes mums/dads". Permissive parents are lenient, only stepping in when there's a serious problem. They're quite forgiving and they adopt an attitude of "kids will be kids". Oftentimes they act more like friends than authoritative figures. Authoritative Parenting Authoritative parents provide their children with rules and boundaries, but they also give them the freedom to make decisions. With an authoritative parenting style, parents validate their children's feelings while also making it clear that the adults are ultimately in charge. They use positive reinforcement techniques, like praise and reward systems, as opposed to harsh punishments. Neglectful or Uninvolved Parenting Essentially, neglectful parents ignore their children, who receive little guidance, nurturing, and parental attention. They don't set rules or expectations, and they tend to have minimal knowledge about what their children are doing. Uninvolved parents expect children to raise themselves. They don't devote much time or energy to meeting children's basic needs. Uninvolved parents may be neglectful but it's not always intentional. A parent with mental health issues or substance abuse problems, for example, may not be able to care for a child's physical or emotional needs consistently. 'I'll sit in our little chair and I still have my little breastfeeding pillow so he'll lay on there and my arm is under. 'Then I have a little radiation blanket that I put over to protect from EMFs from phone use. 'I'll do extended breastfeeding, co-sleeping.' Fans react But social media users were left stunned by Kourtney's 'crazy' style of parenting and many eagerly raced to share their thoughts. One person said: "The luxury of being rich. Can afford to sit there for three to five hours. Maids, nannies, etc to help with the house and other kids.' Another added: 'I love it how Kourtney talks as if she's a wonderful mother as if we don't all know how dysfunctional her three other children are.' A third commented: 'That is crazy!!' Whilst someone else slammed: 'I'm sorry but that's ridiculous.' Despite this, other parents confessed that they too have a similar parenting style to Kourtney. One mother explained: 'I've held my son for every nap for the past two years and I have no nanny, no maids, no money. It's definitely possible, especially if you only have one baby!' A second chimed in: 'With my first baby I would contact nap and I'd sit in the living room holding him while he slept.' Meanwhile, another parent admitted: 'I nap with my 21-month-old for two hours a day. It's amazing. I love it.'
Daily Mail
24-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Kourtney Kardashian's reveals she cradles her son Rocky, 18-months, for five hours while he sleeps - as fans share complaint over her admission
Kourtney Kardashian has admitted that she cradles her son Rocky for up to five hours while he sleeps - sparking complaints among her fanbase. The TV personality, 46, shares the 18-month old with her husband Travis Barker, and recently discussed her 'attachment style parenting'. Speaking on the latest episode of her sister Khloe's podcast, she explained how she just 'goes with the flow' when it comes to want her baby son wants. As she compared her parenting to her sister's, she said: 'You are very scheduled and planned out throughout the whole day, like activities, outfits, all the things. We're just kind of go with the flow. 'And, also with the attachment style parenting, I hold him for his naps.' From A-list scandals and red carpet mishaps to exclusive pictures and viral moments, subscribe to the DailyMail's new Showbiz newsletter to stay in the loop. Kourtney shared that she once held Rocky for five hours, and added: 'I'll sit in my little chair, usually in the room. 'Then I still have my little breastfeeding pillow, and he'll kind of lay on there with my arms under, and then I have a little radiation blanket that I put over to protect from EMFs.' Sharing their thoughts, fans wrote: 'Sounds like someone with nothing else to do.... Maids, cooks, chauffeurs, nannies...'; 'Must be nice to have nothing else to do'; 'Honestly if I had help I would hold my baby too! But momma gotta cook, clean & laundry!'; 'If you are going to have a privilege, this should be the one! Lovely. I had to clean, wash, cook and and and...'; 'Tell me money isn't an issue without telling me money isn't an issue.' Meanwhile, others added: 'If I knew then what I know now I would've done this more often. They grow up fast and moments like that don't last very long'; 'They're only little for so long! If I could I'd go back and do this more!!'; 'Those times were my favorite'; 'I did the same! Nothing wrong with that. It's one of the best things during that stage. Plus, they nap better and longer in your arms!'; 'They're only little once. No regrets! Did the same thing.' It's not the first time that Kourtney has been slammed by fans for being 'out of touch.' The reality star talked about her kids and how they wanted to do homeschooled - versus going to a school - which fans slammed on social media, calling her 'out of touch.' 'Why do kids f*****g go to school?' Kourtney said, adding that it is 'dated.' Kourtney also revealed that she only works once a week - something she decided on after giving birth to son Rocky: 'I had a strong desire to not work and stay home and be with the kids, which is... I would say probably like once a week I'll work.' Kourtney shares three kids with ex-partner Scott Disick: sons Mason, 15, and Reign, 10, and daughter Penelope, 12. She welcomed son Rocky on November 1, 2023 with husband Travis Barker. Travis has two children from his past marriage to Shanna Moakler: Landon, 21, and Alabama, 19 - as well as his former stepdaughter Atiana De La Hoya, 26, whom he helped raise. Atiana is the daughter of Shanna and Oscar De La Hoya. 'Living authentically is not conforming to whatever it is and whether for me- there's so many ways. There's ways we function as a family. Like if someone does the same thing every day. I do it with everything. It's not about our family. Let's say the school system. I'll think, why do kids f*****g go to school? Truly. It's so dated,' Kourtney said in the podcast. 'I'm such a home school person so don't even get me going,' Khloe added. Kourtney explained: 'So then I'll start thinking... and then like my kids will start sending me videos why do kids to school. It will be like really successful people and they'll be like my kids never go to school and they're never going to. And I'm like, what's the goal here. You want to do homeschool? Ok let's do it.
Daily Mail
23-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Kourtney Kardashian's criticized for cradling son for hours as he sleeps
Kourtney Kardashian has admitted that she cradles her son Rocky for up to five hours while he sleeps - sparking complaints. The star, 46, shares the 18-month-old with her husband, Travis Barker, and recently discussed her 'attachment style parenting'. Speaking on the latest episode of her sister Khloe Kardashian 's podcast, she revealed she 'goes with the flow' when it comes to what her son wants. Comparing her parenting style to Khloe's, Kourtney said: 'You are very scheduled and planned out throughout the day, activities, outfits, all the things. We just kind of go with the flow. 'Also with the attachment style parenting, I hold him for his naps.' Kourtney said she once held Rocky for five hours, and added: 'I'll sit in my little chair, usually in the room. 'Then I still have my little breastfeeding pillow, and he'll kind of lay on there with my arms under, and then I have a little radiation blanket that I put over to protect from EMFs.' Fans were quick to share their thoughts, with one person writing: 'Sounds like someone has nothing else to do... Maids, cooks, Chauffeurs, nannies,' while another added: 'Must be nice.' Another said: 'Honestly, if I had help I would hold my baby too! But momma gotta cook, clean, and [do] laundry.' Someone else noted: 'Tell me money isn't an issue without telling me money isn't an issue.' But others said they wished they could go back to that stage, with one person writing: 'I did the same! Nothing wrong with that. It's one of the best things during that stage. Plus, they nap better and longer in your arms.'
