Latest news with #connection
Forbes
9 hours ago
- General
- Forbes
3 Mistakes To Avoid Before A First Date, By A Psychologist
It's easy to stress over first impressions, but the biggest blocks to genuine connection are ... More internal. Here are three mistakes to avoid before a first date. First dates often come with a mix of feelings, varying from excitement to nervousness. Many people struggle with the internal pressure to ensure everything goes perfectly. However, in the desire for things to go as planned, you may place unnecessary weight on how the date should unfold. This can unintentionally set you up for stress, constant overanalysis or even disappointment. How your first date will go tends to depend more on your internal state than all the external effort you put into it. The way you show up is usually shaped by what you expect, believe or fear going in. The mindset with which you walk into a first date matters more than you think. Contrary to what many people may believe, first dates do not have to be perfect. It is important to remember that the first date is simply an opportunity to see if there's a genuine connection. What truly helps is showing up with presence and a willingness to stay grounded in your truth. This will help you evaluate the situation better, as well as the person in front of you, a little more objectively. With that in mind, here are three mistakes to avoid before the first date and how avoiding them can make all the difference. 1. Going In With Preconceived Assumptions When you show up to a date with a fixed narrative or a preconceived notion, say, by imagining that your date is 'the one' or assuming how they'll behave, you're only interacting with your idea of them, and you might inadvertently shut off the possibility of getting to know them for who they are. In a 2021 study published in Current Psychology, researchers looked at how people form expectations about someone before meeting them, especially through information gathered online, for instance, their social media or their dating profile. The researchers wanted to know if these expectations affect how you feel about someone after you meet them. They studied the interactions of 71 pairs of people and collected their expectations before they interacted. Then, the pairs had a structured self-disclosure conversation over Skype (video chat), simulating a first meeting or first date. Researchers found that pre-interaction expectations did influence how people felt during and after the interaction. If someone expected to like the other person, they did end up liking them more. If expectations were low, their reactions often stayed aligned with that stance. Even seeing someone's face before talking to them didn't change the impact of the pre-formed impression. What they thought beforehand shaped how they interpreted everything. Interestingly, researchers also found that participants underestimated how much they were liked by the other person. This reflects a common psychological bias called the 'liking gap,' which means you may often assume you're less liked than you are, especially in new interactions. This can trigger unnecessary self-doubt or make you 'give up' on a connection prematurely. This research highlights how you need to try meeting someone with a clean slate. Let go of the mental scripts or expectations created from their Instagram highlights or clever texts. Let curiosity be your guide rather than the assumptions you have formed. This openness will allow you to truly see the person and be seen in return. 2. Rushing Into Quick Intimacy It's natural to want to build a connection quickly on a first date. While vulnerability creates closeness, it is important to remember that oversharing too soon can create emotional whiplash. There's a difference between being open and emotionally dumping in the name of bonding. This is often a result of accelerated intimacy, where people reveal highly personal information too early, often in an attempt to fast-track emotional closeness. Even though it may feel like bonding in the moment, it can very easily overwhelm the other person or create a false sense of depth that may not be grounded in trust. Self-disclosure, however, works best when it's balanced. This is backed by research. A study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology looked at how reciprocity in self-disclosure (i.e., taking turns opening up) affects how much people like each other, especially when they're meeting for the first time. The researchers brought together strangers (who had never met before) and put them into pairs. These pairs participated in structured conversations involving personal questions. There were two main groups. First was the reciprocal disclosure group, where both people took turns asking and answering personal questions. The second group was the non-reciprocal disclosure group, where one person did most of the sharing, while the other mainly listened. Then, in a second round, they switched roles. Researchers found that people in the reciprocal group felt more liking, closeness and similarity after the first interaction. Even when the non-reciprocal pairs switched roles later, they still didn't feel as connected as those who had taken turns sharing from the beginning. So, it wasn't just about both people sharing eventually; rather, it was about the way sharing was structured right from the start. This research highlights that balanced and mutual self-disclosure creates deeper connection, especially in early interactions. If one person talks a lot about themselves without allowing space for the other to share, the connection may feel one-sided or overwhelming. This is a reminder that instead of trying to impress with depth, you must aim to connect with presence. Let the conversation flow naturally by being present and letting trust build gradually, even in the silences. 3. Making The Outcome Too Important You might have many hopes tied to a first date, especially if you've been looking forward to it or feel emotionally invested in the other person. This can make the outcome seem too important, which leads to the date feeling more like an audition and less like a conversation. If your self-worth gets entangled with how the date goes, you might end up overperforming, overanalyzing or freezing up entirely. This may stop you from being fully present. You may instead start monitoring yourself and the other person for signs of success or failure. This can create unnecessary pressure. A 2024 study published in Development and Psychopathology explored how the fear of being evaluated, both negatively (being judged or rejected) and positively (being noticed or praised), affects social anxiety and emotional regulation in adolescents. Traditionally, psychologists have focused on the fear of negative evaluation (FNE), but this study highlights a newer concept, which is the 'fear of positive evaluation' (FPE). This is the discomfort or anxiety people feel even when they receive compliments or positive attention because it can raise expectations or make them feel exposed. The study followed 684 adolescents over six months and looked at how these fears interacted with acceptance (being okay with how you feel), suppression (trying to hide or block emotions) and rumination (overthinking or dwelling on things). People who struggled to accept their emotions were more likely to develop a fear of positive evaluation (FPE), where even praise made them anxious. Those who suppressed emotions (hid how they felt) were more prone to social anxiety. Social anxiety led to more rumination, meaning they kept overanalyzing their interactions, often long after they were over. This study reveals that the fear of being evaluated, whether positively or negatively, can trigger anxiety, emotional suppression and overthinking, especially in high-stakes social situations like a first date. In short, when you try too hard to be liked, it can actually make it harder for you to connect. This is because it disconnects you from your emotional ease and authenticity. Remember to show up to connect, not to perform. This way you'll create space for something real to unfold. Showing Up Authentically A first date is merely an opportunity to meet both the other person and yourself in a new context. The goal here isn't to perform perfectly or win someone over. It is much better to go in with the intention to show up fully as you are and allow the interaction to unfold in its natural rhythm, rather than forcing it to match what you expected or imagined it should be. When you think of showing up authentically, it is important to remember that it is more about being present enough to respond and not react, and being self-aware enough to notice when you're trying to be liked instead of being real. Your most magnetic quality is your comfort with yourself. When you're at ease, open and not tangled in outcomes, the conversation will flow and it will be easier for you to discern if there's alignment. So, try to take the pressure off and remember that you don't need to 'be' anything; you just need to come as you are and give the other person the space to show up as their authentic selves too. Are you showing up authentically in your relationships? Take this science-backed test to find out: Authenticity In Relationships Scale
UAE Moments
2 days ago
- Entertainment
- UAE Moments
♒ Aquarius Daily Horoscope for June 26, 2025
Normal? Never heard of her. You're here to remix reality. Aquarius, June 26 is dialed into your frequency. Your thoughts are ten steps ahead, your vibe is a walking brainstorm, and your presence? Electric. Whether you're pitching something wild, connecting the dots in a way no one else can, or just confusing people (in a charming way), you're in your element. ⚡ Energy Check: Visionary, Vivid & Unfiltered Your brain is buzzing with what-ifs and why-nots, and you're not in the mood to stick to the script. That's your power. Use it to start a conversation that shifts the vibe or a project that shifts the future. Aquarius Tip: Don't wait for approval. You're here to lead, not follow. 💼 Career & Money: The Disruptor's Advantage Your originality is a magnet today. A sudden insight could lead to a brilliant solution or a business idea no one else saw coming. Think pitch decks, side hustles, or a tech upgrade that transforms your workflow. Work smarter and weirder. The usual path isn't your path. 💖 Love & Friendship: Mind Meets Heart Romance is electric, but also deep. If you're single, a fascinating convo could spark real chemistry. In a relationship? It's a great time to explore each other's dreams, quirks, and oddly specific playlists. Connection today is all about celebrating what makes you different. Flirt cue: 'What's your weirdest dream and should we make it happen?' 🧘♀️ Mood & Vibe: Charged Up & Crystal Clear You're radiating that 'mad scientist meets philosopher' energy. Just remember to ground it. A walk, a journal entry, or a weird podcast could help you center your thoughts. You don't need to chase the lightning, you are the lightning. Lucky Color: Cobalt Blue Lucky Numbers: 7 & 29 Cosmic Playlist Song: 'Electric Feel' – MGMT Affirmation of the Day: 'I lead with vision, move with intention, and trust the power of my originality.' 💭 Aquarius Thought for June 26: You weren't made to fit into boxes. You were made to blow open new doors.
Irish Times
2 days ago
- General
- Irish Times
Neurodiversity and relationships: ‘It's about recognising where you both struggle and where you both thrive'
From the outside, some couples make relationships look easy. As though they were always meant to be together and simply 'get each other'. But relationships are often more complicated than they seem, and the younger generations are navigating an increasingly challenging relationship landscape. With more people being identified as neurodiverse, the dating scene becomes even more intricate. 'As humans, our need for connection is vital, not just for survival, but for companionship, love, and even growing a family,' says Afrah Al-yufrusi, psychosexual and relationship therapist with the Evidence-Based Therapy Centre in Galway. 'For those of us who experience neurodiversity, how we connect and relate to others may look different. We are influenced by early relationships, cultural experiences, personality traits, and how our brains are wired. These neurodivergent traits can affect how we navigate the world and, of course, how we form and maintain relationships.' READ MORE When we consider relationships at a base level, they come with a nuanced understanding that everyone is different. How people connect and develop relationships is often influenced by personalities and past experiences. Relationships are always complex. Couples navigating neurodiverse connections may find it more intricate as they seek to embrace the neurological differences within their relationship. 'Let's not sugar-coat this, relationships are challenging for everyone,' says Al-yufrusi. 'Ari Tuckman says: 'A good relationship pushes you to become a better person.' They take hard work, commitment, communication and reflection. The idea of 'happily ever after' in movies doesn't prepare us for the real, everyday challenges. When things don't match our expectations, frustration can build, disappointment sets in, and suddenly we're questioning our self-worth.' A neurodiverse relationship comes with potential challenges such as a difficulty in expressing emotions, experiencing different sensory sensitivities, and miscommunication. Awareness, understanding and appreciation of neurodiverse differences is important in a relationship that may also be affected by potential social stigma. 'In neurodivergent relationships, these challenges don't disappear, they're often just amplified,' says Al-yufrusi. She explains this by using the example of a partner with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) who might forget repeatedly to pay a bill, despite being capable and competent, leading to arguments and financial stress within the relationship. 'These small issues can create distance, as partners may start to turn away from each other rather than addressing the problem together,' she says. 'It can be especially difficult when consistency seems out of reach. Over time, this can lead to feelings of isolation and a widening emotional gap.' [ The key to a happy long-term relationship? Permission to let yourselves be boring Opens in new window ] Another example is a partner with autism who might look for more structure or predictability in their life and relationships. They may find it difficult to show empathy in the way their partner expects and express their love through different actions other than words or physical contact such as maintaining the house. Al-yufrusi says that when these small but significant differences aren't recognised, it can leave both partners feeling misunderstood. Not everyone expresses love in the same way and it's important to recognise that neurodivergent individuals may not express and receive love in ways that are considered to be more traditional, such as receiving gifts, words of affirmation, or acts of service. 'If you and your partner have different ways of expressing love, there can be disconnects, but it's all about understanding and bridging the gap. It's not about changing the person. It's about embracing the unique ways in which they express affection,' says Al-yufrusi. 'It's important to be flexible and mindful of how these languages play out in a relationship.' Recognising neurodivergence can be challenging, especially when a partner masks their neurodiverse traits. The signs and patterns will be there, however. Some of these include a partner who is easily distracted, forgets plans, or needs more time to process information or emotions. 'However, it's important to remember that neurodivergence is not an excuse for bad behaviour in a relationship,' Al-yufrusi asserts. 'Sometimes, it can be challenging to distinguish between neurodivergent traits and a situation where your partner may not be valuing you or the relationship. It's crucial to take a step back and assess the situation, whether it's a communication issue related to neurodivergence or a deeper relational issue that needs attention.' Understanding your own neurodivergent traits is the first step. When you know yourself, you're better equipped to communicate your needs and understand your partner's — Afrah Al-yufrusi It's important to identify that a person with ADHD may be challenged by attention regulation and may seem disengaged during conversations, non-committal or forgetful. Someone with autism may experience sensory overwhelm, prefer routines, or struggle with certain social cues. The signs are subtle, says Al-yufrusi, but are important to notice. 'If you're in a relationship and recognise these behaviours in yourself or your partner, it might be worth considering whether neurodivergence is playing a role,' she says. 'Sometimes, this realisation comes after a diagnosis in our children, or it may surface as we reflect on our own childhood experiences or recognise patterns in our relationship. It could also be sparked by something we've read or seen. For some, it can be particularly challenging when they reach perimenopause, and the strategies they've relied on no longer work, making it harder to mask their neurodivergent traits.' The best advice Al-yufrusi can give to readers navigating a neurodiverse relationship is to encourage a personal level of self-awareness. 'Understanding your own neurodivergent traits is the first step,' she says. 'When you know yourself, you're better equipped to communicate your needs and understand your partner's. It's about recognising where you both struggle and where you both thrive.' Within this self-awareness, Al-yufrusi suggests that self-regulation is also crucial as couples can learn to manage their emotions, especially in times of stress, by creating space for both partners to reconnect and communicate effectively. Miscommunication is another obstacle. As one partner is struggling with sensory overload, the other can feel ignored or dismissed. [ Adult diagnosis of ADHD: 'It was such a moment of clarity' Opens in new window ] 'When you understand the underlying cause, whether it's ADHD, autism, or any other neurodivergent trait, you can approach it with more empathy,' says Al-yufrusi. Communication, empathy, understanding and mutual respect encourage a relationship to thrive. 'Neurodivergent relationships can be both challenging and deeply rewarding,' says Al-yufrusi. 'The key to making them work lies in understanding yourself, your partner, and the neurodivergent traits that shape your interactions. With self-awareness, good communication, empathy and patience, neurodivergent relationships can thrive, offering growth, connection, and beautiful moments that are unique to each couple.'
UAE Moments
4 days ago
- Business
- UAE Moments
♍ Virgo: Daily Horoscope for June 24, 2025
Virgo, today is a day to embrace the beauty of connection and community. With the Sun-Jupiter conjunction in Cancer, you're encouraged to step out of your comfort zone and engage with those around you. Love Horoscope Today, Virgo, the stars encourage you to open your heart and embrace vulnerability. In love, it's okay to let go of your meticulous planning and allow spontaneity to guide you. Whether you're single or in a relationship, try to express your feelings more openly. Share a laugh, a secret, or even a silly dance with your partner or someone you admire. Remember, love is not always about perfection; it's about connection and shared moments. Let the warmth of the Sun-Jupiter conjunction in Cancer help you build deeper emotional bonds. Career Horoscope At work, Virgo, your analytical skills and attention to detail are your superpowers. However, today's cosmic energies suggest a shift towards collaboration and teamwork. The Sun-Jupiter conjunction in Cancer highlights the importance of building strong professional relationships. Be open to sharing ideas and listening to others' perspectives. You might find that a collaborative approach leads to innovative solutions. Remember, being flexible and adaptable can enhance your productivity and job satisfaction. Embrace the opportunity to learn from your colleagues. Health Horoscope Your well-being today hinges on balancing your meticulous nature with moments of relaxation. The Moon's transition into Cancer suggests a need for emotional nurturing. Take time to unwind and indulge in activities that soothe your soul, like reading a favorite book or enjoying a warm bath. Remember, Virgo, self-care is not a luxury but a necessity. Embrace the gentle energies of the day to recharge your spirit. A little laughter, perhaps from a funny movie or a chat with a friend, can also work wonders for your mental health. Finance Horoscope Financially, today is a day to trust your instincts, Virgo. The Sun-Jupiter conjunction in Cancer may bring opportunities for growth, but it's essential to remain grounded. Avoid making impulsive decisions; instead, rely on your logical and analytical skills to assess any financial propositions. Consider setting aside time to review your budget or plan for future investments. Remember, your meticulous nature is your ally in maintaining stability. Stay open to advice from trusted friends or family, as they may offer valuable insights. This article was previously published on bahrainmoments. To see the original article, click here
CBS News
5 days ago
- Entertainment
- CBS News
Pennsylvania strangers meet during viral photoshoot leading to real life connection
A Levittown photographer captured the moment two complete strangers met for the first time. Now, the images have gone viral as hundreds of thousands of people online are following the undeniable connection seen on camera. "I get two strangers together and we have fun, take a photo shoot, and apparently the internet really liked it," Amanda Johnson said. "They had no idea who they were and I got them together and their chemistry just kind of took off." Johnson has been a photographer since 2017 and she's done a handful of what she calls "stranger sessions." People sign up for the sessions and she tries to pair up strangers with similar interests before having them meet up for a photoshoot. Her most recent "stranger session" at the Red Rhino Car Wash in Fairless Hills garnered quite a bit of attention online after the photos showed Teresa Dittes and Dylan Waskiewicz's instant connection. Amanda Johnson "I turn around and we see each other and I was like, 'Oh, yeah. He's cute,'" Dittes said. "First time ever doing a stranger photoshoot," Waskiewicz said. "I've seen Amanda's previous one and I thought it was kind of cool. So, I gave it a shot." The photo session documented the first time they saw each other, from playful scenes at the car wash to more intimate moments, leading people online to find it hard to believe they had just met. "Everyone is just like, 'Oh my gosh, are they together? Are they together, are they together? Everyone wants to know," Johnson said. It's a real-life connection that sparked from the unknown and captivated the hearts of hundreds of thousands of people. "We went out on a date on Friday night," Dittes said. "We went out to dinner, and it went well because clearly, we're here. Online dating is awful. This was definitely a very interesting way to meet someone, but it was also a fun experience as well." Amanda Johnson "It was different and I'm all about different experiences, getting out there, putting yourself out there and just enjoying life really," Waskiewicz said. Johnson is currently working on setting up more "stranger sessions" in the near future. If you're interested, you can fill out an application here.
