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Are you cool? Take the test

Cool — you either have it or you don't. Alchemists and admen have long attempted, and failed, to pin down the ineffable qualities behind this magnetic nonchalance, but scientists have this week come the closest yet. A survey across 13 countries found that most respondents were in agreement that 'cool' people are 'bold, pleasure-seeking and self-directed' (Madonna and Kate Moss spring to mind) whereas 'good' people are 'agreeable, conscientious and calm'. Both cool and good people tend to be 'likeable and admirable' but cool types tend to be hedonistic too (see Charli XCX). Few people are both cool and good (step forward Dolly Parton, Barack Obama and Ryan Gosling). 'Cool' began as an accolade for jazz musicians who played with a certain aloofness, but is now so debased that it can also mean 'yes', 'no' and 'OK'. Yet in the digital age, its allure persists, seeping into modern life via social media memes and momentary hype. What the scientists didn't do was attempt to pin down the precise signifiers of cool — that is the job of a fashion editor and it has been my lifelong quest. Cool doesn't seem to change much, either. Last summer I asked my seven-year-old daughter and her friends what they thought a cool person looked like. They all basically described James Dean — 'sunglasses and a leather jacket' — despite the fact that none of them had ever heard of him, then said 'but a girl, obviously'. • The only four things to buy to look cool this summer It's fraught with unspoken rules too. When I asked the new head of French Vogue, Claire Thomson-Jonville (very cool), whether she'd been cool at school, she was horrified. 'There's no way to answer, because if you say you are, you're definitely not.' (It goes without saying that anybody who was cool at school is unlikely to remain so as a fully fledged adult, but also that many of the biggest nerds from school are now in charge of Silicon Valley, still aren't cool and still haven't got over it.) So, are you cool? Take our quiz and find out — in the name of science, of course. A: Oh, I don't really do 'labels' B: Yes C: No D: You'd have to ask them A: Whisky and Coke B: Aperol spritz C: A nice glass of red D: Do you have a natural wine? A: Clarks Wallabees B: Designer trainers C: Adidas Sambas D: Nike Rifts or Keens A: Sunglasses and a leather jacket B: Tight tailoring with pointy shoes C: Something smart that you are also comfortable in D: Define 'work' A: Whisky and Coke B: Oat cappuccino C: Tea or coffee with normal milk D: Matcha • Read more fashion advice and style inspiration from our experts A: Sunglasses and a leather jacket B: Jewellery and heels C: Posh trackies and khaki jacket D: Sweatshirt and joggers A: Black-and-white selfies from unexpected angles B: Fancy restaurants, holidays, very early gym classes C: I scroll but rarely post D: Not to do it A: Extensive vocal admiration B: Embarrassed silence C: A few compliments from people you trust D: Not much — but then they all do the same a week later A: A motorbike B: An SUV C: An ebike D: A fixie A: Free spirit B: Banter merchant C: Centrist mum or dad D: Vibes shaman A: Is my uniform B: Says 'good vibes only' C: Often has a little stain on it D: Is from the streetwear brand Aries A: Rebel without a Cause B: Forrest Gump C: Trainspotting D: The Matrix A: Roll-ups B: A strawberry ice Elfbar C: Only on holiday when drunk D: Psychedelic toad venom A: Brooding B: Cheeky C: France D: Brat A: Just you and the open road B: All 15 of your besties somewhere hot C: A house, a pool, no emails D: A silent breathwork retreat Mostly A I'm afraid you're trying way too hard. Lose the leather jacket and dial down the intensity a bit Mostly B You are not cool, sorry, but you also don't realise/care Mostly C You are cool-ish, which is to say just getting on with it without worrying what other people think Mostly D You are super-cool, congratulations — but are you any fun to hang out with?