Latest news with #malefriendship
Washington Post
24-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Washington Post
‘Among Friends' captures the joy and danger of intimacy
Men: think of your closest friend, the person who knows you best, with whom you feel the most comfortable. Your pal, your bud, your homie. What is the basis of your friendship? What would it take to rupture the years of trust and confidence between you? What would you be willing to forgive in order to maintain that relationship? Is there a circumstance in which you might choose your friend over a member of your own family? These are the questions at the heart of Hal Ebbott's stylish and assured debut novel. Arriving at a moment when there is a widely-discussed crisis in male friendship, 'Among Friends' is a timely book, placing such a relationship at the center of its narrative.
The Guardian
23-06-2025
- Entertainment
- The Guardian
‘One kid at a time': How children's books on male friendship could combat toxic masculinity
This year's Carnegie medals for children's writing, awarded on Thursday, brought to light an unexpected trend. At a time of widespread public anxiety about the decline in boys' reading habits and the rise of the toxic influencers of the online 'manosphere', male friendship and masculinity were front and centre on the shortlist. The winner, Margaret McDonald's superb debut, Glasgow Boys, tells the story of the relationship between two looked-after children on the threshold of adulthood who process trauma in different ways. Banjo's aggression and Finlay's avoidance could be seen as two models of dysfunctional masculinity. Luke Palmer's Play, also on the shortlist, tells a story of male friendship which touches on rape culture and county lines drug gangs, while teenage gang membership is the focus of Brian Conaghan's Treacle Town. Nathanael Lessore won the Shadower's Choice medal (voted for by young readers). King of Nothing tells the story of Anton, a pre-GCSE hardman for whom reputation is everything. Anton hangs out with a thuggish crowd whose worldview is shaped by gang culture and Tate-like influencers. The arc of the plot – boisterously comic at first, but increasingly moving – shows how Anton's developing friendship with the uncoolest boy in the school changes his priorities. Though the books were judged for their individual qualities, the panel's chair, Ros Harding, observes a pendulum-swing in publishing. 'We've gone from children's adventure books, where it was always the boy as the hero, then there was a backlash against that, making sure that girls could be the heroes as well, which then maybe led to some boys feeling that things weren't being written for them.' Now, she says, 'another wave of books' is addressing that. McDonald says that in Glasgow Boys, she 'wanted to explore the spectrum of masculinity that both Banjo and Finlay exist on. Finlay is the more 'feminine' man who we perceive to be empathetic and introverted – a very gentle person. Banjo, conversely, is the 'masculine' boy: violent and aggressive.' 'People have been very curious as to why I have focused on two men when I'm not myself a man. But I don't think it would have been much of a question if I was a male author.' McDonald had a considerable struggle to get Glasgow Boys published – 60 agents and 20 publishers, she says, turned it down. Does she think that one factor was a reluctance to publish books about boys? She believes the book's use of Scots dialect (it comes with a glossary) was an issue, as was the fact she was submitting it during Covid. But the decline in boys' reading, she suggests, might have created a vicious circle in publishing. 'I think because there's such a small readership it's difficult, in a business sense, to cut out the bigger readership – which is girls and women.' Harding says her experience as a librarian is that most boys read more narrowly than most girls. 'A girl who likes reading will read anything. It doesn't matter whether it's a male protagonist or a female. Boys were just a little bit more resistant to that. I think they are more likely to want the male protagonist.' When McDonald hears feedback on the book, male readers 'often focus on Banjo and Finlay separately, whereas my female readers focus on the relationships. A lot of boys who read it will be like, 'I related to Finlay', or 'I relate to Banjo', whereas none of the girls read that way. So it suggests a little bit of a difference in the ways in which boys go into books.' The hope is that they go into books at all. The explosion in so-called toxic masculinity is taking place at the same time as statistics tell us that reading for pleasure, especially among boys, is on the decline. Novels are empathy machines: they invite you to imagine what it might be like to be somebody else. So they are, at least potentially, an antidote to the misogynistic influence of the manosphere and gaming culture. But it's precisely with social media and video games that they are competing for the attention of boys and young men. Lessore says his book was inspired in part by discovering 'my little nephew and my cousin – who were, I think, nine and 13 at the time – were both watching Andrew Tate videos'. He sees the long-term effects of that in school visits he does, to expensive private schools and 'very, very underfunded state schools' alike. Children self-segregate: boys on one side, girls on the other. 'Gay' is being used as an insult once more, and boys have so little respect for female teachers that they have to call over male staff to settle them. Sign up to Bookmarks Discover new books and learn more about your favourite authors with our expert reviews, interviews and news stories. Literary delights delivered direct to you after newsletter promotion Does Lessore feel confident he's talking to the young men that books like his need to reach, though, rather than just about them? 'I start every school visit with the statistics that teenagers who read more tend to [get] higher paid jobs as adults,' he says. 'That usually gets them sitting up a little bit in their seats.' In Anton's world, drawn from Lessore's own working-class south London background, he thinks boys can find something to relate to. 'Kids like that don't think they can be writers, and therefore they don't read – and therefore they don't get the empathy that can be learned from books.' Lessore's influence seems to work. 'Even the more disruptive boys on the school visit tend to, you know, barge their way to the front of the queue to get their book signed. It's a drop. But, yeah, like: one kid at a time, one school at a time.'
The Guardian
19-06-2025
- Entertainment
- The Guardian
Carnegie medal for writing: Margaret McDonald named youngest ever winner
Two books about male friendship and masculinity have been announced as winners in the latest Carnegie awards, which highlight the best new books for children and young people. This year saw 27-year-old Margaret McDonald become the youngest ever winner of the Carnegie medal for writing, which is judged by a panel of librarians. McDonald's winning debut, Glasgow Boys, is a coming-of-age novel about the friendship between two boys who have grown up in the care system. Another book focused on male friendship, King of Nothing by Nathanael Lessore, was voted winner in a separate prize judged by young people from reading groups in schools and libraries who shadowed the judging process for the flagship award. The Carnegie medal for illustration was awarded to Olivia Lomenech Gill for Clever Crow, written by Chris Butterworth. The shadowers' choice medal for illustration went to Homebody by Theo Parish. The winners were announced at a ceremony at the Cambridge theatre in London on Thursday. McDonald and Lomenech Gill were awarded £5,000 each, while Lessore and Parish were given £500 each to donate to libraries of their choice. Writing Glasgow Boys, McDonald worked with a children's therapist to depict the care system in an authentic way. The novel, which incorporates Scots dialect, is 'an immersive and visceral read that completely draws the reader into the present and past lives of Finlay and Banjo', said judging chair Ros Harding. 'Neither of [the characters] can remember the last time they had a hug; both are determined to hold on at all costs to the uncertain hope of a brighter future', wrote Imogen Russell Williams in a Guardian review. The book 'is a paean to the power of friendship, and daring to be vulnerable in the face of past hurt'. McDonald is donating her prize money to Action for Children, which helps young people in care and other vulnerable groups of children, while Lomenech Gill plans to use the money for a project supporting schools, education and libraries in Palestine. Sign up to Bookmarks Discover new books and learn more about your favourite authors with our expert reviews, interviews and news stories. Literary delights delivered direct to you after newsletter promotion Working on Clever Crow 'was a great opportunity to learn more about these very clever and sociable birds, and I hope that the book might encourage readers to look at crows from a different viewpoint than the rather negative stereotype as portrayed in fairy tales, horror movies, and Hitchcock,' said Lomenech Gill. The shadowers' choice winner for writing, King of Nothing, is a teen comedy about an unlikely friendship between two boys. Earlier this year, the novel topped the older readers category in the Waterstones children's book prize and won the Jhalak children's and young adult prize. 'It's testament to Lessore's lightness of touch and believable characters that despite delving into big topics such as toxic masculinity and grief, this is an immensely readable book that never feels too worthy,' wrote Fiona Noble in the Guardian. Homebody, the shadowers' choice winner for illustration, follows 'the protagonist's search for self-acceptance, so that the house of their body can feel like a true home', wrote Imogen Russell Williams in the Guardian. 'Investigating the subtleties of trans and non-binary identities, its soft greys and pinks and joyful emphasis on self-discovery will appeal to Heartstopper fans.' The Carnegie writing medal was established in 1936, while the illustration prize was launched in 1955. Previous winners of the writing award include Frank Cottrell Boyce, CS Lewis, Philip Pullman and Ruta Sepetys; past illustration winners include Shirley Hughes, Quentin Blake and Lauren Child. Last year, Joseph Coelho won the writing award for The Boy Lost in the Maze, illustrated by Kate Milner, while Aaron Becker took home the illustration medal for The Tree and the River.
CBC
06-06-2025
- Entertainment
- CBC
Friendship subverts traditional depictions of male companionship on screen
Comedians Tim Robinson and Paul Rudd star in a new dark comedy, Friendship. It's a film that delves into a subject you don't see represented often: friendship between men. Today on Commotion, host Elamin Abdelmahmoud sits down with film critics Adrian Horton and Jackson Weaver to discuss their thoughts on Friendship and how the film subverts traditional depictions of male companionship on screen.
Fast Company
29-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Fast Company
A TikTok trend has men calling to wish their friends good night. What does that say about male loneliness?
A new trend that's been circulating on social media has grown men reaching out to their buddies to say 'good night,' and sometimes even 'sweet dreams.' The trend has taken off on TikTok and Instagram in recent weeks, in part because the reactions from the men receiving the calls has often been humorous. In one video, a man calls his friend, tells him good night, and immediately gets a shocked response: 'What?' The caller replies, 'I'm just calling to tell you good night. Sweet dreams.' But that's not quite enough clarity for the man on the other end. 'Good night? A grown man telling another grown man good night?' he presses, while the caller muffles a laugh. The TikTok prank operates on exactly that premise—that grown men calling each other to say good night is funny because it's so utterly unexpected. Because truthfully, most grown men are not calling each other to check in before bed. Some men receiving the calls commented that nobody has called them to say good night in many years. That's as nightly check-ins—perhaps check-ins of any kind—can feel contrary to ingrained masculinity norms. But that's problematic. Male loneliness has been viewed as a growing issue, and has even been called an epidemic by some experts in recent years. One 2024 review of masculinity norms and how they impact male loneliness highlighted an 'urgent need' for a shift in order to 'support men's social connectedness.' Not only do men feel less connected, but they also are less likely to seek mental health care than women. According to some research, only an estimated one in 10 men suffering with depression or anxiety disorders receive treatment. A 'foreign' feeling Experts say that men don't always feel able to reach out, and when they don't, it can lead to isolation. Dr. Rachel Austin, a Maryland-based clinical psychologist, tells Fast Company she saw the trend circulating and was struck—but not surprised—by how 'foreign' it feels to so many men to do something that's 'more connected to emotion' than they may be used to. According to Austin, it can be especially hard for men to learn how to 'facilitate connection' when they fear doing so may be perceived as 'weak' or not masculine, and especially when doing so hasn't been modeled for them. That can make even recognizing the feeling a challenge. 'Many male patients that are lonely aren't articulating (even to their partners) what they need,' says Austin. Judging by the videos, while confused at first, the men actually appreciated the seemingly bizarre phone calls. Many ended up feeling touched, or said things like, 'I miss you,' or even, 'love you,' in response. Some of the men even began reminiscing about their younger days, perhaps back in high school or college, when touching base to check in and say good night was not a weird occurrence, but part of their routine. In one video posted on Instagram, which has over 757,000 likes at present, a dad calls his longtime buddy to say good night. The friend on the other end of the line instantly bursts out laughing, and brings up their high school days when nightly calls were expected from those in their friend group. 'I can't believe you remembered that,' the friend says. 'That was like a staple.' While the trend is wholesome, and certainly worth clicking through a few videos for a chuckle, the responses seem to reveal a deeper issue—that men reaching out to each other is sorely needed. It may even spark some sorely needed discussion about why exactly this feels so unexpected.
