Latest news with #relationshipSatisfaction
Daily Mail
17-06-2025
- General
- Daily Mail
Love really is a rollercoaster! Incredible chart reveals how much relationship satisfaction changes in a single DAY
When it comes to relationships, there can be plenty of ups and downs. Now, a new study proves that love really is a rollercoaster. Scientists have mapped fluctuations in relationship satisfaction to reveal how it can vary considerably over several days – and even over the course of 24 hours. 'Fluctuations are quite normal,' lead author Louisa Scheling, from Johannes Gutenberg University Mainz said. 'However, they may also indicate unsatisfied needs in the relationship.' Figures show that in the UK, 42 per cent of marriages now end in divorce, marking a significant increase since the 1950s. Research into the phenomenon has focused primarily on relationship satisfaction across months and years. 'In contrast, we have decided to take a narrow chronological approach to determine how satisfied partners were with their situation over the course of a few days and even within a 24-hour period,' Ms Scheling said. The researchers analysed data provided by nearly 750 couples who reported their relationship satisfaction on a daily basis, up to several times a day. They found that partners experience substantial fluctuations in terms of how satisfied they are with the relationship. These fluctuations tended to be greater over periods of several days than during a single 24-hour period. They also discovered the 'up and down' swing of satisfaction turned out to be relatively synchronised for both partners. Further analysis revealed that the perceived responsiveness of the partner was a key factor in determining the course of satisfaction. The emotional stability of male partners also had a notable effect, they found. 'The reliable perception and fulfillment of the partner's needs contributes significantly to stable relationship satisfaction in everyday life,' Ms Scheling explained. 'It's similar to a parent-child relationship: if needs are consistently met, satisfaction stabilizes at a high level.' Two couples with average (top) versus strong (bottom) fluctuations in relationship satisfaction, measured five times a day over 10 days The fluctuations in relationship satisfaction can – over the short term – be accompanied by thoughts of breaking up, she said. Over the long term, however, it appeared to have a limited effect on the course of the relationship. 'It is possible that fluctuations in relationship satisfaction tend on the whole to mimic the current relationship dynamics between partners, rather than predicting the future development of the relationship,' she added. In her view, the findings of the study can help to support couples and show them, for example, in the context of relationship counselling, that fluctuations in relationship satisfaction are normal but may serve as signals that there is room for improvement. The findings were published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. WHAT ARE THE FIVE STAGES OF A RELATIONSHIP AND HOW DO THEY AFFECT THE BODY? Psychologists suggest there are five stages of love - butterflies, building, assimilation, honesty and stability. Each of these stages has a different impact on our psyche and health, researchers at eHarmony found in a 2014 survey. 1) Butterflies Marked by intense infatuation and sexual attraction, symptoms noted by couples included weight loss (30 per cent) and a lack of productivity (39 per cent). Biologically, it's reported that during this early stage of dating, both men and women create more of the sex hormones testosterone and oestrogen. As a result more than half - 56 per cent - noted an increase in their libido. 2) Building As the initial attraction gives way to learning more about one another, the honeymoon stage subsides and a couple begin to build their relationship. eHarmony's study estimated around three per cent of Britons in relationship are currently at stage two. The body releases neurochemicals called monoamines, which speed up heart rate, trigger rushes of intense pleasure and replicate the effects of Class A drugs. The biological effect culminates in a feeling of 'happy anxiety', where people can think of little else than their blossoming relationship. Forty-four per cent of the study participants noted a lack of sleep while 29 per cent reported a their attention span had been adversely affected. 3) Assimilation Having established whether the other person is 'right', stage three forces a couple to question whether the 'relationship' itself is right. Questions over the future of the union and forming boundaries in the relationship can lead to a rise in stress levels, reported by 27 per cent of those taking part in the study. 4) Honesty Stage three combines with stage four, where people open up showing the 'real you' sees the first real rise in stress levels and anxiety. 'This stage deals with the concept behind how we all put on our best faces, through social media we edit our lives as well as our pictures to make it appear as though everything is fine,' psychologist Dr Linda Papadopoulos, who assisted with the study, told MailOnline. Opening up completely triggered feelings of doubt and increased vulnerability in 15 per cent of participants. 5) Stability If a couple can weather the emotional rollercoaster of the first four stages, the fifth and final stage, stability, brings with it increased levels of trust and intimacy. eHarmony found 50 per cent of respondents had reached this stage, and 23 per cent reported feeling happier as a result. Biologically, vasopressin - a powerful hormone released by men and women during orgasm - strengthens feelings of attachment. Meanwhile oxytocin - released during childbirth - deepens feelings of attachment. 'This is where we see a real level of contentness,' Dr Papadopolous told MailOnline. 'We found the body releases wonderful hormones which helps couples bond. We noted a real sense of attachment, and a sense of "you have got my back and I've got yours".'
Forbes
11-06-2025
- Health
- Forbes
3 Subtle Signs Your Relationship Is Near Its End — By A Psychologist
A 2025 preregistered study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology analyzed data from over 10,000 participants across four national longitudinal studies. It found a clear pattern: relationship satisfaction doesn't just drop suddenly at the end. Rather, it goes through a phase of 'terminal decline.' This decline begins years before the actual breakup, with a slow preterminal dip, followed by a sharper crash months before separation. The study also discovered that relationship satisfaction declines more sharply than general life satisfaction. This pattern was more severe for partners who didn't initiate the breakup. Although the research suggests a clear trajectory, most people don't see the signs that they're on it until it's too late. They say things like, 'I'm just overthinking it,' or 'Maybe I'm just tired.' If you've been wondering whether you're still choosing your relationship or just maintaining it out of habit, here are three signs you may already be in the pre-breakup phase. Fantasies of freedom often show up before a breakup — not because you want to hurt them, but because you want to feel like yourself again. You no longer imagine a future together, but instead find yourself daydreaming about a life you live on your own terms. You wonder how it would feel to wake up without the relationship weighing you down or managing the emotional strain that doesn't seem to cease. After a while, when the exhaustion sets in, you rarely notice how your body feels. You stop fighting because you no longer have the energy to keep trying. You don't initiate conversations, try to repair what's broken or mend the bond that seems to be crumbling. A 2024 study published in Behavioral Sciences analyzed responses from 401 married couples and found that those with lower self-compassion, relationship self-efficacy and happiness reported significantly higher levels of couple burnout. Rapidly dwindling happiness emerged as the strongest predictor of burnout — even more than their income, how long they were married for or even the number of children they had together. This indicator matters because burnout doesn't always show up as conflict. Often, it stems from a steady decline in emotional resources. When you are no longer happy in a relationship, you don't feel enough self-compassion; as a result, the relationship begins to feel too heavy to shoulder. It's not because your love is gone, but because your capacity to carry it is. When you're constantly making excuses, compensating or dwelling on all the times you could have said things but didn't, your body begins to grieve before your mind catches up. It means the emotional labor has started to outweigh the connection you're trying so hard to maintain. Because at this point, you don't even want to try and fix the broken parts. The only thing you care about is waking up feeling rested enough to go about your day. A 2023 study published in Family Relations found that, for dual-earner couples, emotional exhaustion didn't just stem from external stressors. It was often associated with how unevenly emotional labor was distributed within the relationship. When one partner, usually the woman, consistently took on more coping and regulation, they reported significantly higher fatigue. The reverse wasn't true because men's strategies didn't buffer their partners in the same way. This imbalance tends to grow gradually. Specifically, in the moments where you swallow what you want to say because peace matters to you more than being right does. You try to patch up the tension while putting on a calm face, while on the inside you feel anything but. This emotional fatigue can also manifest as a physiological signature. A 2018 study published in Psychoneuroendocrinology tracked couples' real-time stress and fatigue levels across five days. It found that after emotionally strained interactions, especially ones rated as negative, both partners reported feeling more tired — even when no arguments made it to the surface. Fatigue, it turns out, doesn't need a crisis to knock on the door. It shows up through repetition, and the body keeping score of every unresolved feeling you never had the chance to voice. If you're tired of pretending everything is fine, especially when your body already knows it isn't, it could be a sign that the relationship may be coming to an end. In the pre-breakup phase, you might find yourself ruminating on why you chose to stay with them in the first place. You start stacking good moments against the growing bad ones, and the future plans against their past mistakes. You start feeling like you're the only one in the relationship who keeps trying, feeling a little lonelier each day. There might not even be a glaring reason to leave; there simply aren't enough good reasons to stay. And that absence will start to weigh on you. Some days you may feel anchored, while, on others, you're bombarded with a feeling that something fundamental isn't working between you and your partner. And the tug-of-war in your head doesn't stop. A 2024 study published in Emotion found that people who felt conflicted about their partner often experienced mental whiplash, where they went from wanting closeness to pulling away, from imagining a future together to feeling frustrated or numb. For the participants in the study, this ambivalence gave rise to far more than just confusion. It shaped their daily behaviors in subtle but significant ways, from overthinking to emotional withdrawal. So, if the question keeps returning to you, 'Should I just leave?' it's no longer a question. It's likely an answer you might be trying to ignore. Sometimes, one of the clearest signs that a relationship is ending isn't what's happening between you. Rather, it's what's no longer happening within you. And that's the part individuals often notice last. Take this 2-minute test to find out how satisfied you really are in your relationship: Relationship Satisfaction Scale
