Israel's provocative settlement response may force Canada to back up its words
"It's basically telling the world that we don't really care about what you think at this point in time," he told CBC News. "They really are thumbing their noses at the international community."
Settlement expansion has accelerated ever since the arrival of the current government, Netanyahu's sixth, at the end of 2022. But Allen says the announcement of 22 new settlements — both through new construction and the formalization of existing settler outposts built outside the law — is a major escalation in a number of ways.
"First of all, it's big in terms of the numbers. Secondly, it is legalizing what were deemed illegal settlements even in Israel by its Supreme Court," he said.
"But more importantly, you're getting statements out of ministers which are basically saying the purpose of this is to prevent a two-state solution, while at the same time you've got activity in Gaza, which looks like Israel may be trying to occupy large parts of the Gaza Strip as well."
The dramatic action, he said, is driven by a sense within the Israeli right that this is a now-or-never moment.
"These ministers realize that their polling numbers are very bad and this is their last chance to try and significantly change things on the ground in Israel," he said.
"And so they're really trying a last-ditch effort to kill the two-state solution."
From jail cell to cabinet table
While Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has given his full endorsement to the settlement plan, many Israelis believe that the strongest impetus for it comes from the country's finance minister, Bezalel Smotrich, who also holds key posts giving him control over the West Bank.
Smotrich's role illustrates just how much mainstream politics in Israel has changed in the past two decades.
In 2005, Smotrich was one of four radical settlers arrested by Israel's Shin Bet security service on suspicion of plotting violent attacks to prevent the evacuation of Israeli settlements in Gaza and the northern West Bank. He appeared in security court in handcuffs and a prison jumpsuit.
Today, he is the number-two figure in the government and in a position to order the official re-establishment of settlements whose evacuation he once so radically opposed.
Smotrich on May 19 boasted that "we are disassembling Gaza, and leaving it as piles of rubble with total destruction [that has] no precedent globally. And the world isn't stopping us."
He said his own preference would be to cut off water as well as food, but that might lead other countries to intervene. He openly stated that the goal was to leave no Palestinians in Gaza.
On May 25, he returned to the same theme.
"We are being blessed with the opportunity, thank God, of seeing an expansion of the borders of the land of Israel, on all fronts," he said. "We are being blessed with the opportunity to blot out the seed of Amalek, a process which is intensifying."
'Loss of credibility' if Canada fails to act
"We oppose any attempt to expand settlements in the West Bank," wrote Prime Minister Mark Carney, Britain's Keir Starmer and France's Emmanuel Macron in their joint statement last week.
"Israel must halt settlements, which are illegal, and undermine the viability of a Palestinian state and the security of both Israelis and Palestinians. We will not hesitate to take further action, including targeted sanctions."
Thomas Juneau, a former Canadian defence official who now teaches about the Middle East at the University of Ottawa's graduate school of public and international affairs, told CBC News that Israel's announcement leaves Canada with little choice but to back up its words.
WATCH | WHO warns of famine in Gaza:
Gaza's population faces starvation and famine, WHO warns
17 days ago
Duration 2:01
The risk of famine and mass starvation is rising in Gaza, the World Health Organization warns. Palestinian health officials say dozens of children have died of malnutrition since March, the month Israel blocked all aid shipments.
"It does put pressure on the Canadian government, but also on the French, British, German and other European governments in the sense that there was a clear position that was taken last week of threatening actions against Israel," Juneau said.
"So if Canada and European players now do not do anything about 22 new settlements in the West Bank, there is a loss of credibility that would follow."
Former ambassador Allen said Canada can't lay down a marker like the joint statement it signed onto last week, and then let such a provocative response pass without taking action.
"I frankly don't think they will ignore this. I think those three governments were serious about what they were saying, and I expect sanctions to follow," he told CBC News.
Sanctions should target ministers: Former ambassador
Canada has already sanctioned a handful of extremist settlers, albeit reluctantly and only following actions taken by European allies.
But those sanctions have had little practical effect. The sanctioned individuals have suffered few real inconveniences, treating the sanctions in some cases as a badge of honour.
Although condemned many times by Western governments, the most extreme ministers in Netanyahu's cabinet have thus far avoided sanctions. Britain's David Cameron told the BBC he had been preparing sanctions for Smotrich and Itamar Ben Gvir prior to his government's election defeat. Ben Gvir is a rabble-rousing extremist who was also once a target for Shin Bet surveillance, but is now Israel's minister of national security.
Allen says there would be little point in simply repeating ineffectual sanctions on individual settlers, when the settlement policy is clearly being driven from the top.
"I thought that [the joint statement] was the strongest, most comprehensive announcement that I've ever seen out of the Canadian government. But if they were not to follow up, having issued a specific threat vis-a-vis settlements, then I think it would be a paper statement."
Allen identified Smotrich, Ben Gvir and Defence Minister Israel Katz as the three cabinet members driving the most radical policies.
"If I were advising them, I would advise them to sanction the ministers in question, all three of them," he told CBC News. "But we have to recognize that Prime Minister Netanyahu is the prime minister and he is allowing all of this to happen," he said.
Netanyahu counting on Trump
Juneau says that Netanyahu, at times like these, tends to rely on Israel's relationship with Washington. The Trump administration is the only government in the world that does not always regard Israel's West Bank settlements as inherently illegal under the Fourth Geneva Convention, which forbids a victorious party in war from transferring its own population into conquered territory, or forcing the civilian population that lives there to leave.
"As much as there is a growing trend of European powers and Canada being irritated with Israel, that only matters at most in a secondary way in the calculus of the current Israeli government," Juneau said.
U.S. President Donald Trump, who suggested expelling Gaza's population to turn the territory into a kind of international tourist riviera, is unlikely to react strongly to the settlement announcement, said Juneau. "But there are a lot of indications that the Trump administration is growing somewhat irritated with Israel."
Signs include the fact that both Trump and Vice-President JD Vance have visited the Middle East without stopping in Israel, that Trump has clearly ignored Israeli wishes and objections in negotiations with both Iran and the Houthis of Yemen and persistent rumours that Trump is secretly negotiating some kind of grand bargain with Saudi Arabia without Israeli input.
"All of that put together is causing anxiety in Israel," said Juneau.
Canada will likely co-ordinate with allies
Canada will likely want to co-ordinate its response with the British and French governments that co-signed last week's joint statement, say the two experts.
"Where Canada can have a limited but real impact is when it acts with its allies, especially in Europe, but others, too: Australia, Japan, South Korea and a few others," said Juneau.
"If there is a co-ordinated campaign, not only of sticks towards Israel, but also support to the Palestinian Authority and to the peace camp in Israel, then there can be an impact."
This week, European countries that didn't sign the joint statement separately warned Israel that their patience was at an end.
Italy's foreign minister said Israel's war in Gaza had taken on "absolutely dramatic and unacceptable forms" and "must stop immediately." Germany's conservative chancellor Friedrich Merz, long an unconditional supporter of Israel, said that "what the Israeli army is doing in the Gaza Strip, I no longer understand the goal, to harm the civilian population in such a way."
For the first time, Germany threatened "consequences" if Israel did not change direction, and Foreign Minister Johann Wadephul said Germany's days of "obligatory solidarity" with Israel were over.
Juneau says that Canada has no choice but to demand respect for the two-state formula, and for international law.
"If peace remains the objective, if security remains the objective, then there is no other alternative than coexistence between the Palestinian side and the Israeli side," he said.
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Canada News.Net
35 minutes ago
- Canada News.Net
Truth, first casualty of war: no more so than in Gaza
We are living in truly extraordinary times. We recently witnessed the United Nations special rapporteur on the situation of human rights in the Palestinian territories, Francesca Albanese, being sanctioned by the United States for doing her job – that is, documenting Israel's abuses against Palestinians during its ongoing military assault on Gaza. Of course, silencing and censorship have been the modus operandi of the pro-Israel camp since October 2023. In the immediate aftermath of the Hamas attack on Israel, they came for all those who insisted that the history of Palestine and Israel did not begin on October 7, 2023, and for pointing to the longer history of occupation, settler colonialism, or the siege of Gaza since 2007 – they were silenced, censored, and punished. Those were the days of the now‑discredited reports of "beheaded babies". Across the US and Europe, some faced death threats and social media attacks, while others were reprimanded by employers and line managers for criticising Israeli policies or publicly expressing pro-Palestinian views. In schools across Maryland, Minnesota, Florida and Arizona, teachers were suspended and student clubs shut down for pro-Palestine activism. University professors in the US and the United Kingdom were reported to the police for "liking" or sharing pro-Palestinian social media posts. In May 2024, Maura Finkelstein became the first tenured academic to be dismissed for anti-Zionist speech. She was fired from Muhlenberg College after posting a Palestinian poet's work. Between October 2023 and now, there have been scores of such cases around the world. Only a few days ago, four adjunct professors at the City University of New York were dismissed for their Palestine solidarity activism. While the foreign press has been banned from entering Gaza, Palestinian journalists there have been treated as legitimate military targets by Israel. On average, 13 journalists have been killed per month – a toll higher than that of "both World Wars, the Vietnam War, the wars in Yugoslavia and the United States war in Afghanistan combined". It is the deadliest conflict for media workers ever recorded. Elsewhere, journalistic voices – especially those of Middle Eastern or North African descent – have been systematically silenced for supporting the Palestinian cause or criticising the Israeli government. This includes Australian radio host Antoinette Lattouf, who was dismissed in December 2023 after posting a Human Rights Watch report alleging that "Israel was using starvation as a weapon of war in Gaza". Palestinian-Canadian journalists Yara Jamal (CTV) and Zahraa al-Akhrass (Global News, during maternity leave) were both sacked in October 2023, following pressure from Honest Reporting Canada. Briahna Joy Gray and Katie Halper were also fired from Hill News for statements critical of Israel. Gray announced on X: "The Hill has fired me … there should be no doubt that … suppressing speech – particularly when it's critical of the state of Israel." Beyond dismissals, Western media executives have shaped the narrative, repeating Israeli propaganda, mischaracterising Palestinian activism as pro-Hamas or anti-Semitic, portraying Israelis as victims far more often than Palestinians, and whitewashing Israeli war crimes in Gaza. The BBC, in particular, has faced repeated criticism for its pro-Israel bias. From the language used in headlines to the disproportionate airtime given to Israeli officials, its reporting has consistently been accused of downplaying Palestinian suffering and mirroring Israeli government talking points. Staff resignations, open letters, and public protests have all challenged the broadcaster's editorial stance on Gaza. At Upday, Europe's largest news aggregator owned by Axel Springer, employees were instructed to "colour the company's coverage of the war in Gaza with pro‑Israel sentiment". Internal documents obtained by The Intercept revealed staff were told not to "push anything involving Palestinian casualty tolls" unless "information about Israel" was given "higher up in the story". After October 7, students at Harvard were subjected to terrifying doxxing campaigns labelling them anti-Semitic or terrorist sympathisers, their photos and personal data shared publicly. As Israel's scholasticide continued in Gaza, the silencing spread on campuses across the US and Europe. Palestine solidarity encampments saw students demanding their institutions cut ties with Israeli universities and the military‑industrial complex. They faced brutal police crackdowns, suspensions, and some were denied graduation. Universities swiftly imposed new restrictions on gatherings and protests to curb student Palestine solidarity. Now, under a Trump administration, such suppression is public policy, extending to threats of arrest, denaturalisation and deportation for pro‑Palestinian voices, including lawmakers like NYC mayoral hopeful Zohran Mamdani. Trump falsely labelled him "illegal", branded him a "communist", and threatened arrest if he obstructed Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) "operations" – echoing GOP Representative Andy Ogles's call for denaturalisation and deportation, citing alleged misrepresentations in Mamdani's naturalisation without any evidence. White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt confirmed that the Justice Department had received related requests. We have also seen Palestinian flags banned at sporting and music events. Individuals have been refused entry into public venues and businesses for wearing a keffiyeh. The International Criminal Court (ICC) chief prosecutor, Karim Khan, was warned that he and the ICC would be "destroyed" if they did not drop the case against Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and former Defence Minister Yoav Gallant. Four ICC judges were sanctioned by the US government. Academy Award‑winner Susan Sarandon was dropped by her talent agency, UTA, for remarks at a Palestine solidarity rally. Melissa Barrera was dismissed from the cast of Scream VII for social media posts describing Israeli actions as genocide and ethnic cleansing. Spyglass Media Group stated it has "zero tolerance for antisemitism … including false references to genocide, ethnic cleansing, Holocaust distortion". Recently, performers like Bob Vylan and Irish group Kneecap used their platforms at music festivals to show solidarity with Palestine. The group now faces terror charges. Vylan's shows in Europe were cancelled, and his US visa revoked, putting an upcoming tour of the country in doubt. The pro-Israel camp also launched a campaign against the Glastonbury Festival after both artists performed there in June. They targeted the BBC for airing the performances live and pressured organisers to distance themselves from the musicians. The backlash made clear that even major cultural institutions are not safe from censorship efforts. Adding to this troubling trend, widely respected Israeli‑American historian and genocide scholar Omer Bartov has become a focal point of a fierce backlash. In an op‑ed for The New York Times, titled "I'm a Genocide Scholar. I Know It When I See It", Bartov declared that Israel is committing genocide in Gaza, pointing to the systematic infrastructure destruction, forced population shifts and rhetoric by Israeli leaders, arguing it matches both UN and legal definitions of genocide. Since then, he has been slammed by pro‑Israel factions, accused of misapplying the term, and urged to be "cancelled", a campaign he rebuts by highlighting that many genocide studies experts share his conclusion. The reputational assault currently faced by Bartov demonstrates how even the world's leading genocide experts are now being targeted for naming Israel's actions in Gaza as genocide. This may already appear to be an extensive campaign of suppression. But consider: what does it say about Israel's position if it relies so heavily on censorship? Nonetheless, it remains insufficient. For Israel's sake, every student, academic, activist, musician, artist or lawmaker who criticises its policies must now be branded a terror supporter. Every civil society organisation, human rights group or international body documenting Israeli abuses must be labelled anti-Semitic. Only then can we claim we saw nothing. Only then can we say we heard nothing. And only then can we justify why we did nothing when the genocide was ongoing in Gaza.


CTV News
5 hours ago
- CTV News
U.S. envoy doubles down on support for Syria's government and criticizes Israel's intervention
U.S. Ambassador to Turkey and Special Envoy to Syria Tom Barrack speaks during an interview with The Associated Press at the U.S. Embassy in Aukar, northern suburb of Beirut, Lebanon, Monday, July 21, 2025. (AP Photo/Hassan Ammar) BEIRUT — A U.S. envoy doubled down on Washington's support for the new government in Syria, saying Monday there is 'no Plan B' to working with the current authorities to unite the country still reeling from a nearly 14-year civil war and now wracked by a new outbreak of sectarian violence. Tom Barrack took a critical tone toward Israel's recent intervention in Syria, calling it poorly timed and saying that it complicated efforts to stabilize the region. Barrack, who is ambassador to Turkiye and special envoy to Syria and also has a short-term mandate in Lebanon, made the comments in an exclusive interview with The Associated Press during a visit to Beirut. He spoke following more than a week of clashes in the southern province of Sweida between militias of the Druze religious minority and local Sunni Muslim Bedouin tribes. Syrian government forces intervened, ostensibly to restore order, but ended up siding with the Bedouins before withdrawing under a ceasefire agreement with Druze factions. Hundreds have been killed in the fighting, and some government fighters allegedly shot dead Druze civilians and burned and looted their houses. In the meantime, Israel intervened last week on behalf of the Druze, who are seen as a loyal minority within Israel and often serve in its military. Israel launched dozens of strikes on convoys of government forces in Sweida and also struck the Syrian Ministry of Defense headquarters in central Damascus. Over the weekend, Barrack announced a ceasefire between Syria and Israel, without giving details. Syrian government forces have redeployed in Sweida to halt renewed clashes between the Druze and Bedouins, and civilians from both sides were set to be evacuated Monday. U.S. envoy says Israeli intervention 'came at a very bad time' Barrack told the AP that 'the killing, the revenge, the massacres on both sides' are 'intolerable,' but that 'the current government of Syria, in my opinion, has conducted themselves as best they can as a nascent government with very few resources to address the multiplicity of issues that arise in trying to bring a diverse society together.' At a later press conference he said the Syrian authorities 'need to be held accountable' for violations. Regarding Israel's strikes on Syria, Barrack said: 'The United States was not asked, nor did they participate in that decision, nor was it the United States responsibility in matters that Israel feels is for its own self-defence.' However, he said that Israel's intervention 'creates another very confusing chapter' and 'came at a very bad time.' Prior to the conflict in Sweida, Israel and Syria had been engaging in talks over security matters, while the Trump administration had been pushing them to move toward a full normalization of diplomatic relations. When the latest fighting erupted, 'Israel's view was that south of Damascus was this questionable zone, so that whatever happened militarily in that zone needed to be agreed upon and discussed with them,' Barrack said. 'The new government (in Syria) coming in was not exactly of that belief.' The ceasefire announced Saturday between Syria and Israel is a limited agreement addressing only the conflict in Sweida, he said. It does not address the broader issues between the two countries, including Israel's contention that the area south of Damascus should be a demilitarized zone. In the discussions leading up to the ceasefire, Barrack said 'both sides did the best they can' to came to an agreement on specific questions related to the movement of Syrian forces and equipment from Damascus to Sweida. 'Whether you accept that Israel can intervene in a sovereign state is a different question,' he said. He suggested that Israel would prefer to see Syria fragmented and divided rather than a strong central state in control of the country. 'Strong nation states are a threat — especially Arab states are viewed as a threat to Israel,' he said. But in Syria, he said, 'I think all of the the minority communities are smart enough to say, we're better off together, centralized.' A Damascus deal with Kurdish forces still in play The violence in Sweida has deepened the distrust of minority religious and ethnic groups in Syria toward the new government in Damascus, led by Sunni Muslim former insurgents who unseated Syria's longtime autocratic ruler, Bashar Assad, in a lightning offensive in December. The attacks on Druze civilians followed the deaths of hundreds of civilians from the Alawite minority, to which Assad belongs, earlier this year in sectarian revenge attacks on the Syrian coast. While interim President Ahmad al-Sharaa has promised to protect minorities and punish those who target civilians, many feel his government has not done enough. At the same time, Damascus has been negotiating with the Kurdish forces that control much of northeast Syria to implement an agreement that would merge the U.S.-backed, Kurdish-led Syrian Democratic Forces with the new national army. Barrack, who spoke to SDF leader Mazloum Abdi over the weekend, said he does not believe the violence in Sweida will derail those talks and that there could be a breakthrough 'in the coming weeks.' Neighbouring Turkiye, which wants to curtail the influence of Kurdish groups along its border and has tense relations with Israel, has offered to provide defence assistance to Syria. Barrack said the U.S. has 'no position' on the prospect of a defence pact between Syria and Turkiye. 'It's not in the U.S.'s business or interest to tell any of the surrounding nations with each other what to do,' he said. Hezbollah disarmament remains a thorny issue Barrack's visit to Lebanon came amid ongoing domestic and international pressure for the Lebanese militant group Hezbollah to give up its remaining arsenal after a bruising war with Israel that ended with a U.S.-brokered ceasefire agreement in November. Speaking at a press conference in Beirut Monday, Barrack said the ceasefire agreement 'didn't work.' Israel has continued to launch near-daily airstrikes in Lebanon that it says are aimed at stopping Hezbollah from rebuilding its capabilities. Hezbollah has said it will not discuss disarming until Israel stops its strikes and withdraws its forces from all of southern Lebanon. While the U.S. has been pushing for Hezbollah's disarmament, Barrack described the matter as 'internal' to Lebanon. 'There's no consequence, there's no threat, there's no whip, we're here on a voluntary basis trying to usher in a solution,' he said. He added that the U.S. 'can't compel Israel to do anything' when it comes to the ceasefire. Abby Sewell, The Associated Press


Winnipeg Free Press
11 hours ago
- Winnipeg Free Press
Missing loved ones leave those left behind with ‘ambiguous loss' – a form of frozen grief
Rachel Ganz's husband might be alive. But he might not be. More than three months after he was last seen near the Eleven Point River in Missouri amid severe flooding and evacuation orders, Jon Ganz is just … missing. That leaves Rachel, 45, in a limbo of sorrow and frustration, awakening 'every morning to a reality I don't want to exist in.' She dwells there in a liminal state, she wrote by email July 11, with a stream of questions running through her head: 'Is he trapped by debris in the river? Is he in a tangled mass of debris on the riverbank? Did he wander off into the forested area instead?' And one that remains stubbornly unanswered: 'Are they ever going to find him?' 'Obviously I want my husband returned alive,' she wrote to The Associated Press, 'though I am envious of those who have death certificates.' It's called 'ambiguous loss' Like the families of the missing after the July 4 Texas floods experienced for much of this month, Ganz is suffering from what grief experts call ambiguous loss: the agony of living in the absence of a loved one whose fate is uncertain. Humans across borders, cultures and time unfortunately know it well. Ambiguous loss can be intimate, like Ganz' experience, or global, as in the cases of the missing from the Sept. 11 attacks, tsunamis in the Indian Ocean and Japan, the Turkey-Syria earthquake, the Israel-Hamas war and the Russian invasion of Ukraine. The distinguishing feature, according to Pauline Boss, the researcher who coined the term in the 1970s, is the absence of ritual — a wake, a funeral, throwing dirt on a grave — to help the families left behind accept the loss. The only way forward, experts say, is learning to live with the uncertainty — a concept not well-tolerated in Western cultures. 'We're in a state of mind, a state of the nation, right now where you either win or you lose, it's either black or its white,' said Boss, a professor emeritus at the University of Minnesota who has researched ambiguous loss globally over a half century. 'You have to let go of the binary to get past it, and some never do. They are frozen. They are stuck.' Sarah Wayland, a social work professor from Central Queensland University in Sydney, says ambiguous loss is different from mourning because it's about 'repetitive trauma exposure,' from the 24-hour news cycle and social media. Then there is a devastating quiet that descends on the people left behind when interest has moved on to something else. 'They might be living in this space of dreading but also hoping at the same time,' Wayland said. 'And they are experiencing this loss both publicly and privately.' The uncertainty is like 'a knife constantly making new cuts' Heavy rains drove a wall of water through Texas Hill Country in the middle of the night July 4 , killing at least 132 people and leaving nearly 200 missing as of last week, though that number has dwindled as this week begins. Over just two hours, the Guadalupe River at Comfort, Texas, rose from hip-height to three stories tall, sending water weighing as much as the Empire State building downstream roughly every minute it remained at its crest. Those without bodies to bury have been frozen in a specific state of numbness and horror — and uncertainty. 'It's beyond human imagination to believe that a loved one is dead,' Boss says. This feeling can come in any global circumstance. Lidiia Rudenko, 39, represents a group of families in Ukraine whose relatives are missing in action. Her husband, Sergey, 41, has been missing since June 24, 2024, when his marine brigade battled the Russian army near Krynky. He's one of tens of thousands of Ukrainians missing since the Russian invasion in 2022. And she is one of thousands in Ukraine left behind. 'Some people fall into grief and can no longer do anything, neither act nor think, while others start to act as quickly as possible and take the situation into their own hands, as I did,' Rudenko said. 'There are days when you can't get out of bed,' she said. 'Sometimes we call it 'getting sick. And we allow ourselves to get sick a little, cry it out, live through it, and fight again.' For nearly a decade, Leah Goldin was part of a very small number of people in Israel with the dubious distinction of being the family of of a hostage. Her son, Hadar Goldin, 23, a second lieutenant in the Israeli army, was killed, then his body taken on August 1, 2014. A blood-soaked shirt, prayer fringes and other evidence found in the tunnel where Goldin's body had been held led the Israeli army to determine he'd been killed, she said. His body has never been returned. Her family's journey didn't dovetail with the regular oscillations of grief. They held what Leah Goldin now calls a 'pseudo-funeral' including Goldin's shirt and fringes, at the urging of Israel's military rabbis. But the lingering uncertainty was like a 'knife constantly making new cuts.'. In the dizzying days after Hamas' attack on southern Israel on Oct. 7, 2023, the Goldin family threw themselves into attempting to help hundreds of families of the 251 people Hamas had dragged into Gaza. But for a time, the Goldins found themselves shunned as advocacy for the Oct. 7 hostages surged. 'We were a symbol of failure,' Leah Goldin said. 'People said, 'We aren't like you. Our kids will come back soon.'' She understood their fear, but Goldin, who had spent a decade pushing for Hamas to release her son's body, was devastated by the implication. In time, the hostage families brought her more into the fold, learning from her experience. Hamas still holds 50 Israeli hostages, fewer than half of whom are believed to be alive. In Gaza, Israel's offensive has killed nearly 59,000 Palestinians, more than half of them women and children, according to Gaza's Health Ministry, which doesn't say how many militants have been killed but says over half of the dead have been women and children. Thousands of the dead are believed to be buried under rubble throughout the enclave. How to support families of the missing — and what's not helpful Ganz, whose husband went missing in Missouri in April, said the sheriff's department and others searched far and wide at first. She posted fliers around the town where his car was found, and on social media. Then someone accused her of 'grieving without proof,' a remark that still makes her fume. 'One of my biggest frustrations has been people stating, 'If you need anything, please let me know,'' Ganz said. That puts the burden on her, and follow-through has been hard to come by, she said. 'We already have enough ambiguity.' She's thinking about setting up a nonprofit organization in Jon's honor, dedicated to breaking the stigma against men getting therapy, to show 'that it's not weak.' That tracks with Goldin's thinking that taking action can help resolve loss — and with Rudenko's experience in Ukraine. Boss recommends separate community meetings for families of the confirmed dead and those of the missing. For the latter, a specific acknowledgement is helpful: 'You have to first say to the people, 'What you are experiencing is an ambiguous loss. It's one of the most difficult kinds of losses there is because there's no resolution. It's not your fault,'' Boss said. In Ukraine, Rudenko said it helps to recognize that families of the missing and everyone else live in 'two different worlds.' 'Sometimes we don't need words, because people who have not been affected by ambiguous loss will never find the right words,' she said. 'Sometimes we just need to be hugged and left in silence.'