I may have incurable cancer but I'm happier than ever
I sat in the oncologist's small office last year, my daughter at my side, when I received my diagnosis.
'The scan results show that the cancer has spread to your bones, and I can't cure it,' said the doctor.
I was in shock. My stomach dropped, I was suddenly freezing, and a rush filled my ears, rendering me deaf for a second.
It was my daughter who asked, 'How long?'. She was crying while she held my hand tightly.
The doctor went on to explain that my prognosis was in the order of years, which was a ray of light in the gloom.
But despite this shattering news, or possibly even as a result of it, nearly 12 months on, I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life.
I'm on a course of non invasive treatment that is working to keep the cancer at bay, and I've found a real purpose in life, to help others through challenging times.
Before I was diagnosed, I ran a wedding cake business alongside a training academy for bakers who wanted to start their own companies.
I started this career after 30 years of working as a teacher, a job that had left me stressed and unhappy. I was determined to create a new path for myself that would give me the freedom and satisfaction that my old one couldn't.
I loved my wedding cake work, but still felt that something was missing. I wanted to give back, but I'd yet to find a way to do it.
Then, in April 2024, I found a lump in my breast. Following appointments, scans and biopsies, a month later, I was diagnosed with grade 2 breast cancer.
Initially, the cancer was believed to be curable, but the doctors needed to be sure, and so I was sent for a PET scan, a deep dive scan that creates a 3D image of your insides.
Five days later, I was called in to see the doctor.
I was expecting to be given my treatment plan, which I was previously told would include chemotherapy, radiotherapy and surgery – instead, I was told that the cancer was incurable.
This was a shock, and for a few days I felt numb, the doctor's words 'I can't cure it' going round in my head.
Following the news, my daughters – Heather and Elfie, 23 and 20 at the time of my diagnosis – and I spent a few days alone. We talked, sat in silence, watched comfort TV, and even managed to laugh. After four days in this bubble, things started to change.
I've always been a positive person, but more so since discovering the theory of growth mindset five years ago.
At the end of my teaching career, I was given the book Mindset by Dr Carol Dweck, and it went on to change my outlook on life.
The principles are simple: We are all in control of our life decisions, and although we may encounter barriers, it ultimately comes down to the choices we make regarding how we deal with them.
I believe that life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you deal with it, so I decided I wasn't going to let my diagnosis floor me. After all, I was told I would be around for years. So why not make them count?
My daughters and I have made sure we've sent more time together.
Visiting West Horsley Place, the location of the BBC series Ghosts, was one highlight. The girls have become members of The National Trust so we can all go for days out, and we visited my brother, who lives in Lisbon, and spent four days exploring the city.
I also knew I wanted to use my circumstances to help others, and I felt I now had a power that would make people listen. So, five days after my diagnosis, I started a blog, detailing my experience and my attitude towards it.
Over the next few months, I sought a way to use my circumstances for a good cause. The answer lay very close to me.
My daughters were always there for me. They came to appointments, drove me to scans, and sat with me so I didn't have to be alone.
You can find out more about The Chronicles of Hope, here.
Though they were supporting me, I wanted to support them, but soon realised there wasn't much help available for young adults in their position.
That's when The Chronicles of Hope CIC was born. Only five months after my diagnosis, the three of us had worked out the aims of what we wanted to achieve, and by December 2024, we were up and running.
I now have a purpose.
The Chronicles of Hope works like a charity; our plan is to provide emotional and financial support for young adults whose parent or carer has been diagnosed with a life limiting illness.
We want to launch 'memory making experiences' for these families, and host events where people going through similar experiences can connect. More Trending
Now, I'm making the most of every day, creating amazing memories for me, my daughters and my loved ones.
We were able to visit family in Singapore in March, and took a five day trip to Bali while we were there. We're also West End Theatre goers now, having already seen Hamilton and The Lion King, with Wicked being our next excursion, and we absolutely love this time we spend together.
I might have a life-limiting illness, but I have no intention of limiting my life.
Not only has my diagnosis led to a project that fills my heart with joy, but it's also given me a lust for life.
Do you have a story you'd like to share? Get in touch by emailing jess.austin@metro.co.uk.
Share your views in the comments below.
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MORE: My family day out was ruined by hundreds of swearing hikers
MORE: I've worked hard to lose weight only to be met with Ozempic accusations
MORE: I'll never go on another slum tour after speaking to a local
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Metro
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I may have incurable cancer but I'm happier than ever
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Before I was diagnosed, I ran a wedding cake business alongside a training academy for bakers who wanted to start their own companies. I started this career after 30 years of working as a teacher, a job that had left me stressed and unhappy. I was determined to create a new path for myself that would give me the freedom and satisfaction that my old one couldn't. I loved my wedding cake work, but still felt that something was missing. I wanted to give back, but I'd yet to find a way to do it. Then, in April 2024, I found a lump in my breast. Following appointments, scans and biopsies, a month later, I was diagnosed with grade 2 breast cancer. Initially, the cancer was believed to be curable, but the doctors needed to be sure, and so I was sent for a PET scan, a deep dive scan that creates a 3D image of your insides. Five days later, I was called in to see the doctor. I was expecting to be given my treatment plan, which I was previously told would include chemotherapy, radiotherapy and surgery – instead, I was told that the cancer was incurable. This was a shock, and for a few days I felt numb, the doctor's words 'I can't cure it' going round in my head. Following the news, my daughters – Heather and Elfie, 23 and 20 at the time of my diagnosis – and I spent a few days alone. We talked, sat in silence, watched comfort TV, and even managed to laugh. After four days in this bubble, things started to change. I've always been a positive person, but more so since discovering the theory of growth mindset five years ago. At the end of my teaching career, I was given the book Mindset by Dr Carol Dweck, and it went on to change my outlook on life. The principles are simple: We are all in control of our life decisions, and although we may encounter barriers, it ultimately comes down to the choices we make regarding how we deal with them. I believe that life is 10% what happens to you, and 90% how you deal with it, so I decided I wasn't going to let my diagnosis floor me. After all, I was told I would be around for years. So why not make them count? My daughters and I have made sure we've sent more time together. Visiting West Horsley Place, the location of the BBC series Ghosts, was one highlight. The girls have become members of The National Trust so we can all go for days out, and we visited my brother, who lives in Lisbon, and spent four days exploring the city. I also knew I wanted to use my circumstances to help others, and I felt I now had a power that would make people listen. So, five days after my diagnosis, I started a blog, detailing my experience and my attitude towards it. Over the next few months, I sought a way to use my circumstances for a good cause. The answer lay very close to me. My daughters were always there for me. They came to appointments, drove me to scans, and sat with me so I didn't have to be alone. You can find out more about The Chronicles of Hope, here. Though they were supporting me, I wanted to support them, but soon realised there wasn't much help available for young adults in their position. That's when The Chronicles of Hope CIC was born. Only five months after my diagnosis, the three of us had worked out the aims of what we wanted to achieve, and by December 2024, we were up and running. I now have a purpose. The Chronicles of Hope works like a charity; our plan is to provide emotional and financial support for young adults whose parent or carer has been diagnosed with a life limiting illness. We want to launch 'memory making experiences' for these families, and host events where people going through similar experiences can connect. More Trending Now, I'm making the most of every day, creating amazing memories for me, my daughters and my loved ones. We were able to visit family in Singapore in March, and took a five day trip to Bali while we were there. We're also West End Theatre goers now, having already seen Hamilton and The Lion King, with Wicked being our next excursion, and we absolutely love this time we spend together. I might have a life-limiting illness, but I have no intention of limiting my life. Not only has my diagnosis led to a project that fills my heart with joy, but it's also given me a lust for life. Do you have a story you'd like to share? Get in touch by emailing Share your views in the comments below. View More » MORE: My family day out was ruined by hundreds of swearing hikers MORE: I've worked hard to lose weight only to be met with Ozempic accusations MORE: I'll never go on another slum tour after speaking to a local Your free newsletter guide to the best London has on offer, from drinks deals to restaurant reviews.
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