‘Everyone I know in the US who has a conscience wants to leave': Why this American woman relocated to Bali

CNN

2 days ago

Riding along the busy, narrow roads of Bali on her scooter with the sun illuminating her face, Victoria Kjos has a clear destination in sight — the beach.
The 71-year-old American, who relocated to the Indonesian destination in 2022, is a regular fixture on the sands of Sanur, which extends along the southeastern coastline of the tropical destination, known as the 'Island of the Gods.'
When she's not enjoying one of Bali's finest stretches of shoreline, Victoria can be found exploring sites like Besakih, a temple complex known as the 'Mother Temple of Bali,' located on the slopes of Mount Agung, the island's highest volcano, or enjoying a massage at a local spa.
Her life today is miles apart from the one she built in the US, where she had a long career in government, serving as the deputy state treasurer of North Dakota back in 1979.
Victoria says she is now happily settled in the Southeast Asian destination, known for its rice fields, monkey-filled forests and ancient temples, and doesn't see herself ever returning to the United States.
'For me the best thing (about living in Bali) is probably the weather,' Victoria tells CNN Travel of the 'magical place' she now calls home. 'It's the same all year long. I haven't needed a long-sleeved sweater or jacket ever in three years.'
But her motivation to move to the island was something more serious — disillusionment with life in the United States.
'On the surface, as viewed from the outside, I should have had no complaints,' she says. Having also worked in real estate, banking and as a yoga instructor, in later life she had built a relatively comfortable life for herself in Phoenix, Arizona.
'I owned a nice home in a good neighborhood. Drove a convertible sports car. Frequented theater, opera, art gallery opening events. Shared regular repasts with dear friends and family,' she says.
However, Victoria found that she was continuously witnessing 'trends that didn't really mesh' with her beliefs and felt that she needed a 'more meaningful existence.' She says she wanted more than her 'middle class US existence' offered her.
'I started to see that our culture had become so self-absorbed,' she says. 'So me-driven, and so money-centric, that I questioned whether or not that's where I wanted to spend the rest of my life.'
It was these thoughts, the sense of growing dissatisfaction, that set her on the road to Bali. But her journey there was far from smooth. In fact, she says it wasn't even one of her top choices when she was considering places to move to
In 2012, Victoria sold her house in Arizona, along with her car, and got rid of most of her personal belongings, before embarking in a 'spiritual journey' to India, armed with only a couple of guidebooks.
'I didn't know how long I would stay,' she says. 'I didn't know what the journey would be like.
She spent around six months on a 'life-altering and incredibly transformative' trip around India. She traveled through 13 states, visiting temples, meditation caves and gardens, and practicing chanting, yoga and meditation.
'I 'm a different person because of India,' she says. 'I hope I've become a kinder, less judgmental, more patient and thoughtful human being.'
The next few years saw her spend more time in Asia, including an 18-month stint in India in 2017, and then four months in Thailand, in the coastal town of Hua Hin, near Bangkok. There was also a visit to Nepal.
All the while, Bali was slowly seeping into her consciousness.
'I kept meeting fellow travelers who would say, 'Oh, you must go to Bali. It's wonderful.' And I thought, 'Why not?''
In 2019, Victoria finally traveled to Bali and instantly fell in love with the destination. 'There are some who believe there's a convergence of various energy vortexes in Bali, which gives it its magical quality,' she says. 'There is something very special here, and I did feel it immediately.'
When she returned to the US, Victoria felt that it was finally time to put roots down somewhere new, but despite being enthralled by the 'magic' of Bali, she initially opted for 'close and convenient' Mexico, moving to the Pacific resort town of Mazatlán in 2020, where she anticipated spending the rest of her life.
Just over two years later, she reconsidered. 'I decided Mexico really wasn't the right place for me,' she says, explaining that she was unhappy with the 'party place' reputation of her chosen destination. She thought again about India, but by then Bali had won her over.
'And I had liked Bali, so it ended up being kind of the final choice for me.'
Another incentive: Indonesia offers a retirement visa, known as a KITAS, and Victoria met the income requirements.
Moving to a new country twice within a few years might seem like a daunting prospect, but she says it was made easier by her personal circumstances.
'I was married for a brief period, but I've been alone most of my life… I don't have children,' she says. 'So, it's much easier for me to kind of pick up and move, than it is for people that have kids and grandkids that kind of pull on the heartstrings.'
And so, in May 2022, Victoria arrived in Bali to begin her new life and says she 'immediately felt very comfortable.'
'There was never any question that I wouldn't stay,' she adds, describing how she quickly became enthralled by Balinese culture, which is rooted in traditions and spirituality, and loved its 'calm energy.'
Victoria found locals to be very welcoming and had little trouble making new friends, despite not speaking Balinese or Indonesian.
But, she says she made a lot of 'missteps' in her first few months in Bali, particularly when it came to finding a place to live.
'Everybody's a real estate agent,' she says. 'But they really aren't. (It's an) everybody has a friend who has a friend, who has a friend kind of thing.'
After moving in and out of several places, Victoria eventually settled in Sanur, a quiet coastal town with a strong Balinese community that is known for its beautiful beaches. It is, says Victoria, jokingly referred to as 'Snore' due to its laidback atmosphere, and popularity with retirees and families.
Victoria lives in a small, modern, gated house, which features traditional Balinese-style sliding glass front doors and high ceilings, with one bedroom, a living room, kitchen and bathroom.
'My neighbor's dog barking is the only noise I ever hear here,' she says. 'So it's almost like my wake-up call or a reminder of the outside world.'
Victoria, who describes herself as an 'avowed introvert,' concedes that she socializes even less in Bali than she did in the US, but says that this suits her just fine.
'I was one of those people that loved Covid,' she says, recalling lockdowns implemented during the pandemic. 'I was in heaven, because I live kind of like a hermit.'
While she's been trying to learn Balinese, Victoria says that most of her friends in the country speak English and she often finds that locals prefer to speak her native language with her, even though she wants to practice.
'I think it's really important in any foreign country to learn the language, not only to benefit you and understand but also as respect,' she says. 'I'm actually more interested in learning the language to read the signs on the street and things, more so than speaking.'
Although she's encountered many other foreigners who've moved to Bali, Victoria says she feels more connected to Balinese people and her friends are mainly locals.
'I haven't met a single expat here who is on that same path as I am,' she says. 'So, I spend my time with locals, not foreigners. Because I have more in common with them spiritually.'
Victoria says she's an admirer of how family oriented local culture is.
'It would be like in my country a century ago, where the grandparents and the parents and the kids and the grandkids all lived in the same house,' she says.
'Generations resided together. We don't live like that in America. Once you're 17 or 18, you go off to college and you never want to go home again.'
She's also noticed that life in Bali, which is a Hindu-majority region of Muslim-majority Indonesia, seems to revolve around ceremonies, which frequently take priority over work or activities.
'There are ceremonies for everything. From the baby being born to the baby being named, to the cremation, to the anniversary of the cremation,' she says. ''The ceremony comes first, which would be unheard of in my country. Except for major holidays like Christmas, Easter and Thanksgiving.'
Last year, Victoria was invited to a Balinese cremation ceremony, known as Ngaben, and was the only non-local in attendance. 'Hence, I felt like an honored guest, witnessing the traditional washing of the body on the first day and the actual cremation on the second, with elaborate rituals, drumming, music, meals, and processions.'
Bali is much slower paced than she's used to, which has its pros and cons, according to Victoria.
'Sometimes I find myself standing in the grocery line and it takes like 15 minutes and three people to do something that in the United States would take five minutes,' she says. 'But it's just the way it is.'
As the cost of living is lower in Bali, Victoria's money goes further, which means she's able to afford things that she would once have considered luxuries.
'Ordering from catering services and through the food delivery is so inexpensive, almost embarrassingly,' she says, pointing out that she rarely cooks, and her housing costs are around a quarter less than they were in the United States.
'So, I don't do laundry for the same reason. It's inexpensive to take it next door, a minute away.'
She gets around mainly via motor scooter, which she learned to ride at the age of 65, and while she's had a 'couple of spills' on Balinese roads, Victoria prefers two-wheel transport to a car due to regular traffic snarls in Bali.
'I'm cautious,' she says. 'And I'm old. I know my reflexes are slower than the kids. So I kind of drive slowly to the left. People pass me all the time, but I don't really care.'
Although Victoria suffers from a chronic medical condition, which causes pain and fatigue, she describes herself as in 'relatively good health,' pointing out that she also walks as much as she can, and goes to yoga classes regularly.
She says she's had positive experiences with the local healthcare system, which consists of both public and private healthcare providers.
'I am fortunate enough to be on the government health insurance program, which is very affordable,' she says, adding that she also has a private insurance plan that would cover her for 'something major.'
Victoria points out that the standard of care is not the same as 'in the West or other countries.'
'My feeling is, if you're going to live here, you kind of have to suck it up…' she says. 'If you want Western medicine, then stay in a Western country. But overall, I've been pleased.'
She notes that 'retirement centers or homes and assisted living options' are 'non-existent' in Bali as families tend to care for their elderly relatives in their later years, quipping that she may have no choice but to return to the US if she lives 'too long.'
But after residing in the Indonesian island for three years, Victoria says she can't imagine going back to the life she had before.
'I jokingly say, 'The only way I'm setting foot back in the United States is if I'm demented,'' she says. 'Everyone that has a conscience and a soul in the United States that I know wants to leave now.'
Victoria plans to convert her retirement visa to a KITAP visa, or permanent stay permit card, which is valid for five years, within the next two years.
However, she admits that she misses simple things about living in the US, such as being able to do all of her shopping in one place.
'I know it seems sort of silly,' she says. 'But the difference is the shopping options – we get kind of spoiled (in the US).
'There's a major drugstore in every corner. You can go in, and buy everything at one place. Here, you have to go to 10 different shops and little markets. You don't have the same kind of availability.'
Victoria also misses going to the opera and theater regularly, but stresses that there's 'nothing to be sad about' as she was an 'active participant in those activities for 40 years.'
Although she's happily settled in Bali, Victoria concedes that she hasn't ruled out moving 'elsewhere,' describing herself as a 'vagabond.'
'I've learned never to say 'never' and always to remain flexible,' she says. Her main focus now is trying 'to live a little more consciously' and 'being of service' during what she describes as the 'last phase' of her life.
'A person's life is enriched by variety and change,' Victoria adds. 'And, I feel incredibly blessed to finish out my life in such a beautiful, peaceful location.'