3 Reasons Behind Leaders' ‘Retirement Syndrome'— By A Psychologist

Forbes

5 days ago

The fear of retirement can be overwhelming for many people, particularly when they're unsure of what ... More life will look like without the structure and purpose that work once provided.
Do you remember the 2015 movie The Intern? Seventy-year-old widower Ben Whittaker, played by Robert De Niro, found out very soon after retiring that 'rest' is far from what he needed. In a desperate bid to get back in the game, he wound up as a senior intern at a big fashion start-up.
'I just know there's a hole in my life and I need to fill it... soon,' Ben says at one point.
This is how a lot of retirees feel after working for decades. Stepping away from power, purpose and routine can be deeply uncomfortable and not having set goals to work toward can be terrifying. They're plagued by uncertainty, wondering what comes next.
A classic study published in the European Management Journal explored the financial, social and psychological barriers that retirees — especially leaders — faced when they were retiring. Researcher Manfred Kets de Vries found that the following three issues troubled them the most:
Many leaders find it hard to step away from power, even when they sense they've reached their peak. They may start to feel disconnected or dissatisfied with their lives, feeling as though they lack direction and don't look forward to new challenges.
This reluctance to move on, as well as experiences of loneliness, financial stress and purposelessness, are at the core of what researchers call 'retirement syndrome.' If you've spent your life building something, being heard and staying in control, the thought of suddenly feeling 'irrelevant' or not knowing what comes next can be hard to digest.
Here are three key psychological reasons why retirement syndrome can weigh people down, especially if they were previously in leadership positions.
1. You Fear Losing Your Sense Of Purpose
For many leaders, work becomes their way of life. Kets de Vries' study explores three stages to the lifecycle of a CEO.
The third stage is when CEOs are encouraged to retire and let someone else take the wheel. But this can be difficult, especially if retirement is not their choice. Many find that work makes up a significant portion (or even the entirety) of their identity.
So when it's time to step away, it can feel like the ground is being ripped out from underneath them. Suddenly, they're left wondering how to stay balanced without the role that defined them. They're forced to confront their new reality.
Retirement may feel less like a choice and more like a fall from grace; like losing a title that gave them purpose. Many start to fear that only a sense of nothingness comes after.
'How do I spend the rest of my days? You name it. Golf. Books. Movies. Pinochle. Tried yoga, learned to cook, bought some plants, took classes in Mandarin... Believe me, I've tried everything,' says De Niro as Ben in The Intern, capturing this feeling perfectly.
Not only do leaders feel the pain of losing their work life, they also have to come to terms with their loss of power and declining health.
If you're edging close to retirement, start thinking about potentially using your experience to help others through volunteering and consulting work. You can also start to rediscover your hobbies and try mentoring juniors who are looking to enter your profession.
After decades of 'hustling,' you could also consider building a 'softer' life, where you allow yourself to rest, engage in hobbies you love and create renewed purpose at your own pace.
2. You Dread Facing The Fallout Of Your Leadership
There is an ancient 'eye-for-an-eye' principle called 'lex talionis.' Derived from early Babylonian law, this principle states that prisoners should receive a punishment that equals the crime they committed.
Leaders have to make tough decisions for their company, whether they are in the form of mass layoffs, implementation of new technologies or changes in company policies. This can lead them to fear vengeance, albeit unconsciously, for their past wrongdoings.
The longer you stay in a leadership role, the more people you inevitably upset, whether it's competitors, rivals or even colleagues. No good leader makes it through their career without stepping on a few toes.
Over time, fears starts to culminate: What if the people I fired come after me? What if someone sues me once I'm no longer protected by my title?
Even if you don't realize it, this fear of retaliation can creep in and quietly shape how you lead. These fears can be so intense, that they can even lead to insomnia and anxiety, or an avoidance of retirement altogether.
In fact, research published in Human Relations highlights how revenge can show up in an organizational dynamic. Leaders may project their personal need for vengeance onto the company's competitors, markets or even their own staff.
Researchers use the example of Lee Iacocca, who was fired from Ford by Henry Ford II in 1978. Iacocca then joined Ford's direct rival Chrysler, which was struggling financially at the time. He made it his mission to save Chrysler, competing with Ford in the market. Iacocca's personal pride likely fueled this determination.
If you are close to retiring, it might help you to seek closure with former colleagues or teams when possible. You can even try consulting legal or HR professionals if you're genuinely concerned about future consequences.
3. You Fear Losing Control Of What You've Built
If you've spent years or even decades building a company from scratch, the fear that a successor may dismantle it can be gut-wrenching, even if the fear is unfounded. Additionally, when newcomers join the company, it's common to experience resentment and jealousy.
'Leaders who cannot get beyond envy of their successor generate anger not only at the younger man or woman but at the ungrateful next generation, society at large, and the aging process,' the researcher notes.
Watching younger professionals rise while you step aside can be surprisingly painful. It's because you realize how much time and how many opportunities they still have, while you lose out on both.
This generational envy can lead to bitterness, passive-aggressive behavior or even attempts to sabotage the person next in line. If you think mentoring them might bring out your worst, try to step away for a bit and reframe their success. View them as extensions of your legacy, rather than competitors.
View them as people whose expertise and perspective you can gain from, rather than an ungrateful generation with no knowledge to offer.
If you're grappling with these challenging feelings, you can also try to redirect them toward more meaningful contributions. You can create archives, guidelines or even write a memoir for the generations that follow. But, you have to let go eventually.
Retirement can be a tough transition for many. But, it doesn't signal the end of your purpose or your relevance.
This is your time to explore who you are outside of work. You finally get to travel more, learn about new things and reconnect with your family. You get to rest after working tirelessly for years on end.
Don't stop learning, and more importantly, don't forget to practice gratitude for the journey you've had so far. Now, you get to write the next chapter on your own terms.
Do you feel limited by retirement or believe you can still continue growing? Take the science-backed Growth Mindset Scale to find out.