I grew up in Boston and moved across the country for a change. Now, reaching my 30s, I can't wait to go back home.
It's always been my fear that I would end up as a "townie" and only ever live in Boston. However, after living in Denver and now Seattle, I'm realizing as I get older that I want to be closer to my family and friends, most of whom are on the East Coast.
Leaving Boston made me realize where I truly belong
After four years in Denver, I missed the rain and the ocean, but I wasn't ready to call it quits and return to the East Coast, yet.
My fiancé and I moved to Seattle about six months ago seeking a fresh atmosphere. I was beyond ecstatic for the new destination.
However, ever since the move, I find myself with gut-wrenching homesickness as I approach my 30s.
I'm thinking about having kids. I'm thinking about my parents getting older. I'm thinking about my 6-month-old nephew whom I've only seen twice.
I've fallen in love with Seattle, but am already planning my exit
When I started moving around and exploring, I thought I was looking for that perfect place to settle down and call home.
It turns out I was just gathering life lessons and finding new reasons to appreciate where I grew up. Now, I know for sure that back home in Boston is where I want to plant my roots.
These feelings are tough for me. I basically just got to Seattle, and want to stay at least a few years to indulge in the Pacific Northwest and give the city the chance it deserves, but my heart is already set on leaving. My Boston-born fiancé feels the same.
In the months I've been here, I've found plenty of reasons to adore Seattle. The fresh seafood, the bustle of Pike Place Market, and the panoramic views of Mount Rainier all make the city special.
Whether it's a grungy music show at a local bar or a vibrant Seattle Mariners game, the culture here is passionate and authentic. However, for me, it's not home.
The idea of being so far from my parents as they get older, only ever seeing my best friends once a year with a $500 plane ticket, and trying to raise a child 3,000 miles from my family feels sad and infeasible.
There's something about every city I'll miss
I'm glad I've escaped the "townie" title and experienced places outside my comfort zone. Moving across the country has been liberating, and I'll forever miss things like the Nepalese restaurant just outside Denver, and the pebbly beach in West Seattle where the love of my life proposed to me.
I'll miss the blue Rocky Mountains being the backdrop for everything in Colorado, and I'll miss the lush Washington forests with moss-covered trees. I reminisce about Red Rocks concerts as much as I do Red Sox games.
I'm proud of myself for trying something new. If I'd never left Boston, I think I'd be full of resentment toward myself and the city. All I feel now is a sweet homesickness that affirms it's where I'm meant to be.
Denver and Seattle are breathtakingly beautiful places with unique energy, but nothing quite soothes my soul like the quaint and often rugged atmosphere of New England.
That East Coast character is a part of who I am, but I'll carry pieces of Denver and Seattle for the rest of my days. Namely, my goofy dog was born and adopted in Denver, and she'll always be my favorite souvenir from that city.
We're looking forward to returning to a life of lobster rolls and Dunkin' coffees, but for now, we'll bask in the rainy Seattle days and succulent Dungeness crab a little longer.
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