Brooding ‘black cat' boyfriends have pushed aside ‘golden retriever' heartthrobs: ‘He's not perfect, but he's real'

New York Post

a day ago

Say goodbye to the 'golden retriever' boyfriend — and hello to the 'black cat.'
For years, there's been a lot of love for the former — doe-eyed boys who romance their partners with lovey-dovey sentiments and a cheerful energy.
Those men possess similar qualities to a golden retriever: sweet, gentle, affectionate, eager to please and even easy to train. Sometimes they also share some physical attributes with the breed: an adorable smile, big brown eyes and golden hair.
4 The golden retriever boyfriend romances partners with sweet sentiments.
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Now, people are pining after 'black cat boyfriends' — the quiet, mysterious, brooding and complicated guy.
Black cats are not ones to make big romantic gestures, but despite their detached exterior, they're emotional underneath and feel things very deeply.
Take it from the character everyone is rooting for in Jenny Han's 'The Summer I Turned Pretty.' Conrad Fisher, portrayed by Christopher Brinley, is the brooding older brother who's hard to read, ultimately resulting in his heartbreak.
Conrad is Belly's (Lola Tung) first love, but his emotional unavailability led her to date his brother, Jeremiah (Gavin Casalegno), the irresponsible frat bro. But fans online are still rooting for Conrad, seeing from the outside that he pulled away due to his big emotions.
In Lena Dunham's new show 'Too Much,' Will Sharpe's Felix was an instant heartthrob, an enigmatic character with a ragged denim jacket and messy black hair that Jess (played by 'Hacks' actor Meg Stalter) sees performing at a London dive bar. He doesn't dote over her at all; he simply wins Jess over with his charm before showing any emotion.
4 People are pining after 'black cat boyfriends' — quiet, mysterious, brooding and complicated guys.
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'This shift isn't just about characters being darker or moodier,' PR expert Chad Teixeira told the Daily Mail. 'It reflects a larger generational shift in how people understand relationships, emotional growth, and vulnerability.
'Gen Z, more than previous generations, tend to value emotional realism over idealism,' he added. 'The black cat boyfriend complicates the traditional romantic arc. He's not perfect, but he's real.'
The hit Netflix show 'Ginny and Georgia' shows this, too. Ginny (Antonia Gentry) tries to date the sweet, popular boy but doesn't feel any connection. She inevitably falls for her troubled and perplexing bad-boy neighbor, Marcus (Felix Mallard).
As the series goes on, Marcus starts to unveil his emotional and sensitive side, which has viewers rooting for the two to end up together.
4 Despite their detached exterior, black cats are emotional underneath and feel things very deeply.
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And this kind of boyfriend archetype isn't new to pop culture — think Jess Mariano in 'Gilmore Girls,' Chuck Bass in 'Gossip Girl,' Angel in 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer,' Lucas Scott in 'One Tree Hill,' or even Carmy in Emmy-winning 'The Bear.'
People have long been swooning over the black cat beau, and it's their mysterious nature that makes them irresistible.
'There's a desire to get beyond the mystery and see what lies within,' psychotherapist Amy Morin told USA Today. 'We might think they'd be willing to be vulnerable if they were in a trusting, healthy relationship. We want to see the walls come down so we can learn more about how they really feel.'
4 People have long been swooning over the black cat boyfriend, and it's their mysterious nature that makes them irresistible.
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Having those walls come down is important for young boys and men to understand emotional intelligence, which can ultimately lead to long-lasting and strong relationships as well as mental wellness in general.
'It's breaking the masculine code, stepping out of the man box, and saying, 'Yeah, I'm vulnerable,'' Ronald Levant, a professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Akron and co-author of 'The Problem with Men: Insights on Overcoming a Traumatic Childhood from a World-Renowned Psychologist,' told the outlet.
And while sometimes the so-called 'bad boy' can eventually soften — even Chuck and Blair got married on 'Gossip Girl' — Morin warned that there is a 'danger to romanticizing emotionally unavailable men.
'There may be a desire to fix them or help them so that they can grow closer and become more trusting. But, in reality, they might prefer avoidance,' she explained.
'So, while it sounds intriguing to pursue a mysterious man, he just might not be emotionally available. And it's not your job to draw it out of him or change him.'