The new fines for plane passengers don't go far enough

Times

4 hours ago

The most annoying part of every flight? It has to be those ten minutes at the end, after landing. The plane comes to a stop and half of the passengers jump up and grab their bags, sometimes rushing down the aisle so they're closer to the exit. And then they … just stand there, backside in a stranger's face, waiting for the doors to open. Meanwhile, the other, more polite half remain seated, eyebrows raised in disapproval at their travel companions. It reminds me of sitting out of PE at school — what a load of idiots, I thought, running around and making themselves fitter. I was wrong about that. But I'm confident in my dim view of 'aisle lice', the admittedly unpleasant online term for those who clog the aircraft at the end of a flight.
Why do they do it? One pilot on a Reddit thread puts forward the sympathetic theory that, after the stress of travelling in an aluminium tube 35,000 feet in the air, 'you subconsciously have a relief mechanism that says 'thank God that worked out''. You could also argue that passengers simply want to stretch their legs (though it happens on super-short trips too and I would point out that the aisle is always available for a quick mid-flight promenade). But I reckon this is a matter of nurture rather than nature. Not only do these misguided travellers simply want to disembark asap — enjoy the wait at the baggage carousel, guys! — they have also learnt through experience that if they don't get up and block the way, someone behind them is going to barge past and hotfoot it down the aisle first. There may also be considerable pressure from their row-mates to rise.
One country is heroically fighting back against this vicious cycle. Turkey's Directorate General of Civil Aviation has announced that, following a significant increase in complaints from passengers, those arriving in the country who stand up before the seatbelt sign turns off will be fined about £50. And in an indication that this is about etiquette as much as safety — the concern being that travellers could injure themselves if the plane brakes suddenly while taxiing or bags fall out of overhead lockers — airlines have also been told to issue an announcement encouraging holidaymakers to 'respect the disembarkation priority of the passengers in front of or around you and wait for your turn'. Too right.
Two questions immediately spring to mind. First, I'm not convinced that ordering 150 exhausted humans to do this without precise instructions is going to work, so how will the turn-taking be enforced? My suggestion would be to return to the Covid-era policy of making passengers stand up and disembark row by row. We were all compliant with that rule then — and the budget Spanish carrier Vueling still does this, letting five rows go at a time — so I don't see why it wouldn't work now.
The second question: if we're going to clamp down on bad airline manners during disembarkation, could this be a good opportunity to scrutinise other iffy behaviour that may affect the entire flight rather than just the final stretch? I have three pet peeves that, while they may not merit a fine, certainly deserve a good ticking-off from attendants: 'bare beating' (the trend for listening to music or watching films out loud on public transport has now spread to planes, which obviously isn't on); lingering in the aisle and chatting to your pals further down the plane (you've got the whole holiday to do that); and taking your socks off (doesn't need explaining). The real reason the aisle lice are in such a rush to get off? Maybe they just want to escape their fellow passengers.
Have you seen bad passenger behaviour on planes? How would you tackle it? Let us know in the comments below