Latest news with #LauraWindsor
Yahoo
05-07-2025
- Business
- Yahoo
How much cash should you give at a wedding, according to etiquette experts
In lots of countries and cultures it's the norm to give couples cash when they tie the knot. In fact, it's often an integral part of the celebrations. In Greece and Cyprus guests pin bank notes to a dancing bride, while in Nigeria couples are literally sprayed with money as well wishers dance around them, throwing cash one note at a time. While it's becoming increasingly common for British couples to turn their backs on the traditional gift registry and ask for cash gifts too, working out just how much to give and how to go about handing it over is something of an etiquette minefield. Here Telegraph Money talks to two etiquette experts and a personal finance specialist to share their tips. 'First and foremost, you should give what you can afford, and never feel pressured into giving beyond your comfort zone,' says Liz Wyse, etiquette adviser at Debrett's. 'If the couple getting married are relatives or very close friends, you will naturally be more generous.' But, if it's a destination wedding, or you've had to spend a lot of money just to attend, she adds that it's fine to downgrade the amount you give. You shouldn't, however, use any pre-wedding antics as a reason to give less. 'Stag and hen-dos should not really come into the equation, because they are organised by the best man or chief bridesmaid, not the couple,' she says. Laura Windsor, who runs the eponymous Etiquette Academy, says that as a guide, the typical gift is between £50 to £150. 'If you are close friends or family, a gift of around £75 to £150 is appropriate. Those less closely connected to the couple may spend considerably less.' Rather than debating the merits of a bank transfer (too crass?) or cash in an envelope (might get lost?), it's best to get a steer from the couple tying the knot. Considerate couples should provide you with some guidance. An online wedding cash registry makes it easy for your guests to give you money – they can choose how much they want to give and it may feel less demanding (or risky) than presenting them with your sort code and account number. However, our etiquette experts warn that you still need to take care when telling friends and family you'd prefer cash gifts. Although it's becoming more common for couples to ask for money on their wedding day, 'a bald request for money will still be disconcerting for many people,' says Wyse. Laura Windsor, who runs an Etiquette Academy, agrees and says you should never ask for cash on your wedding invitations. 'Word of mouth is still considered the most polite method of telling guests about gifts, so if you are asking for a cash fund, getting your friends and family involved to spread the word about the registry is the most delicate approach and will help move things along.' It is still worth adding the registry link to your invitation and then adding cash as one option for giving. It can also help if you tell your guests what you'll be spending the money on – especially if some guests aren't on board with the idea. 'Be upfront about where the money is going, whether it be for home improvement, your honeymoon or a down payment on a house.' Wyse agrees: 'If you suggest that a guest might like to make a contribution towards, for example, your honeymoon or a large purchase, such as a sofa, it is much more acceptable.' Many online cash registries will let you customise your fund, so guests can see where their money will be going when they log on to contribute. In recent years some couples have opted for an even more online option, putting out QR codes at the wedding itself with a link to give money on the day. 'It's their day so I guess if you are a guest you have to play by their rules,' says Windsor. 'It's a little transactional but today it's all about convenience and practicality as well as instant gratification.' This is a tricky one. Wyse says it's your prerogative to give whatever you like, but she warns that you might need to put your thinking cap on if you decide to buy them a gift instead. 'Generally, if couples are asking for money, that means there will not be a conventional wedding gift list, probably because the couple have already set up their home and do not have any pressing household needs. So if you want to give a gift instead of money you will need to find something quirky, unique or original.' But there is always the risk that the couple won't be thankful – especially if their taste is not the same as yours. Sarah Coles, head of personal finance at Hargreaves Lansdown, points out there's always one person at every wedding that turns up with homewares the couple didn't want or need. 'If you're very close to them, and giving them a really special gift they'll treasure for life, there's an argument that this is the exception to the rule,' she suggests. 'If it's a more distant relative, and you're hoping to give them a vase or a candle, then chances are they'd prefer the cash.' However much you have spent attending the wedding, all our experts agree it's not OK to turn up without a gift at all. Not only is a wedding a significant life event, but it's a lavish act of hospitality too. 'It's traditionally frowned upon to show up and not give a gift at all – in the same way you wouldn't rock up to a child's birthday party without a present,' says Coles. Wyse adds: 'You really should comply unless, of course, the couple stipulate that they do not want presents, or ask you to make a donation to a charity instead.' If you really can't afford either a gift or to attend the wedding, Coles says it's important to be upfront with the couple. 'Bear in mind that you're not duty bound to go to the wedding if it will cause financial issues. Just thank them for the invitation, explain the situation, and arrange to meet up for a cut-price celebration later.' Broaden your horizons with award-winning British journalism. Try The Telegraph free for 1 month with unlimited access to our award-winning website, exclusive app, money-saving offers and more.
Telegraph
05-07-2025
- Business
- Telegraph
How much cash you should give at a wedding, according to etiquette experts
In lots of countries and cultures it's the norm to give couples cash when they tie the knot. In fact, it's often an integral part of the celebrations. In Greece and Cyprus guests pin bank notes to a dancing bride, while in Nigeria couples are literally sprayed with money as well wishers dance around them, throwing cash one note at a time. While it's becoming increasingly common for British couples to turn their backs on the traditional gift registry and ask for cash gifts too, working out just how much to give and how to go about handing it over is something of an etiquette minefield. Here Telegraph Money talks to two etiquette experts and a personal finance specialist to share their tips. The couple have asked for cash – but how much should I give? 'First and foremost, you should give what you can afford, and never feel pressured into giving beyond your comfort zone,' says Liz Wyse, etiquette adviser at Debrett's. 'If the couple getting married are relatives or very close friends, you will naturally be more generous.' But, if it's a destination wedding, or you've had to spend a lot of money just to attend, she adds that it's fine to downgrade the amount you give. You shouldn't, however, use any pre-wedding antics as a reason to give less. 'Stag and hen-dos should not really come into the equation, because they are organised by the best man or chief bridesmaid, not the couple,' she says. Laura Windsor, who runs the eponymous Etiquette Academy, says that as a guide, the typical gift is between £50 to £150. 'If you are close friends or family, a gift of around £75 to £150 is appropriate. Those less closely connected to the couple may spend considerably less.' What's the best way to give money? Rather than debating the merits of a bank transfer (too crass?) or cash in an envelope (might get lost?), it's best to get a steer from the couple tying the knot. Considerate couples should provide you with some guidance. We're getting married – how can we ask for cash without causing offence? An online wedding cash registry makes it easy for your guests to give you money – they can choose how much they want to give and it may feel less demanding (or risky) than presenting them with your sort code and account number. However, our etiquette experts warn that you still need to take care when telling friends and family you'd prefer cash gifts. Although it's becoming more common for couples to ask for money on their wedding day, 'a bald request for money will still be disconcerting for many people,' says Wyse. Laura Windsor, who runs an Etiquette Academy, agrees and says you should never ask for cash on your wedding invitations. 'Word of mouth is still considered the most polite method of telling guests about gifts, so if you are asking for a cash fund, getting your friends and family involved to spread the word about the registry is the most delicate approach and will help move things along.' It is still worth adding the registry link to your invitation and then adding cash as one option for giving. It can also help if you tell your guests what you'll be spending the money on – especially if some guests aren't on board with the idea. 'Be upfront about where the money is going, whether it be for home improvement, your honeymoon or a down payment on a house.' Wyse agrees: 'If you suggest that a guest might like to make a contribution towards, for example, your honeymoon or a large purchase, such as a sofa, it is much more acceptable.' Many online cash registries will let you customise your fund, so guests can see where their money will be going when they log on to contribute. In recent years some couples have opted for an even more online option, putting out QR codes at the wedding itself with a link to give money on the day. 'It's their day so I guess if you are a guest you have to play by their rules,' says Windsor. 'It's a little transactional but today it's all about convenience and practicality as well as instant gratification.' Can I ignore a request for cash and give a gift instead? This is a tricky one. Wyse says it's your prerogative to give whatever you like, but she warns that you might need to put your thinking cap on if you decide to buy them a gift instead. 'Generally, if couples are asking for money, that means there will not be a conventional wedding gift list, probably because the couple have already set up their home and do not have any pressing household needs. So if you want to give a gift instead of money you will need to find something quirky, unique or original.' But there is always the risk that the couple won't be thankful – especially if their taste is not the same as yours. Sarah Coles, head of personal finance at Hargreaves Lansdown, points out there's always one person at every wedding that turns up with homewares the couple didn't want or need. 'If you're very close to them, and giving them a really special gift they'll treasure for life, there's an argument that this is the exception to the rule,' she suggests. 'If it's a more distant relative, and you're hoping to give them a vase or a candle, then chances are they'd prefer the cash.' Is it OK to turn up without a gift? However much you have spent attending the wedding, all our experts agree it's not OK to turn up without a gift at all. Not only is a wedding a significant life event, but it's a lavish act of hospitality too. 'It's traditionally frowned upon to show up and not give a gift at all – in the same way you wouldn't rock up to a child's birthday party without a present,' says Coles. Wyse adds: 'You really should comply unless, of course, the couple stipulate that they do not want presents, or ask you to make a donation to a charity instead.' If you really can't afford either a gift or to attend the wedding, Coles says it's important to be upfront with the couple. 'Bear in mind that you're not duty bound to go to the wedding if it will cause financial issues. Just thank them for the invitation, explain the situation, and arrange to meet up for a cut-price celebration later.'
BBC News
01-07-2025
- Entertainment
- BBC News
'Don't call it Wimbledon': The unspoken spectator rules and dress codes of the tennis tournament
The Championships have begun, and the quintessentially British tennis tournament has some very particular codes for attendees to follow. How are spectators expected to behave, and what should they – or should they definitely not – wear? Afternoon tea, a stiff upper lip and Wimbledon – all so deeply "British" that they've become part of the nation's international brand; the things that seem to make Britain, Britain, and tempt tourists from far and wide to observe them for themselves. The optics of the annual tennis tournament in south London – the strawberries and cream, the Pimm's, the ball girls and boys – are all intrinsic to this frightfully British institution. It is a marker of "The Season", alongside the likes of the Chelsea Flower Show, Henley and Ascot, as well, of course, as being a place where balls are expertly hit by rackets. Equally intrinsic to the Britishness of the tournament are its less tangible cornerstones. Its rules and the etiquette are paramount, both in terms of behaviour and dress – in other words, what to wear, and what falls a little long of the baseline. So what does the etiquette of Wimbledon entail? For starters, according to the self-styled queen of etiquette, Laura Windsor – who advised on the TV series Bridgerton – don't call it Wimbledon. "Really, when one refers to Wimbledon, one should say the Championships, as they are the oldest and most prestigious lawn tennis championships in the world." Another suitable moniker is simply "the tennis". Attendees should, she tells the BBC, be behaving "with modesty… That's our Britishness, isn't it? We're prim and proper". What does this look like? For a start, avoiding many of the kinds of behaviours that are the norm at other sporting events, and instead behaving in ways arguably more in line with theatre-going, keeping things largely hushed, and not cracking out a selfie-stick – they were banned from the tournament in 2015. Although for British etiquette coach and author of Just Good Manners, William Hanson, "anyone who is still using a selfie-stick in 2025 should be monitored closely, anyway". Best behaviour According to Hanson, "while people love the social side of Wimbledon, it is worth remembering that it is a seated, sporting event that comes with its own set of court-side rules." He goes on: "Be punctual, and get in your seat in good time… respect the fact that you can only come and go during a changeover." Of course, phones should be on silent. But he also extends his guidance to how best to rally around the players, and officials, on court: 'Be sporting with your support, and never cheer errors or mistakes. Respect the silence during play, and save clapping and cheering for between points. Avoid disturbing the players by calling out, and remember the umpire's decision is final – never heckle or question line calls." Beyond that, "keep your yourself to yourself," he says. "Be aware of those sitting around you, and keep within the space of your seat – even if it is limited, try not to spill over into someone else's personal space accidentally." And, in case you were thinking about sneaking in a tuna melt, "avoid disturbing the peace by rustling wrappers or eating messy or smelly food". Most obviously, though, the rules are embodied in what to wear – "the best way to show good behaviour is by dressing appropriately," says Windsor. While Wimbledon has no strict dress code, smart dress is encouraged, especially on the show courts. Plus certain items, such as ripped jeans, dirty trainers and anything with a political statement, are banned. "Be comfortable and appropriate for the weather," says Hanson, "but avoid anything that is overly casual or better worn at the beach". Unofficial dress code Unofficially, however, Wimbledon has developed its own set of style rules. Take for proof of these unspoken but still-tangible "rules" the criticism that Meghan, Duchess of Sussex faced from some corners for wearing jeans, alongside a hat and blazer, to watch her friend Serena Williams play in 2019. For Daniel-Yaw Miller, sports and fashion journalist and founder of the SportsVerse newsletter, "when you think about Wimbledon dressing, everyone has the same kind of thing in mind – either white or beige. You wear a blazer, you can wear a hat." Guests often favour floral frocks, polka dots and tailoring. By osmosis, a dress code seems to have been landed upon. For Windsor, dressing appropriately means "something that is demure and sophisticated," such as crisp linen and tailored pieces. While Hanson points out that "wide-brimmed hats are best avoided as they can get in the way of those sitting behind you," Panama hats have become something of an official Wimbledon uniform, popular in the audience from the start of the 20th Century. Over the years, a number of high-profile celebrities have offered up glowing examples of how to ace it sartorially in the stands of Centre Court. Zendaya, patron saint of "tenniscore", schooled Wimbledon-goers last year when she wore Ralph Lauren menswear-inspired looks – crisp white and old school tweed suit jackets, blue-and-white-striped shirts and ties. More like this:• The world's first global sporting celebrity• How 'dollar princesses' brought US flair• Why Wimbledon players dress code is so strict Other smashes include Meghan in neat pleats and white shirts, Keira Knightley in a dropped-waist Chanel dress, Tom Cruise, year-on-year, in natty suit after natty suit, Alexa Chung in Aran-knit cardigans and crisp cotton poplin skirts, and Pierce Brosnan in navy linen suits with neat pocket squares. Arguably, however, queen of SW19 dressing is Sienna Miller, thanks to her broderie anglaise dresses and easy-breezy linen suits, bright white Galvan jumpsuits and polka dots. Others have aced it despite not sticking to the script – see Grace Jones in a flight suit for a perfect example, or Idris Elba in a striking Super Eagles shirt. Catherine, Princess of Wales, who is the royal patron of the All England Lawn Tennis Club, often wears green or purple, the official colours of the tournament since 1909. In recent years she's attended in a plethora of shades of green, such as a forest green Dolce & Gabbana crepe midi-dress in 2019, and in 2021 an emerald green Emilia Wickstead number – the colour of the grass at the beginning of the tournament, if not the end. Last year, Kate wore a purple Safiyaa dress to present the trophies for the men's singles. Sense of tradition The presence of royalty every year underlines the event's sense of tradition, and tennis has long been associated with wealth, status and glamour. "Tennis was this social game, rather elite and glamorous," says Elizabeth Wilson, author of Love Game: A History of Tennis, from Victorian Pastime to Global Phenomenon – its original setting was the country house. "It is, without doubt, a traditionally upper-class sport, and that essence still permeates through a lot of tennis," says Miller. He likens it to cricket, or Ascot, "where you have to be so respectful, as an outsider coming in, of the rules". Even among tennis tournaments, Wimbledon is extra-proper. "You look at other grand slams, [it] is the polar opposite," Miller says, mentioning some examples: walk-out music, players dancing as they come out, Kiss Cam, hot dogs for sale and T-shirt guns. It is, says Miller, "one of the last bastions of old-school British culture in the mainstream". Its archaic quality is, for some, part of its charm and appeal. "I see Wimbledon as essentially like a museum. You go there for a fascinating day out, for an insight into what the past of British society looked like," he says. All this also has its downsides. "From a fan perspective, you're really made to feel like you're stepping into a space that is not yours," says Miller. You need, to a certain extent, "to act like you've been there before". Shifting codes Over the years, however, Wimbledon's codes have been shifting. In lots of ways Wilson thinks "it's more participatory [now]". In the past, "people have described how the atmosphere was more like a cathedral, there was a rather holy atmosphere – whereas that's very far from how it is today." Hanson agrees. "If we think of the Henman Hill/Murray Mound (and the rest), levels of patriotism and emotion, it is unlike public displays we would have seen in the past." Crowds do now whoop and shout, at least between points, and even partake in the occasional Mexican wave, which, according to Wilson, "nobody would have thought of doing in the 1950s". When Miller went last year, he "could definitely feel that it was a bit more of a modern tennis experience". He can feel it, he says, "loosening up, just the tiniest bit". Dress-wise, also, attitudes are softening. Miller sees Idris Elba and David Beckham as shining examples of dressers who know how to be Wimbledon-appropriate without looking stuck in the past. "The look is more 'fancy barbecue' than 'super formal event'". For Hanson, points of etiquette prevail. "Etiquette is all about how our actions and behaviours affect or impact other people. We need to be considerate and careful in how we behave to ensure that everyone has a great day watching tennis. Wimbledon thrives on its age-old rituals, and remains one of the key traditional British summer sporting events – hopefully, for this special fortnight, we can all remember our manners, on court and off." -- For more Culture stories from the BBC, follow us on Facebook, X and Instagram.
Yahoo
10-06-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
Invitations to funerals and shouting at the news: 10 signs you're getting old
The signs are gradual but deadly. You start saying things like, 'This carpet will see me out,' and, 'This is how I've always done things.' Young people kneel beside you to explain how technology works. You bulk-order vitamins from Amazon, which then sit in the hallway gathering dust. Let's face it: life is getting smaller and narrower. You only eat soft foods now, for fear of fracturing a tooth. You haven't made a new friend in a decade. An early night and a mug of sleepy tea is all you require. Yes, you are officially drifting into dreaded OAP territory. But don't worry – we've consulted the experts to identify the tell-tale signs of ageing in both men and women, and whether there's anything you can do about them. Clearly, this young person thinks you're an old bag at risk of toppling over – or, if you're a man, an infirm old fool. Is this the moment you need to consider cosmetic work – or a hair transplant to hide the bald patch? The horror. But what do you do when this dreaded scenario occurs? Do you accept gracefully – and feel crushed – or brush off the invitation? I consult the UK's 'Queen of Etiquette', Laura Windsor, who is reassuring. 'It's not necessarily because you 'look' old – it could be because you deserve respect and courtesy from those who pick up on your body language and are drawn to you in a positive way,' she says. 'If someone stands up for you, it's possible your body language was crying out for a seat. I'm younger, but sometimes a man will offer me a seat – and I'm so grateful – especially when I'm wearing high heels or carrying bags.' We just need to smile, say 'Thank you very much, you are very kind' – and accept gracefully, she advises. 'Never brush off the invitation unless you don't want to sit. In that case, always say, 'Thank you for your kind gesture.' Being courteous makes the other person feel valued – and makes us feel good too.' There comes a time in life when wedding invitations dry up, the babies whose christenings you once attended have now left home – and the number of funeral announcements is getting suspiciously larger. So it's no wonder most of us keep a top-to-bottom smart black outfit in the wardrobe. And anyway, after a lifetime of deciding what to wear, maintaining a black uniform feels like the easy way out – doesn't it? But while some people can pull off head-to-toe black – à la Mafia widow or Milk Tray man – most of us end up looking a bit dusty, says Lucinda Chambers, ex-Vogue fashion director and co-founder of 'When you reach a certain age, you feel more vulnerable, and there's a definite nervousness that creeps in – you're afraid of any display of individuality, extravagance or idiosyncrasy. Black is a very easy rut to fall into, because you think it goes with everything. I never put black with black. I combine it with navy or cream to sharpen it up.' Author and broadcaster Hunter Davies, 89, is more definitive: 'No one over 70 should wear black or grey. I only now wear clothes in pink, yellow, green, blue – usually at the same time.' It can feel like a death knell when you mention a new symptom to the GP and they say bluntly: 'Yes, that's just going to be how it is from now on.' But don't believe them – it's never too late to get in shape. Our bodies are equipped with incredible restorative capacity. 'The most health-preserving physical activity you can do is resistance training, because muscle loss (sarcopenia) is both a characteristic and driver of ageing and age-related disease,' says Dr Nathan Curran of London's Reborne Longevity Clinic. 'And skeletal muscle will not only help to prevent falls – it also protects your bones from osteoporosis, which can lead to fractures following a fall. About one in ten people with a hip fracture die within a month – and about one in three die within a year. Anything that stresses your cardiovascular system, and your musculature, is like an insurance policy – not just against dying prematurely, but also for maintaining quality of life in later years.' It's also an insurance policy for slowing down neurodegeneration and dementia, he adds. 'There are very interesting links between loss of cerebral volume – especially in the hippocampus, the part of the brain responsible for memory – and sarcopenia [age-related loss of muscle mass, strength and function]. There isn't a drug combination that comes remotely close to matching exercise for providing comprehensive benefits for brain health.' Turning 60 is a milestone for many reasons – and while it's useful to know you now qualify for free London bus travel, that fact alone is depressing enough. That's before you even come to take the accompanying photo. Do try to look your best – but don't take it too hard if the image ends up looking like a mugshot, advises Lucinda Chambers. 'You're going to look at that bus pass photo for the next 20 years, so you might as well look cheerful. Having said that, mine looks like Prisoner: Cell Block H...' Generally speaking, our experts say it's important to glam up – and rail against the dying of the light. PR expert Fiona Harrold says, 'It's about self-worth. Because if you don't care about how you look, how are other people going to respect you? You're projecting an image of yourself to the world every time you step out the front door. Do you see yourself as attractive, groomed? Because your vibe will go down if you walk around constantly looking dishevelled. We automatically equate that with a loss of va-va-voom – or even depression. We've got to let go of what 59 or 60 looks like in our heads, because it's changed. We all know biological ageing and chronological ageing are two different things now.' Veteran journalist Virginia Ironside agrees: 'I know lots of people who say, 'Oh great. I'm old – I can let myself go.' But that's fatal. You must always be clean, have your hair looking nice, try to keep reasonably thin. Keep your standards up – eat at a table, change your sheets every couple of weeks.' It's very fogeyish behaviour to complain about loud music, tiny sharing plates – or eating off a roof tile – says Jennifer Sharp, former restaurant editor of Harper's Bazaar. She'll happily trek miles to a modern Korean joint in Hackney to try the latest cuisine. She loves eating solo and is a fan of the communal tables available for walk-ins. 'I like all the well-priced small plates that let you trawl through the menu without breaking the bank.' Regularity, she believes, is the enemy of life. 'The easiest way to stay feeling young is to be curious. I never feel I know everything – whether it's food or art or movies or politics. Stay open to new experiences and opinions. Say yes to things.' It's mortifying enough to eavesdrop on the conversations your younger colleagues are having – but to be mistaken for one of their grandparents when you've popped out for a lunchtime snack together is even worse. But there's no shame in being called out for your age, says poet and author Sarah-Jane Lovett. Instead of trying to hide our advancing years – or our grandparenting status – we should revel in the fact that being a modern grandmother or grandfather is something to celebrate. Lovett – a grandmother of two, currently writing a book called The Glamma Diaries – insists: 'We are gods and goddesses of sorts, the elders who bring insight and wisdom to bestow upon the youngers. The trick is to create a force field of magic, underpinned with a firm but kind air of grooviness. Obviously, no one wants to get cancelled for doing the wrong thing – but grandmothers are brilliant at spotting diplomatic minefields and circumnavigating them with aplomb.' And what happens when your woke grandchildren come to stay? She adds: 'As the absolute Queen of the Diplomatic Corps, you will always be prepared with the diplomatic bag – and a heaving fridge full of gluten-free pasta, dairy-free cheese, nut milk, coconut yoghurt and Nosecco. So you really are the ultimate 21st-century gal when the smalls arrive.' Elderly female relatives once had a weekly shampoo and set – and never went out in the rain. We've come a long way since then, but many of us still hide behind a heavy fringe or wispy locks we trim ourselves. The decision to go grey or not is unimportant (just look at super-agers Helen Mirren and Andie MacDowell). But a sharp cut can take off decades – so keep investing in that hairdresser's appointment. 'I firmly believe women can embrace new styles at any age,' says celebrity hair stylist Dar Barot. 'It's about taking that first step and being open to transformation. When hair obscures your face, it can hide features such as well-shaped eyebrows, beautiful eyes, defined cheekbones, a strong jawline – and especially the neckline and shoulders, which are crucial for creating a youthful appearance. A sculpted haircut that frames your face should emphasise these features, while complementing your body shape.' And men shouldn't be complacent either – shaggy eyebrows, unkempt nose hair and a bad comb-over are definite turn-offs. 'My own bugbear is the fade haircut – shortening the hair on the sides and back of the head, with longer hair on top – for older men,' says Barot. 'It resembles a hat rather than enhancing their features. It was also Hitler's favourite hairstyle, so be warned.' You might have raised them – but when your own kids have babies, it can lead to some awkward moments when it becomes clear they're unwilling to trust their precious bundle with you. 'When your beloved offspring and their partner tell you the new thinking on pregnancy, childbirth or child-rearing that they've gleaned in their ante-natal group or from Instagram, listen, keep quiet and do not express an opinion,' advises Lovett. 'If they wax lyrical about placenta encapsulation, don't use the word ridiculous or the phrase 'we didn't do that in my day.' Just swallow and say, 'That sounds great.' 'No one wants to hear about the dark ages – ie before 1990 – and no one ever acknowledges that you've gone through this experience yourself. Understand that while you, until fairly recently, reigned supreme in your family, you are, in one blow, felled. So hold on to the life skills you have acquired and use them with steely dignity – empathy, listening well, cooking for everyone. Modern, shiny parents are there to make us look as if we didn't have the foggiest idea of what we were doing. They are a glossy brigade, with their spreadsheets and everything accessible on an app – and we must also learn from them. They take no prisoners, not even if you gave birth to them.' Okay, so there's an entire sitcom – One Foot in the Grave – dedicated to the phenomenon of men getting grumpier and grumpier as they age. But while Victor Meldrew might have been a bit of an old curmudgeon, he definitely tried to keep himself busy when he wasn't shouting at the TV. 'When you're passively sitting in front of the television, not much is going on in there,' says Prof Kieran Clarke, 73, emeritus professor of physiological biochemistry at the University of Oxford. 'Concentrating is really good for your brain,' she explains. 'Puzzles keep the connections up and the electrics going. You're concentrating all the time and the synaptic connections between neurones are functioning properly.' Watching upsetting news is also genuinely bad for our health. 'Only worry about things you can do something about. Don't worry about anything you can't do anything about,' counsels Prof Clarke, who reads a book instead of looking at her phone before bed. She also advocates listening to Radio 4 and the World Service. 'It helps the cells regenerate, it keeps you stimulated. It's like exercising the brain.' Probably the hardest challenge of old age is finding a new partner if you've been struck by death or divorce. The temptation is to shut up shop to new admirers – but that would be ignoring the fact there's a very buzzy later-life dating scene out there. 'Dating is all about the mindset. If you're open to new experiences and meeting others, and you're easy to approach, you'll naturally attract the right kind of attention,' says Niloufar Lamakan, 66, whose new novel Aged To Perfection tackles 60+ dating using apps, as well as other, more adventurous ways of meeting potential new partners. 'Being open doesn't necessarily mean compromising, but involves giving people and situations a chance.' Lamakan advocates practising openness physically – opening your arms, breathing in and welcoming the world every morning. 'Having fun and being in the moment is also an attractive trait. Being advised to find a hobby might sound like a cliché, but it's a great way to do something you enjoy and increase your chances of meeting someone. But, if you're happy being single, make the most of the freedom and find your own tribe to enjoy life alongside.' Broaden your horizons with award-winning British journalism. Try The Telegraph free for 1 month with unlimited access to our award-winning website, exclusive app, money-saving offers and more.
Daily Mail
20-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Chelsea Flower Show loses its bloom! Royal event is overrun by influencers and reality stars - so, who was a rose among thorns in the fashion stakes?
The Chelsea Flower Show has long been one of the highlights of the annual royal calendar since the first event was held in 1912. Organised by the Royal Horticultural Society in London 's chicest borough, the garden show has historically been attended by senior royals - with everyone from the late Queen Elizabeth II and King Charles, to the Prince and Princess of Wales stopping by to smell the roses. As it returned to the manicured lawns of the Royal Hospital of Chelsea for its 113th edition, however, reality TV stars and social media influencers far outnumbered the royals - with Charles, 76, and Camilla, 77, among the family's only representatives. Experts noted that while these celebrities can sometimes up the glamour quotient, not all of them are familiar with the correct protocol, Britain's self-styled Queen of Etiquette Laura Windsor told MailOnline. 'Celebrities taking the spotlight, as well as influencers getting in the way with their Iphones can just get too much for those who are more interested in admiring the scene, leading to comments such as "Oh, not another celeb" or "I wish this person would stop taking 100 photos of the same flower!" 'Discretion, nowadays, is what people want,' she continued, adding the focus should be solely on the display gardens. Further, while Queen Camilla 's leaf print dress fit the fashion brief perfectly, other attendees appear to have misunderstood the memo as all-black ensembles, ill-fitting suits, and garish prints were spotted throughout day one. Whether it was Lady Amelia Windsor 's dark co-ord set or Gemma Collins 's long-sleeved cobalt maxi dress, a majority of the celebrity looks missed the mark this year. While there 's no official dress code at the RHS Chelsea Flower Show, attendees are advised to wear sturdy shoes, carry a light, waterproof jacket as well as sunglasses while showing off the best of their spring-summer wardrobes. Fail-safe options include midi dresses, floaty floral frocks, well-tailored suits in pastel hues such as lilac and sage green, and linen trousers. Guests are advised against wearing jeans, flip-flops, stilletos, and strappy sandals, with 'smart casual' outfits typically being the order of the day. While the Chelsea Flower Show is not as formal as Royal Ascot, which kicks off next month, untucked shirts, cropped tops, and elaborate headgear could reasonably considered a sartorial faux pas at London's buzziest garden show. AJ Pritchard & Zara Zoffany While AJ Pritchard and Zara Zoffany were the eptiome of relationship goals, their fashion choices for this year's Chelsea Flower Show left much to be desired. Zara, who said 'yes' to the former Strictly Come Dancing Star's marriage proposal in March, wore a midriff-baring crop top with a pair of low-rise jeans that may have been a tad too casual for the event. She accessorised with multiple necklaces, a fitness tracker with a bright orange strap, and this season's hottest plush toy - the Labubu doll - attached to her shoulder bag. Ferne McCann Former TOWIE star Ferne McCann picked a lemon yellow midi dress that boasted a plunging neckline and might have been more fitting for a day out at the races than the prized garden show. Her leaf-strapped high heels were almost too literal - and might have made walking through the gardens an uphill task. Gemma Collins Reality TV star Gemma Collins showed off her slimmed-down figure in a sheer gown with caped sleeves that swept the floor. The reality starlet, 44, who has gone from a size 26 to a size 20 in just three months after using the weight loss jab Mounjaro, added a pair of bejewelled cat eye sunglasses that added little to her look. Tasha Ghouri Tasha Ghouri's maximalist outfit was a little too much for the Chelsea Flower Show, as the British model and dancer wore a corseted mini dress with a ruffled cape, heels from Steve Madden, and an oversized flower crown for this year's edition. In a post on her Instagram page, Tasha - who was born deaf - revealed the headpiece was fashioned from alliums and dandelions 'to highlight the parallels between the abilities of both plants and young people to overcome adversity'. Nadiya Bychkova Strictly Come Dancing star Nadiya Bychkova's Louboutin stilletos were a tad too high for a garden show, as the Ukrainian ballroom dancer joined the group of British tv stars in attendance at the Chelsea Flower Show on Monday. Her thigh-skimming evening dress flattered her figure, but the short, powder-blue number felt more appropriate for a night-out than a sun-soaked morning inspecting prize-winning blooms. Myleene Klass Hear'Say star Myleene Klass picked a daring dress, with a thigh-high slit, for her appearance at the flower show this year, While the floral print of the ruffled number was on theme, the fit isn't particularly flattering on Mylene and is a boring fashion choice for the otherwise typically-glam for the Loose Women presenter. Nancy Sorrell Love Actually star Nancy Sorrell picked a pink, rose-printed maxi dress that clashed with her white boots - as her confused ensemble failed to impress. Her choice of accessories was equally baffling, as Nancy picked a pair of beaded bracelets and orange sunglasses - neither of which complemented her look. Clara Amfo Clara Amfo's corporate-inspired outfit felt like she was rushing off for a meeting right after the flower show, as the BBC 1 radio star wore striped navy trousers with a white bodysuit and a beige, cropped trench jacket. However, the accessories she added - including the white bag - made the look feel off-balance in the absence of one striking element that could tie everything together. Lady Amelia Windsor While Lady Amelia Windsor rarely finds herself on 'Worst Dressed' lists, the black co-ord set - comprising a cropped top and maxi skirt - she picked for the flower show isn't her finest hour. Coupled with her brown leather loafers, the 29-year-old's outfit felt uninspired - especially considering the granddaughter of Prince Edward, Duke of Kent, was representing the sparse royal brigade. Jason Statham Hollywood action star Jason Statham rounded out the list of 'worst dressed celebrities' on the first day of the 2025 Chelsea Flower Show, as he also picked a drab all-black look for the event. The 57-year-old wore cargo pants with a full-sleeved sweater and a matching cap as he put on a very animated display while examining the exhibits. Amanda Holden Amanda Holden cut a stylish figure as she attended the Chelsea Flower Show in a striking, chevron print pink and white Suzannah London co-ord that was a welcome departure from florals. The TV presenter, 54, was all smiles for the inaugural event in the classic patterned number, which featured a long ruffled skirt. It featured an open oyster design at the bottom, adding to the overall timeless style of the outfit. She accessorised the dress with a pair of large sunglasses, silver jewellery and a small handbag. Jade Holland Cooper Jade Holland Cooper, who is the Princess of Wales' favourite designer, appeared to take style cues from Catherine as she wore a navy blue, polka-dotted dress that was the epitome of quiet luxury. The British fashion designer dove into her own closet and flaunted the Annabel pleated maxi dress from her latest collection for the flower show - with Jade adding a pair of matching blue wedges, simple gold earrings, and a gold wrist watch. Natalie Rushdie Scottish jazz singer Natalie Rushdie picked a stunning floral dress and jacket from Alice + Olivia that far outranked any of the other botanical-inspired outfits from day one of the show. The breezy linen bustier dress featured the brand's 'Dusk to Dawn' print that paid homage to Claude Monet's 'Femmes au Jardin' oil painting in perhaps the most thoughtful interpretation of the theme. The 38-year-old picked one of couture milliner Sarah Cant's bespoke hats to top off her look. Dame Mary Berry Dame Mary Berry was a vision in her soft pink, sheer dress that was cinched at the waist with a matching belt, as the 90-year-old garden show veteran gave some of the younger attendees a style lesson. She finished her look with a pair of beige, suede slingback flats and a matching Michael Kors clutch bag that perfectly complemented the midi dress from Miss Rosier.
