
Is France really in a 'sex recession'?
Sociologist Marie Bergström took a slightly different approach to the topic: 'Sexuality is a matter of concern, worry, maybe even moral panic among a certain generation. But it's really, I think, a misunderstanding of what's going on,' she said. 'We do not see a sex recession among young people.'
She and her team have spent the past two years asking more than 10,000 young people across France about their sex life and relationships, and what she found is that the frequency of sexual intercourse is not necessarily the best and only indicator of young people's interest in sex.
Less sex, but more partners?
Standing in her office at the French Institute for Demographic Studies (INED) surrounded by neat stacks of books, Dr. Bergström said: 'Actually, what's happening is that we see more single people, and being single leads to two things – less regular sex, but more sexual partners.'
As it turns out, singledom can actually be quite an intense period for young people. 'They have multiple partners, so it's not couple relationships, of course, but it is sex friends, friends with benefits, one night stands ... these new types of relationships that are growing and becoming more important,' added Dr. Bergström.
About 40 minutes from her office, small groups of friends enjoying a break in the July sun peppered the banks of Paris 's Canal Saint Martin.
'I think that we have a vision that is a lot less binary when it comes to 'the couple', where we're not just either single or in a couple,' said Brian, 24. 'Now there are plenty of options, even things that are not well-defined in terms of words – and who cares? You are the one who chooses the kind of relationship you want to have with someone."
Dr. Bergström's research confirms that, although the couple remains the prevalent type of relationship among young people, the other kinds of relationships they are forming are diversifying.
On top of that, despite having sex less frequently, young people seem to have had many more sexual partners than previous generations at that age, especially young women. According to Dr. Bergström's research, today, on average, 29 percent of French heterosexual women aged 25 to 29 have had more than 10 sexual partners. In 2006, it was only 8 percent.
'Before, the goal was to find someone and be with that person for a long time. For us, it's more like, if you find someone and want to be with them long term, you can, but if you feel like sleeping with three different people you can also do that instead,' said Flavie, 21.
Her friend Rosalie, 22, sitting beside her, was quick to add: 'What we should look into is not if people are doing it less, it's if people are doing it better.'
It's not about quantity, but quality
Younger generations are tired of having sex for the sake of it, or because they feel like they have to, or because there is pressure. They want it to be an enjoyable experience. This was a recurring theme among the young people lounging along the canal.
'I don't think we are uninterested in sex. Rather, I think we're interested in sex that is done well. Moreover, I don't think our interest in sex should be judged based on the number of times we do it but rather on the quality of it, on the experience shared with another person,' said Brian.
Sitting a few metres away, Willo, 27, said 'I really think that more and more women are realising that they don't need a man in their life, that if they feel like it they can date and if they don't feel like it they can also not date anyone – for however long they choose to.'
The end of 'sex as a conjugal duty', the #MeToo movement, and the efforts made to bring consent to the forefront of debates around sex all contribute to women feeling more free to refuse sexual partners, according to studies by INED and IFOP. Or as Willo put it, 'They are retaking power over their relationships and their bodies.'
The younger generation is leading the way in putting consent and pleasure first, according to many of the people we spoke to. Rosalie felt strongly about this: 'Before, the focus was maybe more on reproduction. Now, we talk a lot more about pleasure. We are less interested in a sexual act that is very focused on the chronology of foreplay and then penetration. Now it's a lot more diverse and I think that's great.'
Changing practices require new questions
So, if sex and relationships are changing, should the questions we ask about them also change? According to Marie Bergström, although surveys that give us a picture of the frequency of sexual relations are still useful, 'We need to find new ways to survey sex. We need to ask more about different types of relationships. We need to take into account the fact that sex today can be different than it used to be. And actually if you change the questions to capture these new realities, you will find that the intimate lives of 20-year-olds is quite intense and it's definitely very diverse. '
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